Rice Sex Survey: Are You Sexier Than A Rice Freshman?

You wanna know WHAT?!

Rice University likes to greatly ease freshmen into the college experience, with plenty of group meetings where they "rap" about "what's happening" and so forth.

For years, that process has sometimes included a 100-question quiz on your personal sexual history. Nothing official from the school, but just something that got passed around, filled out and discussed.

Why the fuck anyone would fill this out, much less gossip about their score, is beyond us, but then again we were never Rice material.

Take a look at the questions....

(Note: Different versions of the test have been used throughout the years; we think the current version takes gay sex into account a little more gracefully. Not to mention this one has a question about "drive-in movies." Oh, and "MOS" stands for "member of the opposite sex.")

Have you ever:
1. had a date? (At Rice? ha!)
2. told a dirty joke to a MOS?
3. been out on a date after 4 A.M.?
4. had an (M) erection (F) clitoral erection?
5. had a blind date?
6. danced cheek to cheek?
7. kissed a MOS?
8. kissed a MOS in the horizontal position?
9. kissed a MOS in the last three months?
10. kissed underwater?
11. been French kissed?
12. kissed a MOS on the thigh?
13. [ (M) kissed (F) been kissed by ] a MOS on the breast?
14. necked?
15. necked for more than two hours consecutively?
16. come while necking?
17. seen a naked MOS over age 15?
18. been seen naked by a MOS after puberty?
19. seen a stripper?
20. read a pornographic book or magazine?\
21. seen a pornographic movie?
22. comitted an act of voyuerism?
23. had an alcoholic drink? (At Rice? No way!)
24. been drunk?
25. used alcohol to lower a MOS's resistance to sexual activity?
26. smoked tobacco?
27. done marijuana or hashish?
28. used a stronger drug?
29. been arrested?
30. been convicted of a crime?
31. [ (M) fondled the breasts of (F) had your breasts fondled by ] a MOS?
32. caressed a MOS's thigh?
33. fondled a MOS's ass? 
34. fondled a MOS's genitals?
35. [ (M) Done (F) had ] a coed clitoral stimulation?
36. had orgasm due to manipulation by a MOS?
37. had your genitals fondled?
38. gone through the motions of intercourse while fully dressed?
39. massaged or been massaged by a MOS?
40. showered, bathed, or saunaed with a MOS?
41. been undressed by a MOS?
42. undressed a MOS?
43. had sexual intercourse?
44. had sexual intercourse outdoors?
45. had sexual intercourse more than ten times?
46. had sexual intercourse with a virgin?

Ever been to an orgy?

47. had sexual intercourse three or more times in one night?

48. had sexual intercourse in a car?

49. had sexual intercourse with two MOS's within 24 hours?

50. had sexual intercourse in two or more different positions?

51. had sexual intercourse using a condom?

52. had sexual intercourse at a drive-in movie?

53. had sexual intercourse within the last three months?

54. had sexual intercourse while swimming?

55. had sexual intercourse while another person was sleeping in the same room?

56. had sexual intercourse at the MOS's house?

57. had anal intercourse?

58. [ (M) impregnated a woman (F) been pregnant ] ?

59. [ (M) arranged (F) had ] an abortion?

60. gone on or been the object of a nookie run of over 100 miles?

61. described a sexual experience to a third party?

62. attended an orgy?

63. committed incest?

64. comitted statuatory rape?

65. committed or been the victim of forceable rape?

66. propositioned by a prosititue or pimp?


67. accepted a proposition from a prostitute or pimp?

68. engaged in fellatio?

69. gone 69?

Questions, questions

70. engaged in cunnilingus?

71. masturbated?

72. masturbated with another person in the room?

73. masturbated to a picture?

74. been caught masturbating?

75. watched another person masturbate?

76. been propositioned by a homosexual?

77. accepted a proposition from a homosexual?

78. been masturbated by a member of the same sex?

79. anally stimualted a member of the same sex?

80. had anal intercourse with a homosexual?

81. lived in a coed room with three or more occupants?

82. been displaced by a MOS staying with roommate for one or more nights?

83. committed an oops (barging in on an embarassing situation)?

84. spent night in a MOS's room or apartment?

85. slept with a MOS?

86. wrestled with a MOS?

87. had a VD test due to reasonable suspicision?

88. had VD?

89. had passion cramps?

90. fondled a MOS under 13 years old?

91. worn a MOS's clothing?

92. committed bestiality? (Squirrels count)

93. tasted semen?

94. simulated intercourse with an inanimate object?

95. played coed strip poker?

96. picked up a MOS?

97. had an orgasm in a dream?

98. had a sexual experience before puberty?

99. purchased contraceptives in a drugstore?

100. committed an act of exhibitionism?

Danced cheek to cheek?

Anyway, give yourself a point for each "yes." Separate scoring for now, and for that unique moment when you were a college freshman.

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