Loco for Loko

Loco for Loko

Online readers comment on "Four Loko: We Investigate Just How Bad It Is (UPDATED With Morning-After Reflections)", Hair Balls blog, by Richard Connelly and Craig Hlavaty, October 28:

Dumb: Well, when you drink them like that you would be sick. I love these drinks. Three Lokos in two hours is stupid. Would you drink 18 beers in two hours?


Yes: I would drink 18 beers in two hours. See ex-girlfriend's birthday party 2009. I salute you, Hlavaty. You have more hair on your man balls than I do. I only drink one of these things at a time.

Ryan M.

Know your tolerance: Stupid people need to know their tolerance before they go and chug three Four Lokos. I am in college. I drink them on a monthly basis, and I am fine when I drink them. My friends who drink them frequently say they tolerate them well, too. As for the ­stupid students in Washington, they need to learn their limits. There is no reason Four Loko should be banned while bars can still serve multi-shots full of Red Bull and a vodka of choice. They are the same thing. This is crazy.

Stevie Wonder

No way: Anyone wanna bet this guy didn't drink three in a couple hours? That's asking for death! This article is a hoax.

Save 4 LOKO!!!

Bad idea: This drink seriously needs to get off the market. We have fucked with too much stuff, but this is taking it way too far. Who thought it was a great idea to mix alcohol and caffeine? Well, I already know that I'm going to outlive those idiots that are drinking this bullshit.

Some person who hates this drink

Heroism confirmed: Hey, just letting you know — Craig did indeed perform this heroic act. I don't know for sure how deep he got into the third can — there's apparently some dispute whether he finished it or not — but I do know we had to hunt him down to get him to file the thing, eventually ­finding him "taking a nap" on the office couch.


Happy editor: I hope your editor is happy and got the hits to the site they wanted for subjecting you to this bullshit. This is ­irresponsible on your superior's part. You should get a bonus for doing this. You are a ­human being, a fine writer and not a guinea pig.


Hey: That was messed up what you did last night, bro.

Craig's vital organs


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