If I ever get a spot on American Idol, I'm set. Forget my breathy vocals -- I've got my moves down. And it's all thanks to Nick Lachey. I'm standing at the foot of the stage at Warehouse Live, where hundreds of ladies (and a few dudes) are screaming for Nick. Pushing his yet-to-be-titled new album, he's attending a birthday bash for 104 KRBE's Atom Smasher and Maria Todd morning-show team. I'm here because I was hoping for a little face-time with him. I've got questions: How's single life been post-Jessica? What's the word on his upcoming sitcom, He Said, She Said? Does he know people still think his last name is pronounced "LAY-shee"? Oh, and did he throw up in his mouth every time Jessica informed him that she had to "drop the kids off at the pool" on Newlyweds?
Sadly, Nick's people aren't granting any interviews, and despite having, like, ten wristbands on, I don't have the wristband that allows me backstage for a photo op. But I am granted tip-o'-the-stage access for his show.
After the introduction, the shrieks begin, and Nicholas Scott Lachey walks on stage wearing a black Triumph T-shirt and blue jeans. For a guy pushing 33, he looks every bit the boy-band dude that he was in 98 Degrees. He's a little shorter than I'd imagined (most celebs are), but you can see the muscles bulging under the sleeves of his tee. I can't say I'm a fan of his music, but I am a fan of his stage act. I could learn something from this guy. Watching closely, I spot three key moves:
The Point, Grab and Pull
University of Houston Cougars Football vs. Louisville Cardinals College Football
TicketsThu., Nov. 17, 7:00pm
Rice University Owls Football vs. UTEP Miner Football
TicketsSat., Nov. 19, 11:00am
SWAC Football Championship
TicketsSat., Dec. 3, 3:00pm
TicketsSat., Jan. 7, 7:00pm
As he smoothly strolls the stage, Nick breaks into his single "What's Left of Me." As he belts out the line "Will you take what's left?" women (and I think one dude, too) leap forward and indeed try to take what's left of him. Then, it comes: He points to the crowd, grabs a fist of air, pulls his hand back in and slowly pulls it down. Man, that's convincing.
The "Damn, It's Hot in Here"
Nick doesn't shake it like his brother, Drew, who won it all on Dancing with the Stars. But dude, he doesn't have to -- he's freaking Nick Lachey. He stops in the middle of a line to wipes the sweat from his face. It works -- the crowd is in a frenzy.
For his big single "Resolution," he busts out a stool. Sitting there singing about moving on, he looks vulnerable, sincere and...comfortable. Women are melting. The show's over, and driving away, I make a resolution, too: I gotta get a stool.
Get the This Week's Top Stories Newsletter
Every week we collect the latest news, music and arts stories — along with film and food reviews and the best things to do this week — so that you'll never miss Houston Press' biggest stories.