Subject:

Ben Roethlisberger

  • Blogs

    December 27, 2013

    One Fool's 2014 Houston Sports Predictions

    With 2013 giving way to 2014, it's time for a few predictions that will, more than likely, be way off the mark. But what the hell, that means I'll be just like the rest of my sportswriting brethren. So... PREDICTION ONE: CSN HOUSTON The next status conference in bankruptcy court before Judge Marv ... More >>

  • Blogs

    October 8, 2013

    Finally, Gary Kubiak Is Right. It's on Him.

    In between not one but two live NFL games on Sunday night and one cross-country flight on Monday, I had plenty of time these last couple of days to think about the current state of the Houston Texans. And as they sit amid the charred, barely recyclable remnants of what was, at one time, viable Supe ... More >>

  • Blogs

    July 12, 2013

    Let's Go Shopping At The Texans Clearance Sale!

    A few years ago, my kids were visiting from Chicago in the summertime, and we decided to head up to Dallas, for two reasons: 1. Eat lunch at the new-to-Dallas-but-an-old-friend-to-my-digestive-tract In-N-Out Burger 2. Take a tour of the still-fairly-new Cowboys Stadium, a/k/a "Jerry World" After ... More >>

  • Blogs

    June 24, 2013

    Life Lessons From Tony Soprano: Aaron Hernandez Sucks At Murder

    In Season 2 of The Sopranos, Christopher begins his ascent up the Soprano family "corporate" ladder by running (ruining?) a local stock brokerage for the sole purpose of artificially inflating the price of shares of some select companies (Webistics!). Along the way, he picks up a couple of flunkies ... More >>

  • Blogs

    March 4, 2013

    Joe Flacco Has A New Contract: Next Big Thing Or Next Cautionary Tale?

    On December 16, the Baltimore Ravens lost their third game in a row, 34-17 to the Denver Broncos in Baltimore to drop to 9-5 on the season and virtually clinch a relatively ho-hum four seed in the AFC. On that day, their starting quarterback, Joe Flacco, completed 20 passes on 40 attempts for 254 l ... More >>

  • Blogs

    January 16, 2013

    Good, Not Great: Why Texans Need A Daryl Morey Approach To QB Position

    If good is the enemy of great, the Texans are in a lot of trouble as they map out a plan to break through their second-round ceiling. Owner Bob McNair and head coach Gary Kubiak are publically saying the happy, feel-good things. "We're very close," McNair said after the loss in New England, while K ... More >>

  • Blogs

    December 28, 2012

    Things We Learned from the Vince Young Outside The Lines Feature

    Since falling out of favor with the Tennessee Titans in 2010, Vince Young's slide to the bottom of the quarterback food chain has been precipitous and eventful. The highlights include: - Backing up Michael Vick in Philadelphia in 2011 and pronouncing the Eagles a "Dream Team," a hex on that franchi ... More >>

  • Blogs

    November 14, 2012

    Monday Night Football Cavalcade Of Errors, Starring Rick Reilly!

    Something amazing happened last night during ESPN's coverage of the Pittsburgh Steelers' 16-13 overtime atrocity win over the lowly Kansas City Chiefs on Monday night. It wasn't the Chiefs' miraculously hanging well within the 12 point spread on this game (obliterating degenerate teaser bets every ... More >>

  • Blogs

    January 6, 2012

    Texans, Saints and Tebow! This Weekend's NFL Playoff Best Bets

    PLAYOFFS?!?!!? Oh, yeah​So is Houston ready for some playoff football? How about we go through the Reliant Stadium checklist for Saturday's game with the Bengals to find out. Notifications to season ticket holders to be in their seats 30 minutes before kickoff? Check. Colored placards in sea ... More >>

  • Blogs

    October 4, 2011

    Getting Right Again at Darkhorse

    ​Sunday drinking can be as much of a palliative as it is a worthwhile activity in its own right, and Bloody Marys, despite the massive amounts of salt, are the standard alcoholic treatment for over-consumption. Whoever invented them - and there are a couple theories - is a candidate for booze ... More >>

  • Blogs

    October 3, 2011

    Texans 17, Steelers 10: No Longer Bullied, These Texans Are The Bullies

    See more pics from the Texans' third win in our slideshow. Led by a dynamic running game and relentless pass rush, the Texans beat and bullied defending AFC champion Pittsburgh to the point that Ben Roethlisberger compared the Texans to the Ravens. Wait, what? "That defense is physical," Roethlis ... More >>

