Chad

Zapruder Analysis of Chad Johnson's Courtroom Ass Slap (w/ VIDEO)

I don't care how funny you think you are, there are just certain times and places you don't joke around. At or near the top of the list of places that you should back-burner any playfulness or boyish antics is when a judge is in the process of going easy on you for violation of your probation in a ... More >>

Food Network Star: A Promising New Show Is A Possibility

It's that time of year once again; Food Network Star premiered Sunday at 8 p.m. for its ninth season. Last year, the three star judges, Bobby Flay, Giada De Laurentiis and Alton Brown, served as judges and mentors to the contestants they chose to be on their team. This year, however, Food Network S ... More >>

Coachella: A Tale of Two Bros

Ed. Note: Another Coachella post from our friends at West Coast Sound. It may be a bit early, but Coachella 2013 seems to be the Year of the Bro. For the ladies, it's business as usual, but the bros are really bringing it, from humorous neon T-shirts to costumes to all-around chiseledness. But th ... More >>

Top Five Things to Do in Houston Sports This Weekend: The Upper Crusty Edition

The above image is exactly what we imagine you say when you see the weekly headline announcing the best things to do in sports this weekend. You're all, "FUCK YEAH, MOTHER EFFER! IT'S TIME FOR SPORTS! WOO!" Then you read about the things we have to offer and you're all, "YEAH...wait, what?" That's ... More >>

Openings & Closings: Taco USA Takes The Woodlands

There were lots of good scoops this week from around the city, so let's get straight to the action. Eater Houston editor Eric Sandler reports that pastry chef Roy Shvartzapel -- who's worked in kitchens from El Bulli to Bouchon -- plans to open an "avant garde and modern approach to the cafe experi ... More >>

Chad (Ochocinco) Johnson Has A Sex Tape? Of Course He Does

Chad Johnson has always been one of the biggest attention whores, not just in sports, but really, well, anywhere. When he's not legally changing his last name to "Ochocinco," he's taking a stab at professional soccer for no real reason. When he's not trying to be a professional bull rider, he's film ... More >>

Saturday Night: Red Hot Chili Peppers at Toyota Center

Red Hot Chili Peppers Toyota Center October 20, 2012 The Red Hot Chili Peppers have stuck around long enough -- through drugs, overdoses, creative strife and changing musical tides -- to have 30 years of hits they can knock out into the nosebleeds at any given live show. Saturday night's Toyota C ... More >>

The Firing Of Chad "Ochocinco" Johnson, Caught On Video And Zaprudered

As promised in my Monday post wrapping up the previous weekend, a weekend that saw Dolphins wide receiver Chad Ochocinco Johnson become former Dolphins wide receiver Chad Ochocinco Johnson, I did tune in to Hard Knocks on Tuesday night to watch Johnson's final episode on the show. As I watched the ... More >>

It Is What It Is. Or Is It?

This CAMH show features plenty of good work, but it's not all worth the effort.

The Space City Beat Battle & The Best H-Town Producers Ever

Despite a venue conflict, the championship edition of the Space City Beat Battle will go on Saturday evening at the Mercury Room. If you've never been to one it's almost like watching a ritualistic rite of passage where cocksure arrogance and chest pounding reign supreme. Sample based producers who ... More >>

Marcus Manchild Finishes Out Tour in Style

Houston rapper Marcus Manchild and his label partners at AMG (Authentik Music Group), Wodie, George, Chad and Nate, just finished traveling the country as part of the Smoker's Club Tour, headlined by Method Man, Curren$y and Big K.R.I.T. The Smoker's Club tour was at Warehouse Live November 11 (read ... More >>

Marcus Manchild Reporting via Text from Magic City

Houston rapper Marcus Manchild and his label partners at AMG (Authentik Music Group), George, Chad and Nate, are currently traveling the country as part of the Smoker's Club Tour, headlined by Method Man, Curren$y and Big K.R.I.T. The Smoker's Club tour was at Warehouse Live November 11 (read the re ... More >>

Marcus Manchild Loves Scottsdale

Houston rapper Marcus Manchild and his label partners at AMG (Authentik Music Group), George, Chad and Nate, are currently traveling the country as part of the Smoker's Club Tour, headlined by Method Man, Curren$y and Big K.R.I.T. The Smoker's Club tour comes to Warehouse Live November 11, and Marcu ... More >>

Marcus Manchild Puts on a Show at KFC

Houston rapper Marcus Manchild and his label partners at AMG (Authentik Music Group), George, Chad and Wodie, are currently traveling the country as part of the Smoker's Club Tour, headlined by Method Man, Curren$y and Big K.R.I.T. The Smoker's Club tour comes to Warehouse Live November 11, and Marc ... More >>

Marcus Manchild: NYC Flips For UGK

Houston rapper Marcus Manchild and his label partners at AMG (Authentik Music Group), George, Chad and Nate, are currently traveling the country as part of the Smoker's Club Tour, headlined by Method Man, Curren$y and Big K.R.I.T. The Smoker's Club tour comes to Warehouse Live November 11, and Marcu ... More >>

Marcus Manchild Kills It In Philly On Smoker's Club Tour

Houston rapper Marcus Manchild and his label partners at AMG (Authentik Music Group), George, Chad and Nate, are currently traveling the country as part of the Smoker's Club Tour, headlined by Method Man, Curren$y and Big K.R.I.T. The Smoker's Club tour comes to Warehouse Live November 11, and Marcu ... More >>

Sampler Plate: This Week in Food Blogs

The Atlantic: In one of the most-discussed articles of the week, The Atlantic asks: "Who wants to be a career food critic anyway?" Citing mounting pressures to blog, Tweet, Facebook and perform a million other small tasks in addition to writing restaurant reviews, author Adam Martin questions if thi ... More >>

Houston Texans Game 2 -- 4 Winners, 4 Losers (And A Jennifer Lopez Appearance)

2-0! (again)​I hope everyone had a good weekend of football. I was two plays away from going 6-0 on my picks, my alma mater finally won a game and the Texans are 2-0! On the flip side, college realignment struck a blow in my home part of the country, as the Big East that I grew up with essen ... More >>

Rappers Onstage: Who's Dramatic Enough For Broadway?

