Tear-away jerseys, the XFL and concussion-causing headhunters aren't things we miss about football.
We pine for these ten items.
10. Uniforms That Don't Suck This mostly applies to college football, where repeat offenders Oregon were joined by Georgia, Ohio State, Maryland and Syracuse (pictured) in wearing dumb stuff.
9. Neck Rolls The ivory-colored, sausage-shaped foam protectors behind a player's neck were supposed to prevent whiplash. Always seemed more of a fashion statement for folks like Eric Dickerson and Chris Spielman.
8. Good Announcers Pretty much every game ever is televised, which means a watered-down crew of broadcast journalism and communication graduates are on the microphone vomiting clichés. College announcers on Fox Sports Net and talking heads on CBS for pros are especially lame.
7. Football on Baseball Diamonds This still happens for a month-plus in Oakland and Miami, but they're the last of the multipurpose-field era.
6. One-Bar Face Masks Not always window dressing for the face for kickers and punters, quarterbacks such as Doug Flutie and Joe Theismann (right) donned this look. Unless you had been grandfathered in, you couldn't wear the single-bar mask starting with the 2004 NFL season.
5. Pennants Will always always trump car flags and Fatheads.
4. For Quarterbacks: Huddles, Under Center and Calling Own Plays Peyton Manning's long-term injury this season means that one less QB is doing three things that used to be standard in the game.
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3. Bowl Games in Their Actual Stadiums The Orange Bowl is played at Sun Life Stadium and the Cotton Bowl at Cowboys Stadium. Just give it some time for the Liberty Bowl and the Sun Bowl to go away or move to less-charming digs. If the Rose Bowl ever departs Pasadena, fold college football immediately.
2. Football Cards Topps and Upper Deck still issue compact cardboard art, but the sound design and mystique of the collectible items are long gone.
1. Astroturf Yeah, it's an eyesore/playsore, but it's a Houston/Texas export!