Throwback Units: Ten Other Vintage Cop Car Designs HPD Should Consider
HPD once chose a 1975 Gremlin as its patrol car.
Everybody wants to go retro. From throwback uniforms in professional sports to '80s hipster hairdos, everybody is kicking it old school. Cars are not all that different. Dodge reinvented the Charger, the Volkswagen Beetle got reissued a few years back and we assume a reset of the El Camino is on the way.
Even the Houston Police Department is getting in on the action, going a little retro with their new black and white (cliché much?) patrol cars and uniforms that are going to replace the light (or is it Columbia?) blue bad boys we've seen around these parts for years. Maybe they finally got over the Oilers leaving for Tennessee. Maybe they are hinting to the Rockets that the old ketchup and mustard jerseys need to come back permanently. Whatever the case, I got to thinking there must be some other options for throwback patrol cars. Here are ten.
10. The General Lee
Okay, it's a bit ostentatious, but it has the rebel flag, which should go over GREAT in a city as culturally diverse as Houston, it has the Astro retro orange and, best of all, that horn that plays Dixie. I'd much rather hear that coming outside my window at 4 a.m. than the familiar siren.
9. Dragnet Police Car
Rice Owls Football vs. Army West Point
TicketsSat., Oct. 7, 5:30pm
Houston Texans vs. Kansas City Chiefs
TicketsSun., Oct. 8, 7:30pm
Houston Texans vs. Cleveland Browns
TicketsSun., Oct. 15, 12:00pm
TicketsSat., Oct. 21, 7:00pm
Rice Owls Football vs. LA Tech
TicketsSat., Oct. 28, 2:30pm
When HPD is looking for the facts (ma'am), there is no more understated ride to do it in than the classic Dragnet car. It helped Sgt. Joe Friday keep an even keel, which could help reduce incidents of police brutality.
8. Mayberry R.F.D. Cruiser
Oh, man, how cool would HPD officers look rolling around town in Ford Galaxies? They could stop by Aunt Bea's for coffee, except it's now a drug shack filled with face-eating bath salts addicts.
7. Bandit's Trans Am
Smokey turns the tables on the criminals!
6. Jim Rockford's Firebird Esprit
More than the car, what they need is a theme song like that one and his hip-for-the-'70s answering machine. 5. Pontiac LeMans Commandeered by "Popeye" Doyle
HPD cops could pretend to be Gene Hackman's badass character in The French Connection when behind the wheel of this bad boy that was key to one of the greatest car chase scenes in film history.
4. Magnum PI's Ferrari 308
No one and I mean NO ONE is getting away from the police if they are hauling ass in this mean machine. If they can bring back the porn 'stache, too, all the better!
3. The Starsky and Hutch Ford Gran Torino
Has there ever been a more badass cop car than the Gran Torino? Hell no.
2. The Blues Brothers Bluesmobile
It used to be a cop car anyway, and it can drive through a mall like a hot knife through butter, which could come in handy. Plus, being on a mission from God never hurt anybody.
1. Back to the Future Delorean
Stop crime before it happens by going back in time and damn the repercussions to the timeline, Doc Brown!
Get the ICYMI: Today's Top Stories Newsletter Our daily newsletter delivers quick clicks to keep you in the know
Catch up on the day's news and stay informed with our daily digest of the most popular news, music, food and arts stories in Houston, delivered to your inbox Monday through Friday.