Some rappers happen to be thoughtful, intelligent people. Every Monday that isn't a national holiday Rocks Off will have some of them here discussing issues relevant to their culture. Have something you've always wanted to ask a rapper? Email sheaserrano@gmail.com. Photo illustration by John Seabor ... More >>

Our All-Time Fantasy Vans Warped Tour Lineup

Photos by Marc BrubakerWarped Tour 2010​Since 1996, the Vans Warped Tour has been a staple of punk and youth culture all over the world, uniting kids of all stripes under the violent heat of the sun one day out of the year in cities across the map. The traveling festival is responisble for bre ... More >>

Hot Saturday Night

Roky Moon & BOLT release debut LP.

Your Buzzword Is My Band Name, Part 1

Friedrich Glorian via Flickr​It's a Google-rific society we be a-living in, and the fastest way to notoriety is to coin a phrase that, when Guantanamo Bayed safely between quotation marks in a search field, will bring up endless debate upon your win or fail. We have been blessed with some rea ... More >>

Beavis And Butt-Head's Greatest Video Hits, Dillhole

​On the night of November 28, 1997, Rocks Off was sitting in his friend Chad's parents' house in Pearland, watching the final episode of MTV's Beavis and Butt-head. The boys had been a part of our daily lives since at least fifth grade, and as we marched into the second semester of ninth grade ... More >>

I Wanna Be Your Dog (Or Cat): Ohmygod, We Have A Guest Blogger!!!

Our guest blogger for the week, taking time off from reality shows​As you are almost certainly aware, Houston's biggest story of the week is about socialite/reality-TV personality Erica Rose's dog giving birth to three pups.As Culturemap explains, the births were the miraculous result of a serendi ... More >>

Get In The Ring: How 7 Wrestlers Match Up With Their Rock-Star Lookalikes

​ While rock stars wrestle with their inner demons, the performers of the WWE wrestle with other people. A rock star may cut himself because he just needs to feel something; a wrestler will cut himself because it's the championship pay-per-view event and needs to look more intense. The rock stars ... More >>

"Bright" Stars

The MFAH hosts a masterfully curated show of works by 12 Korean artists.

Inquiring Minds: Chickenfoot Guitarist and "Completely Hopeless" Gearhead Joe Satriani

LeAnn Mueller​Joe Satriani is a hero to Guitar Player subscribers and a bit of an enigma to everyone else. His name is synonymous with a distinctive style of guitar playing - highly advanced fretboard wizardry, often referred to as "shredding," that draws equally from rock, metal, classical ... More >>

Houston Remembers Green Day, Back In the Day

Photos by Rachelle Mendez and Matthew Juarez​Saturday night, one of the most polarizing bands of the past 20 years rolls into town. Since its 1994 mainstream breakthrough, Dookie, Green Day has been dividing fans and critics alike. Some damned the trio for leaving their punk-rock roots behind at 9 ... More >>

Who Wants To Be A Contestant On Who Wants To Be A Millionaire?

The producers of Who Wants to Be a Millionaire are coming to town Friday today to audition contestants for the show. Our Craig Hlavaty has already gone down this road before; here's his tale and some tips on how to get picked.Back in the summer of 2005, when I was slinging dough for Domino's and stu ... More >>

Superproducer Pharrell Williams is at Home in N.E.R.D.

The Nose Knows

Radio Houstoned: African Children’s Choir on a Journey of Hope

Miss Pop Rocks Loves (the First Half of) the Oscars

African Children’s Choir

Houston’s the latest stop for the Journey of Hope tour

The Apple of Her Eye: Pimp C’s Sixth Grade Social Studies Teacher Remembers Chad Butler

Drenched In Blog: National One-Hit Wonder Day

Bet You Didn't Even Realize He Was Gone

Holy Woofer, Batman!

War Through Crayons

High Rollers

The party is tall and sexy at Forbidden City

Hanging Tough

Former New Kid on the Block Jordan Knight relives his glory days at the Sidecar Pub

How Long, Oh, Lord, How Long

Another outpost of crap plops onto the Houston dial, as this open letter reveals

Still Toxie After All These Years

Lloyd Kaufman's gross-out Troma Studios has a long history of setting the pace for mainstream movies

Invisible Man

Kenna doesn't care if you see him. He just wants you to hear him.

Stewed, Screwed and Tattooed

Getting Down and Dirty with a quintet of Houston rock purists

Reality TV Bites

Shani and Chad Walter lost one of their twin baby boys. Thanks to Houston Medical, thousands of Americans got to witness their pain.

The Great Divide

Principal Lawrence Allen is a role model to some, an inept bumbler to others. Jones High School is split: Magnet-program parents versus the local community. It's up to Superintendent Kaye Stripling to make it right. Lucky her.

Love Conflicts -- Nailing Neil

Your Friends' writer/director takes a wicked route through relationships

No Balls

In the battle of the sexes, the Company men lose

Unkind Cuts

A Month of Mutt

"That small band" Dyn@mutt pursues the weird science of Houston rock