Charlie Weis

Tim Tebow, Star Of The Omaha Beef?

Yesterday, I got an e-mail from my friend R.J. Bell, founder of wagering infotainment website pregame.com. I love getting e-mails from R.J. because they always have the gambling spin on whatever the latest sports news is. You know how some people subscribe to services that send them inspirational e- ... More >>

College Football National Signing Day: Ole Miss Signs This Year's Annual "WTF" Class

Go back and look at the historical data in the Rivals.com recruiting database, and the top ten classes each season generally include the same cast of university characters -- some permutation of USC, Florida, Oklahoma, Texas, Ohio State, Alabama, LSU, Georgia, with a generous smattering of Michigan, ... More >>

Notre Dame-Alabama: Jimmy Clausen Fires The First Salvo And Shows Why The World Hates Him

I have to say that for a potentially historical battle between two behemoth football programs with the two most bruising, physically pounding defenses in the country, the lead up thus far to the January 7 BCS Title Game between Notre Dame and Alabama has been proceeding rather softly. The captains ... More >>

Football! This Weekend's Best Bets -- "College Football Playoff, Get Here Soon" Edition

It's the first weekend of December, and you know what that means -- a slew of college football conference championship games that, to the average college football fan, mean virtually nothing. Sure, will some teams win their way into automatic bids to BCS bowls? Yes. In the spirit of...well, spirit, ... More >>

Football! This Weekend's Best Bets, Helping NBA Stars With Their Finances

To exactly nobody's surprise, the Rockets and James Harden agreed on Wednesday afternoon to a five year, $80 million contract extension, making Harden the first maximum contract player that Daryl Morey has inked to a deal in his tenure as Rockets general manager, and sending a clear message that Har ... More >>

Football! This Weekend's Best Bets And The World's Weirdest Lawsuit Victory

For this week's random person with newfound wealth via frivolous lawsuit or dumb luck, we go to northern China and a fellow by the name of Jian Feng. Until recently, Feng was married to the love of his life, an unnamed (in the article, at least) beauty who had also recently given birth to their daug ... More >>

Football! This Weekend's Best Bets, "Satan Hates Auburn" Edition

I was saddened on Thursday to hear of the passing of legendary college football historian and journalist Beano Cook, who passed away in his sleep at the age of 81. Back in the `80's and early `90's, before the television landscape was cluttered with literally dozens of studio shows all blending toge ... More >>

Football! This Weekend's Best Bets, Charlie Weis Celebration Practice Video Edition

This week's tale of gambling riches comes from Branford, Ontario, where locally their version of the lottery is actually an NFL parlay card of sorts, where if a player picks 15 games 100 percent correctly, they will win a sizable six-figure payout. In Week 3 of the NFL season, a man named Gino DiFe ... More >>

Boom. Roasted. -- The Monday Morning College Football Roast, Drunk Betty White Edition

Saturday night, given the choice between staying at home with me to watch the annual Denard Robinson Tear-Notre-Dame's-Heart-Out-And-Show-It-To-Them-Apalooza (and experiencing the corresponding remote control throwing that goes with it) and going out to dinner with her girlfriends to a nice restaura ... More >>

6 College Football Coaching Changes: From Shadiest to Slimiest

UH's departed skipper makes the cut​From status-seeking coaches to wheeling-and-dealing athletic directors, the post-season shake-up of college football head coaches has been a bit curious. The top (lowest?) six moves are ranked here on a scale of shady to slimy ("mildly shady" being a 1 whi ... More >>

So You Want To Be The University of Texas Offensive Coordinator...APPLY HERE

What are the hours?​As a resident of the great state of Texas, it pains me to see our tax dollars being wasted. Case in point, somewhere in Austin there is a person who had to spend a couple hours of his or her day posting the offensive and defensive coordinator positions for the University ... More >>

NFL & College Football -- Weekend's Best Bets

When it comes to college football, I'm not a staunch traditionalist. I believe the season is more compelling when the longtime powers are strong (Translation: Texas, Florida, Michigan, Notre Dame, and Miami all being mediocre is, to me, a bad thing.), and yet I picked Boise State before the season ... More >>

