We are celebrating tonight in Texas. Everyone around us -- except New Mexico, and who counts New Mexico? -- is fatter than a heifer convention, while we here in the Lone Star State are svelte, health-conscious model types.
In fact, you're looking a little thin out there. Go ahead, get the triple bacon on that Whataburger double-cheeseburger. It's not like you're living in Louisiana or something.
The South leads the list of states where at least 30 percent of the population is officially obese, according to a report today from the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention.
We're in the styling aisle, in the 20-29.9 percent category. We're pretty sure our percentage of obese population is probably 20.000000000001, but we're not going to ask.
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Colorado was the only state below 20 percent (the District of Columbia was, too), but we're sure that's a misprint.
The CDCP did break things down a bit by region and ethnicity:
The highest rates were found among non-Hispanic blacks overall, whose rate was 36.8%, and non-Hispanic black women, whose rate was 41.9%. The rate for Hispanics was 30.7%, and the rate among all non-high school graduates was 32.9%. In addition, the obesity rate was higher in some regions of the country than others. Midwesterners had a rate of 28.2% and residents of the South were at 28.4%.
Like we said, it's time to celebrate. Milkshakes and fried cheese for everybody!!