So with the end of the year fast approaching, I thought I would take some time to revisit some of the highlights, and lowlights, of this past sports year. Your list is probably different, but these are the things that caught my attention this year.
1. Brett Favre retired. Again. Then he unretired. Again.
2. Thanks to Jenn Sterger, we know all kinds of details about Favre's penis. Which kind of makes you wish that he would have stayed retired.
3. And thanks to Favre's penis, Jenn Sterger is once again relevant.
4. The New Orleans Saints won the Super Bowl. This was supposed to be impossible because, according to some of the experts over at the Houston Chronicle, a first-time head coach, having to rebuild the entire roster of an awful football team shouldn't be able to even make the playoffs in his first five years as head coach, and we should all just be grateful for a 9-7 record.
5. Hey, UT tried to destroy the Big 12. When that failed, they went about destroying their own football team. Many more seasons like this one just ended and about the only people watching the Texas Longhorns Network will be Aggies looking for some comedy.
6. But hey, at least UT finally got rid of offensive coordinator Greg Davis. Yeah, like he's the reason the offense sucked so much.
8. The U.S. laid a stink bomb in the World Cup. Again. And once again, the U.S. pretended to actually give a damn about soccer.
9. Urban Meyer becomes the Brett Favre of NCAA Football coaches as he retires for the second time in a year.
10. Roger Clemens was finally indicted.
11. The San Francisco Giants won the World Series. This is the first time the Giants have won the World Series since 1954, and it is the first time since they relocated from New York to San Francisco.
12. Speaking of baseball, a certain person with the Houston Press not only picked six of the eight teams to make the playoffs, he also picked the Giants to make the World Series. And there were very few people who did that.
13. Of course, that idiot with the Press failed to pick the Cincinnati Reds or the Texas Rangers to make the playoffs. And he picked the Twins to win it all.
14. Unlike the Houston Astros in 2005, the Texas Rangers were actually able to win a game in the World Series.
15. Speaking of the Texas Rangers, starting pitcher Cliff Lee became the most famous Cliff since that Cliff Clavin guy.
16. The Chicago Blackhawks won the Stanley Cup for the first time since 1961.
17. Of course, since we're talking about hockey, this was ignored by ESPN so that they could give more unwanted and unneeded attention to the World Cup.
18. ESPN ran the Lebron James infomercial The Decision in which James crapped all over the city of Cleveland when he decided to sign a contract with the Miami Heat.
19. But despite a roster that includes James, Dwyane Wade, and Chris Bosh, the Heat still aren't as good a team as the Los Angeles Lakers, San Antonio Spurs, or the Boston Celtics.
20. The NBA meanwhile, has had to take control of the failing New Orleans Hornets.
21. The NCAA nails USC for major recruiting violations relating to Reggie Bush and O.J. Mayo. Of course, the NCAA being the NCAA, the Trojans escape without being hit with the death penalty, which is supposed to be applied to colleges that commit major infractions within one five year period.
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22. Meanwhile, the NCAA concluded that Heisman winner Cam Newton, the starting quarterback for the number one rated Auburn Tigers, was eligible to play despite Newton's father violating most of the rules in the book.
23. In the perfect metaphor for their season, the Metrodome roof collapsed under heavy snow this weekend, forcing the NFL to move the Vikings game against the New York Giants to Detroit.
24. Here's a shocker, the Denver Broncos were caught spying on the practices of the San Francisco 49ers. Who would have ever thought that a guy who once worked for Bill Belichick would get caught cheating?
25. But now that Josh McDaniels has been fired as the head coach of the Broncos, does this mean that he's going to be hired by Gary Kubiak?