It's funny, it's been so long since I was in an NFL city that had a high draft pick and an acute need at the quarterback position, I had forgotten how much
garbage fun Pro Days for quarterbacks are.
Add into this the fact that the opinions among fans, and (now, to a lesser degree) pundits are so diverse on the three quarterbacks in the mix for the Texans, and add to that the fact that we can watch the actual workouts play out on television and Twitter, and the degree to which every piece of minutiae is parsed out is pretty mind blowing.
We even learn now when the Texans general manager shakes hands with a prospect!
Looks like it's go time. After a hand shake from #Texans GM Rick Smith, Blake Bortles looks to be ready to throw for everyone.
— James Palmer (@JPalmerCSN) March 19, 2014
Watching online as Bortles readies to throw. #Texans GM Rick Smith walked by, gave him a nudge and shook his hand.
— Dave Zangaro (@DZangaro) March 19, 2014
My guys James and Dave over at CSN Houston, doin' work!
So Blake Bortles went through his Pro Day yesterday, and apparently only three balls hit the ground. So he was better against air than Teddy Bridgewater.
This, to me, means very little. You see, I'm one of those crazy people that thinks guys might perform differently and even -- GASP -- raise their game when there are defenders providing resistance or an all out assault, i.e. Bridgewater's completing 71 percent of his real passes last season.
Experts who get paid way more than me, though, seem to disagree. They seem to think that Bortles combination of size and agility along with his ability to (drafty phrase WARNING) "drive the ball down the field" on throws with no pads and Carson Palmer's brother chasing him around in a t-shirt all make him the new flavor du jour.
Todd McShay, ESPN.com: "If I'm absolutely taking a quarterback, I'm taking Blake Bortles."
Ron Jaworski, ESPN.com: "I give him a 10. I think he smelled a little blood in the water considering (Louisville quarterback Teddy) Bridgewater had a subpar day."
Richie Incognito, free agent: "I hope I'm on the team that drafts him so I can F*** his girlfriend!! YAAAAHHH, MORE GOLDSCHLAGER!!!!"
Ok, one of those quotes is fabricated.
Nonetheless, add in some Mayock gushing to McShay's and Jaworski's, along with all of the dots everyone seems to want to connect between Bortles, his head coach George O'Leary, and the Texans coaching staff (Bill O'Brien and QB coach George Godsey both learned the ropes under O'Leary.), and it's probably an appropriate time to adjust the Texans' Tracker, as clearly Bortles is "STOCK WAY THE HELL UP" for everyone right now.
(SIDE BAR: I'm disappointed in how badly the Internet in general has underplayed Bortles' bald spot. Is nobody worried that he might actually be like 34 years old? I mean, how much do we know about this Bortles character, anyway? Does the bald spot cancel out the hot girlfriend? The bald spot doesn't even have a fake Twitter account yet! See, this is my kind of analysis.)
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SHOW ME HOW
So now T-minus seven days until Johnny Manziel's Pro Day. Somehow, I don't think the experts are going to be as effusive in their praise of Johnny Football. Hell, Merril Hoge has already started practicing is hatred...
— Merril Hoge (@merrilhoge) March 19, 2014
Pro Days, y'all!