Things We'd Like to Buy With the $58 Million Katy ISD Is Spending on a Second Football Stadium

Rhodes Stadium
Rhodes Stadium
Katy ISD

So, in case you haven't heard, Katy ISD is about to spend $58 million bucks building a massive new 12,000-seat football stadium. It will be the second football stadium for the district, and will be built right across from Rhodes Stadium, which already seats 9,768 people.

While we understand the importance high school football has with Texans, that's still a ton of high school football dough.

But as expensive as that seems to us, it's still less than the $69.5 million in stadium funds they were shooting for in last year's bond package. The district didn't rally enough support for that controversial bond amount, though, and the measure failed, presumably because the construction of that more expensive stadium accounted for about 70 percent of the package.

Shaving that cool $11 mil off the price tag apparently did the trick to pass this year's bond package, though, which squeaked by with approval from 55 percent of voters last month, despite vocal opposition from parts of the community.

Katy ISD has already backed two firms for consideration on the construction, which will have room for 4,000 cars and will also inexplicably be built opposite Rhodes -- which, may we reiterate, is the other Katy stadium.

So whatever. Katy's getting a new stadium, and it's not that much of a surprise. Katy football is huge in the community, and if $58 million is going to be spent, chances are it's going toward football.

But while those Katy folks may be sorta okay with that big price tag, we couldn't help but think of all the cool stuff we could have bought with those millions. Like, a flux capacitor or a fleet of airplanes, and all of the great things below.

Things We'd Like to Buy With the $58 Million Katy ISD Is Spending on a Second Football Stadium

We could have bought most of Reddit. Yep, for a mere $50 million, we could have handed those Redditors the entire freaking amount of money they just raised in investments, and would have had control of all the gold. All of it. Think of how many +1's we could have given ourselves. Front page all day, e'ryday.

"1962 Ferrari 250 GTO 34 2"
"1962 Ferrari 250 GTO 34 2"
Licensed under CC BY-SA 3.0 via Wikimedia Commons

There's always that super expensive 1963 Ferrari 250 GTO. So if we're going to spend money on useless items like a spare football stadium, why not spend it on a freaking ridiculously expensive car instead? After all, not only is this 1962 Ferrari 250 GTO a collector's dream, but it will also run you like $52 million. That leaves $6 million to toss out the window at people. Don't make it drizzle; make it rain.

Or how about a superyacht? Everyone needs a superyacht. A $50 million dollar yacht makes about as much sense as building an extra stadium right across from your current stadium, so why not just go out and buy a superyacht with that $50 million instead? There's probably tax on those things, so chances are it'll wipe out your entire bankroll, but it's fine. You'll have something called a superyacht, and all your Katy friends will be jealous.

 

You could buy Michael Jordan's Chicago home, and probably also Michael Jordan. After all, the dude's 56,000-square-foot, nine-bedroom, 15-full-bath, four-half-bath mansion in Chicago's Highland Park is being auctioned off in mid-December after it failed to sell while priced at $21 million, so you can probably get that humble abode for a steal. And maybe Jordan will cut you a lifelong friendship deal or something for the other tens of millions that are burning a hole in your pocket.

There's also the option to buy literally everything in the 2014 Neiman Marcus Fantasy Gift Catalog. You can't get much fancier than the Academy Awards package or the Bentley, now can you? Makes about as much sense as 4,000 parking spaces at a high school football stadium, anyway.

Hell, why not just buy 7 Maybach Exeleros? They're only about $8 million each, so there's plenty of football money there for at least seven of them, which will even leave you with some cash left over for that premium gas you'll need for all those cars. Plus, Birdman totally bought a very expensive Maybach Exelero recently. You don't want to be out-balled by Birdman, do you?

Things We'd Like to Buy With the $58 Million Katy ISD Is Spending on a Second Football Stadium
Beyoncé Fifth Studio Album Cover

Why not book 58 private Beyoncé concerts? They're only a million bucks each, and since there's already a freaking Katy football stadium in existence, you could even hold your private concerts there. All 58 of them. (That's a lot of Bootylicious, by the way. A lot of Bootylicious.)

And, if we're just going to throw away money like it ain't no thing, there's always the world's most expensive necklace. Every girl needs a $55 million necklace. Every single one. With that football money, it would be possible to purchase this 637-carat total weight L'Incomparable diamond necklace, made from rose gold, which has a centerpiece diamond that clocks in at 407.48-carats.

That massive Fancy Deep brownish-yellow shield step-cut diamond is the largest internally flawless diamond ever graded by GIA, and it's surrounded by 229.52 carats of diamonds, including 35 rough diamonds, 27 pear-shaped diamonds, nine heart-shaped diamonds, five emerald-cut diamonds, five cushion-cut diamonds, four oval-shaped diamonds, three Asscher-cut diamonds and two radiant-cut diamonds.

So yeah. While Katy is out there building a second football stadium, we'd use that money to buy diamonds, Michael Jordan's 56,000-square-foot house or Beyoncé, all of which sound like way better deals.


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