  • Blogs

    September 19, 2011

    Texans 23, Dolphins 13: Balanced Effort Exorcises Road Demons

    Andre Johnson: Good hands.​The long-standing reputation for the Gary Kubiak-era Texans has been that they fold under pressure. When teams hit them, they rarely hit back. They don't finish the job, especially on the road. In the season's second week, the Texans took yet another step toward exo ... More >>

  • Blogs

    September 9, 2011

    Texans-Colts: Five Things to Watch

    No Peyton, no chance.​With Peyton Manning out for Sunday's opener and potentially the entire year after undergoing a second surgery on his neck, the narrative for Houston changes from a statement game to one of trends. That is, there should be no way to actually lose, or for the final score t ... More >>

  • Blogs

    September 8, 2011

    2011 NFL Preview, Spoken In Wagering-ese

    The betting window is open​I hope everyone who has had a chance to check out our Texans 2011 preview "The New Normal" has enjoyed it. Big ups to Monica Fuentes for coming up with the season-long interactive game card tracking Texans' results. You need to go check it out. If you haven't read ... More >>

  • Blogs

    April 21, 2011

    My 2011 Texans Schedule Analysis -- Praying For A Long Work Stoppage

    Skip this if you can. (The movie AND the Texans' opening schedule)​Destination programming. It's the lifeblood of any organization whose goal is to entertain the masses. It doesn't matter if you're a television network, an independent radio station, or a professional sports league. If you ... More >>

  • Blogs

    March 3, 2011

    Medical Alert: Alcohol Is Turning Our Celebrities into Anti-Semites

    How drunk celebrities see the world​Time was, a celebrity with negative opinions about "ze Jews" could opine about the threat they posed to Western culture until he/she was blue in the face, and many did (Henry Ford and Charles Lindbergh, to name a couple). Then World War II and the Holocaust ... More >>

  • Blogs

    February 9, 2011

    Mark Sanchez Is Not Very Smart

    Mark Sanchez: He's got a prom date​Hilary Rhoda. Lindsay McCormick. Jennifer Mueller. Google "Mark Sanchez girlfriend" and these are the first handful of supermodel hot women linked to the New York Jets quarterback. At least they were until this morning. Now you need to wade through a half d ... More >>

  • Blogs

    February 8, 2011

    From Bad to Worse: Dallas Gives Michael Vick a Key to the City

    Dallas honors Michael Vick, for some unfathomable reason​It has not been an easy week for the city of Dallas. It started with a "once in twenty years"-ish, weeklong snow and ice storm during the one week that Dallas could least afford a snow and ice storm. It continued with sheets of said ... More >>

  • Blogs

    February 7, 2011

    Super Bowl XLV -- At Least It Was A Good Game

    This means sonething different when Ben Roethlisberger does it​Okay, so now we can put the whole Brett Favre/Aaron Rodgers thing to bed, right? While Aaron Rodgers still has a ton of work to do to build the overall resume of the Ol' Dongslinger, yesterday's win over the Steelers, and just as ... More >>

  • Blogs

    February 7, 2011

    Christina Aguilera's National Anthem: Better Than Carl Lewis', Anyway

    ​Today, Super Bowl MVP Aaron Rodgers and the Green Bay Packers are presumably on their way to Disney World, the Pittsburgh Steelers are praying Ben Roethlisberger did not do anything in the many, many strip clubs of the greater Metroplex to bring on a repeat of his season-opening four-game sus ... More >>

  • News

    February 3, 2011

    Jerry's Time to Shine

    Speaking truth about Super Bowl XXXVIII.

  • Blogs

    February 3, 2011

    25 Super Bowl Pregame Observations

    Brooklyn Decker, Super Bowl media correspondent​The weather outside might suck really, really bad right now. But it's time to be reminded that more important things are going on this week. It's Super Bowl week, and we're lucky to have the NFL visiting the Metroplex which, on Sunday, at Jerry ... More >>

  • Blogs

    January 27, 2011

    Is A Hit Rap Song The Texans' Key To The Super Bowl?

    ​Want a worthy Super Bowl pick? In the words of Wesley Snipes in 1992's Passenger 57, "Always bet on black," ... and yellow. Don't thank Rocks Off for that profitable betting tip. Thank Wiz Khalifa, who is going to bring glory back to his frigid blue-collar hometown of Pittsburgh. It's only ... More >>

  • Blogs

    January 17, 2011

    NFL Conference Title Games: Douche-apalooza 2011!

