TMZ: Dwight Howard "Blows More Reds Than Communist Hooker"

Howard is seeing red...lights. What?
Howard is seeing red...lights. What?
Photo by Jeff Balke

Houston Rockets center Dwight Howard is a happy, free-spirited guy to go with his tremendous talent on the court. He is also, apparently, a scofflaw, at least in Florida. According to a report by TMZ, Howard recently had his Florida license suspended for multiple traffic violations, mostly running red lights.

Red-light cameras -- those things we see all over Houston that pissed off Houstonians so much that they were rescinded, but the equipment remains atop our intersections because government -- caught Howard running lights nine times in ten months beginning in 2012 and once more in 2014 for a total of ten violations. Court records indicate he paid for nine of the tickets, but the one outstanding ticket -- for a whopping $285 -- is outstanding, triggering the suspension.

Reuters reports these aren't the only moving violations on Howard's Florida rap sheet, which include four speeding tickets, 12 citations for failing to pay highway tolls (there are a LOT of toll roads in Florida) and one for failing to change the address on his license. All of these fines were paid. Frankly, that last one sounds like something the Orlando government trumped up when he went to the Lakers, but I'm just spitballing.

If Howard can muster that $285 fine, he can return to his good-citizen ways. According to Forbes, Howard is the eighth highest earning NBA player, slated to make an estimated $26.5 million in 2014, $20.5 million of which will be paid by the Rockets. Something tells me he would find 300 bucks tucked into the cushions of his sofa, so fear not, Rockets fans, there shouldn't be an outstanding warrant for your center when the Rockets visit Orlando on October 22 for their penultimate preseason game.

In essence, this is the kind of non-story that the off-season routinely brings when there's not much else to discuss before training camp opens. With all the Rockets excitement having died down when Chris Bosh and Chandler Parsons went dark side on us back in July, Howard running red lights is the best we can do.

But TMZ decided to take it up a notch with one of the funnier and more interesting headlines in recent memory, saying Howard "blows more reds than communist hooker." Pay attention, young copy editors. This is how you spice up a boring news cycle.


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