Houston Texans -- The Green Mile, 5 Winners and 5 Losers

Texans fans: Enjoy it today, resume griping tomorrow​The Texans beat the Chiefs on Sunday afternoon 35-31 to move to 4-2 for the first time in the history of the franchise, and I for one am going to enjoy it. Seriously, try to stop me. You can try and bring me down with your texts and tweets and ... More >>

Best Sporting Event I Ever Attended -- 10/15/88

ND-Miami: No love lost​"This game was won by the Notre Dame spirit." -- Notre Dame head coach Lou Holtz after Notre Dame's 31-30 win over Miami, October 15, 1988 Fact. Those eight words uttered by Lou Holtz encapsulate so much. In specific terms, it pays homage to the tradition and magic that wa ... More >>

Why Notre Dame Will Win The BCS And UT Won't, 2010 Edition: Part 3

Montana: He's back!! Kinda​Time for another of our weekly efforts at explaining to you benighted Longhorn fans why UT won't win the BCS this year, but Notre Dame will.It's going to be difficult to limit the discussion to just the traditional five reasons, but ND fans are all about tradition. So le ... More >>

Why ND Will Win The BCS Title And UT Won't 2010 -- Part 2

Watch out, Wyoming!! UT is comin' at ya!!​Our second annual weekly explanation of why Notre Dame will win the BCS title this year and the University of Texas won't got off to a predictable start this weekend: The Irish manhandled a savage opponent while the Longhorns struggled mightily to eke out ... More >>

Joseph Wade Walker: The XXXL Bandit Has Waddled His Last

Joseph Walker, XXXL​Houston has been transfixed with the livin' large antics of the XXXL Bandit, the roly-poly bank robber who was a modern-day cross between Charlie Weis and (Not So) Pretty Boy Floyd.The run -- the waddle? -- is over. The Harris County Sheriff's Office has announced today they ca ... More >>

UT-Notre Dame Football Series: It's Coming, Longhorns

Fear the leprechaun. Fear it!!!​It's not often that the University of Texas steps up to play major college football programs -- they seem to prefer the Sam Houston States and UL-Monroes of the world for their out-of-conference schedule -- but that may be changing.Rumors are flying that the Longhor ... More >>

Game Time: Roy Oswalt and Lance Berkman -- Five Thoughts

Photo by groovehouseActually enjoying a game at Minute Maid?​I know it's only three games. I know they were playing the Brewers. I know my judgment may be clouded by the fact that they actually won all three games, getting great pitching in the process. But I actually enjoyed going to an Ast ... More >>

Game Time: An Open Letter To Texans Linebacker Brian Cushing

Three clean guys. Way to go, USC​Dear Brian,I won't even start off this letter with some colloquial phrase like "How was your weekend?" I know your weekend probably sucked, and the truth of the matter is I hate it when people ask how you're doing and don't really want to hear the answer. Along w ... More >>

Game Time: If You Like The Texans Pick Of Kareem Jackson at #20 GIMME A HELL YEAH...Hey, Who Let All These Crickets In Here?

​I would have to say the NFL's taking the first round of its draft and transforming it from hardcore niche sporting event on Saturday afternoons to Must-See TV Thursday night melodrama was a success in its first year. We got plenty of shaking and moving (seven draft night trades involving firs ... More >>

Game Time: Best-Case NFL Draft Scenario For HBO's Hard Knocks Fans

​In the end, I guess someone had to go. If you're the front office of a proud franchise like the Steelers, you can only have so many impromptu press conferences, district attorney explanations, and women screaming foul before a message needs to get sent. You're not going to move the star quarte ... More >>

Game Time: National Signing Day, The Creepiest Day In Sports...And I'm Part Of The Problem

​It's all a matter of how you look at it -- if you're a diehard college football fan, then today is December 25. You woke up this morning and ran over to your computer to pull up ESPN's Recruit Tracker the same way you ran downstairs to see what was under the Christmas tree when you were a kid. (" ... More >>