    This is not Roger Staubach​Ben Roethlisberger, Mark Sanchez, Jay Cutler, Aaron Rodgers. In an era where success in the NFL has never been more tied to quarterback play, those are your last four quarterbacks standing in the 2011 Playoffs. Most NFL fans see the elimination and subsequent absen ... More >>

  • Blogs

    December 30, 2010

    Dogging Michael Vick

    Ladies and gentlemen, your Dancing With the Stars 11th runner-up.​I guess someone got tired of playing third fiddle to Sean Hannity and Bill O'Reilly: While setting up a segment on President Obama's recent telephone call to Jeffrey Lurie, the owner of the Philadelphia Eagles (wherein the pres ... More >>

  • Blogs

    November 29, 2010

    Texans 20, Titans 0: Andre Punctuates Big Win With Knockout Blow

    Marco TorresAndre Johnson (left) was ejected from the game after a fistfight with Titans player Cortland Finnegan. See more photos from the game in our slideshow.​For the first time in four weeks, the Texans left someone other than themselves and their fans feeling the effects of a punch. In ... More >>

  • Blogs

    November 29, 2010

    Houston Texans -- Cortland Finnegan Is A Punk Ass Bitch

    Down goes Finnegan!! Down goes Finnegan!!​''I want to apologize to the organization, our owner and my teammates. What happened out there today wasn't me. I just lost my cool. I wish I could take back what happened. I can't. It's over and done with now. I'm pretty sure I'll be disciplined. I'll ... More >>

  • Blogs

    October 14, 2010

    College Football and NFL: Weekend's Best Bets (One Day Early)

    Brett Favre: Readying the "elbow tendonitis" excuse?​If you're keeping score at home, it was not a pretty week for society. In no particular order, in the last seven days, the following occurred: -- Much like the self-handling of his own Johnson (and we have the pictures to prove it), Brett Favre ... More >>

  • Blogs

    September 24, 2010

    Houston Texans -- F the Cowboys (or #FDACOWBOYS on Twitter)

    cutline​Not long ago, I got into a brief discussion on Twitter with another radio personality whom I am forbidden to name whose name I don't exactly recall. I don't remember the crux of the tweet-versation (something having to do with blogs and the inherent evil that blogs possess to anyone over ... More >>

  • Blogs

    September 15, 2010

    LeBron James -- Society Hates You, I Love Society

    LeBron: The power is waning​Mankind, I have to say that I was just about to give up on you. I'm a very patient person, but with every kid running around in a Ben Roethlisberger jersey or every nimrod that decides to turn right on Hamilton at the Texas Street intersection next to Minute Maid Park ... More >>

  • Blogs

    September 3, 2010

    Game Time: Houston Texans -- 5 Winners, 5 Losers

    Dan Orlovsky faces the press​The Reliant Stadium sprawl of empty seats, the equally sparsely populated press box, the rare ease with which one could navigate pregame traffic -- all those things would seemingly indicate that the Texans final preseason game in 2010 against the Tampa Buccaneers was m ... More >>

  • Blogs

    July 1, 2010

    Game Time: Michael Vick -- Why Can't You Just Be A Schnook Like The Rest Of Us?

    Trouble just seems to find him​"As far back as I can remember, I've always wanted to be a gangster." -- Henry Hill at the beginning of Goodfellas, when it was all about greed, excess, and privilege"Today, everything is different. There's no action. I have to wait around like everyone else. C ... More >>

  • Blogs

    June 14, 2010

    Game Time: Vince Young -- All He Does Is Win, Strip-Club Fistfight Edition

    VY in happier times​Okay, I give up. The topic of college football conference realignment has dominated the airwaves/Twitter/blog chatter the past two weeks, all the while the NBA Finals and now the 2010 World Cup whirring judiciously in the background.College football has taken a couple run ... More >>

  • Blogs

    May 7, 2010

    Game Time: Lawrence Taylor -- We Liked You A Lot Better When All You Did Was Sack Quarterbacks And Snort Blow

    You can't say you weren't warned when it comes to LT​There's a scene at the very beginning of the Tom Cruise hit film Jerry Maguire where superagent Maguire is shown adeptly handling all of the day-to-day duties that come with his territory. Wooing potential new clients, securing sponsorship deals ... More >>

