As part of their pretty sweet deal to clear their names in the Morton Ranch High cheerleader-hazing scandal, those spunky gals who bound and blindfolded classmates and threw them in a pool were ordered to write apology letters.
The letters, which should wash away the terror of being hogtied and thrown blind into deep water, are to be printed in local newspapers.
The Katy Times has received its first one -- from the Morton Ranch mascot. (She is, fittingly, a "Maverick.")
You have to love any apology that ends with "Go Mavericks!", so here it is:
To my fellow students:
I want to publicly apologize for the events that occurred with the junior varsity girls. apologize to the junior varsity girls and to their parents.
I have a lot of time to think about that night now and I have been reminded and have re-learned some important lessons that I would like to share:
1. It is important to be honest.
2. It is important to treat each other with respect.
3. It is important for older students to set a good example for younger students.
4. It is important for all students to show respect for each other.
5. It is important for all students to remember that we are all on the same team.
6. It is important for all of us to think things through before we act.
7. It is important to be sensitive to the feelings of others.
8. It is important to remember hazing of any fellow student is never acceptable.
I am proud to go to Morton Ranch. I am proud to be a Maverick and I wish everyone a good year ahead. Go Mavericks!
It is important to remember a lot of things. Like keeping your probation officer happy.
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SHOW ME HOW
Update: It's not the first!! We somehow missed this heartwarming missive, which includes the ever-popular "sorry if you were offended" trope:
To whom it may concern:
I would like to respectfully apologize to anyone who may have been offended.
This apology goes out to especially the Junior Varsity squad members and parents. Any actions that took place on July 25, 2008 make me feel terribly sorry.
Regretfully, I have had to learn lessons in a very difficult way. It has been educational for me and I have learned to use better judgment. I love the Junior Varisty squad members. I have always been kind to each and every one of them and will continue to do so. I pray for everyone involved and will continue to do so.
Hayley Spincer Davis
She has "always been kind to each and every one of them"? We guess. Except for that whole throwing-in-the-pool thing.
-- Richard Connelly