Turkeys Of The Past: 2003 Edition
We're about a week away from the always highly anticipated Turkey of the Year award issue. There's absolutely no telling who will walk away with the coveted honor this year, because for the love of Christ there have been a ton of worthy nominees.
It's our seventh annual list; in the days leading up to it we'll go on a bit of a nostalgic trip to days of yore.
Today: 2003!! The first list of all!!
We could put in a link to it, but we want to see if you can remember that glorious year's picks without clicking or Googling. Prize: None.
Battle of the Piney Woods: SFA vs. SHSU
TicketsSat., Oct. 1, 3:00pm
University of Houston Cougars Football vs. Tulsa Golden Hurricane Football
TicketsSat., Oct. 15, 11:00am
Rice University Owls Football vs. UTSA Roadrunners Football
TicketsSat., Oct. 15, 6:00pm
Rice University Owls Football vs. Prairie View A&M University Football
TicketsSat., Oct. 22, 2:30pm
1. This overall winner has gone on to be the most-honored person ever. What Edith Head was to the Oscars, he/she is to the Turkeys.
a) Tom DeLay
b) Tom DeLay
c) Tom DeLay
d) Anyone other than Tom DeLay
2. Why did Houston state senator John Whitmire win an award that year?
a) Something about cell phones and TDCJ inmates
b) Cratering in a holdout over DeLay's redistricting scheme, in which 11 Democratic senators left the state to camp out in Oklahoma and New Mexico
c) Explaining he had done so because "I've just always really wanted the nickname 'John Quitmire,' and I finally figured out how to get it"
d) Continually playing OutKast's "Hey Ya" on the Senate floor
3. Municipal Judge Roxane Martinez made the list for:
a) Telling a defendant "You're guilty -- of looking damn sexy."
b) Using a city computer to jump on the big trend of 2003, updating your MySpace page
c) Getting into a fight at an eastside dancehall
d) For writing an elegantly written but misguided defense of the sixth amendment
4. The Sports Turkey of the year came from:
a) The Astros
b) The Rockets
c) The Comets
d) No one; all of Houston's teams and players performed impeccably that year.
Ah, what the hell. Don;t wrack yer brain. Here's the link with the answers.
Get the This Week's Top Stories Newsletter
Every week we collect the latest news, music and arts stories — along with film and food reviews and the best things to do this week — so that you'll never miss Houston Press' biggest stories.