  • Blogs

    May 3, 2010

    Bun B Joins Gumball 3000 Rally; Nirvana Chopped And Screwed

    Welcome back to Turning the Screw, Rocks Off's weekly rap post. It probably won't rhyme, at least most of the time. E-mail tips to introducingliston@gmail.com. Thanks, homies. Mark C. AustinNosaprise at the 2009 Houston Press Music Awards Showcase​ Single of the Week: "Start Today," Nosaprise Wire ... More >>

  • Blogs

    April 15, 2010

    Game Time: Roger Goodell To Decide If He Can Punish More Stupidity

    This is why they pay Roger Goodell the big bucks. For a commissioner who quickly gained a reputation as a strict disciplinarian after taking over for Paul Tagliabue in August 2006 by throwing suspensions at his league's miscreants like so many nickels and dimes, the decision he makes regarding pun ... More >>

  • Blogs

    April 14, 2010

    Glee: Highway to Hell-O

    ​ We're over the halfway point in Glee's inaugural season, having just overcome a three-month hiatus following the New Directions' (the William McKinley High School glee club) victory at sectionals. The last episode ended on such a high note -- the club triumphant, Will and Emma together at ... More >>

  • Blogs

    April 14, 2010

    Glee: Highway To Hell-O

    ​ We're over the halfway point in Glee's inaugural season, having just overcome a three-month hiatus following the New Directions' (the William McKinley High School glee club) victory at sectionals. The last episode ended on such a high note -- the club triumphant, Will and Emma together at ... More >>

  • Blogs

    April 13, 2010

    Game Time: Best-Case NFL Draft Scenario For HBO's Hard Knocks Fans

    ​In the end, I guess someone had to go. If you're the front office of a proud franchise like the Steelers, you can only have so many impromptu press conferences, district attorney explanations, and women screaming foul before a message needs to get sent. You're not going to move the star quarte ... More >>

  • Blogs

    April 7, 2010

    The Aeros Matt Kassian: Enforcer On The Ice, Humanitarian Off It

    Photo courtesy Houston Aeros​It's no secret that the season has long been over for the Houston Aeros. And a March slump all but eliminated the team from the playoffs when just one short winning streak might have kept them in contention. But there have still been games to play, and after last night ... More >>

  • Blogs

    January 21, 2010

    Game Time: Come! Watch The Amazing Vince Young Water Down Matt Schaub's Pro Bowl Bid!

    ​For better or worse, the Texans are still at a stage in their history where they are experiencing some "exciting but for most teams not really extraordinary" things for the first time. This will happen when the first four years of your eight-year existence were spent being constructed by Char ... More >>

  • Blogs

    December 28, 2009

    Game Time: Texans Playoff Rooting Manifesto 3.0..."Jim Caldwell Sucks" Edition

    ​There will be no need for 2,000 words to explain the various permutations of things that need to happen this week for the Texans to make the 2009 NFL Playoffs. Thanks to the various dominoes falling yesterday, heading into Week 17, the following scenario needs to play out:-- Texans beat the Patri ... More >>

  • Blogs

    January 30, 2009

    Super Bowl XLIII Preview

    So I'm supposed to write a Super Bowl preview. But just what can I write about the Super Bowl that hasn't already been written elsewhere? If you want some stats, I can tell you that, in the regular season the Cardinals were fourth in the NFL in points per game (26.7) and total yards per game (36 ... More >>

  • Blogs

    January 30, 2009

    Super Bowl XLIII Preview

    So I'm supposed to write a Super Bowl preview. But just what can I write about the Super Bowl that hasn't already been written elsewhere? If you want some stats, I can tell you that, in the regular season the Cardinals were fourth in the NFL in points per game (26.7) and total yards per game (36 ... More >>

  • Blogs

    January 27, 2009

    25 Super Bowl Memes You'll Be Sick Of

    It's Super Bowl week. The game is on Sunday, but by the time kickoff rolls around we're going to be so sick of the hype that nobody is going to care about the game. The memes have started coalescing, so here's a little primer for every storyline that you will be sick of come Thursday evening once ... More >>

  • Blogs

    January 27, 2009

    25 Super Bowl Memes You'll Be Sick Of

    It's Super Bowl week. The game is on Sunday, but by the time kickoff rolls around we're going to be so sick of the hype that nobody is going to care about the game. The memes have started coalescing, so here's a little primer for every storyline that you will be sick of come Thursday evening once ... More >>

  • Blogs

    September 8, 2008
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    April 26, 2007
  • Home Entertainment

    July 20, 2006

    Cyber Shula

    NFL Head Coach wants to make a legend out of you.

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