Your Last Shot At Free UH Tickets, And A Chance To Party With Sean Pendergast, Is Almost Here

Time is running out on the chance to spend some time with blogger extraordinaire and 1560 The Game host Sean Pendergast -- with the added value of free food, drink and college hoops thrown in. (Technically, you can even enjoy the free stuff and ignore Sean all night long.)Sean will be hosting a grou ... More >>

Game Time: The Decade's Five Most Lucrative Miracles

​First, I want to wish everybody out there a very happy holiday, and thank all of you who have read my stuff here on HoustonPress.com since I started up a couple months ago, especially those of you who leave comments (even if you think what you've just read is utter drivel, and you're telling me ... More >>

Game Time: Sure Thing...Betting The Opposite Of The Village Idiot

​If you're keeping track, you know that I've been sucking on my football picks since I started posting here at Hair Balls. My sincere hope is that all of you are doing the smart thing and running to the pay window with picks the exact opposite of mine, and laughing gleefully while doing so. I dese ... More >>

Why Notre Dame Will Win The BCS Title Next YearAnd UT Won't, Part 10

​It's been a fun nine weeks, watching the slow, tortuous slide into mediocrity of the Longhorn football program, even as its deluded fans continue to fantasize about a BCS title, completely unaware that Notre Dame is breathing down their back ready to take that title away.Next year.It turns out we ... More >>

Game Time: The Larry Johnson Situation

​Every spring I bring my kids to the Blue-Gold spring football game at the University of Notre Dame. Most seasons, we purchase tickets to that event that allow us (and several hundred other Notre Dame fans) to have breakfast with the team, and then meet all of the players in an exclusive autograp ... More >>

Game Time: Friday Broken Glass

​Just cleaning up some random broken glass in my "Blog" folder on a Friday ... Can You Guess This Team? Channeling my inner Cosmo Kramer... WHO WANTS TO HAVE SOME FUN?! Ok, well, I'm going to describe a fairly well known football team to many of you, and after I'm finished describing them, s ... More >>

Five Reasons Notre Dame Will Win The BCS This Year And Texas Won't: Part 2

​I admit, there will be Tuesday mornings when it will be difficult to write this item each week. Luckily, today isn't one of them.In Week Two of the college-football season, Notre Dame continued effortlessly along its well-planned path to the BCS title, while UT stumbled badly.It remains to be see ... More >>

Mack Brown vs. Iraq & John Lomax vs. a Metro bus

Highlights from the Blog at HOUSTONPRESS.COM

UT's Mack Brown Visits The Troops, And Complains Endlessly

Mack Brown, along with a handful of other NCAA coaches, is making a goodwill visit to the troops in Germany, Iraq and Kuwait. (He's following in the footsteps of a coach at an actual good football school, Notre Dame's Charlie Weis, who visited the Middle East earlier this year.)Brown's to be com ... More >>

College Bowl Preview: Picks By A Real Expert, The Finale

The college football bowl season is here, and it's become such a confusing mess of odd-sounding games played in smallish towns with mediocre teams that you need an expert to figure it out. And nothing says "expert" more than a teen-aged kid, whether the subject is football, driving, or how inutterab ... More >>

College Bowl Preview: Picks By A Real Expert, The Finale

The college football bowl season is here, and it's become such a confusing mess of odd-sounding games played in smallish towns with mediocre teams that you need an expert to figure it out. And nothing says "expert" more than a teen-aged kid, whether the subject is football, driving, or how inutterab ... More >>

College Bowl Game Preview: Picks by A Real Expert, Part Two

The college football bowl season is here, and it's become such a confusing mess of odd-sounding games played in smallish towns with mediocre teams that you need an expert to figure it out. And nothing says "expert" more than a teen-aged kid, whether the subject is football, driving, or how inutterab ... More >>

College Bowl Game Preview: Picks by A Real Expert, Part Two

The college football bowl season is here, and it's become such a confusing mess of odd-sounding games played in smallish towns with mediocre teams that you need an expert to figure it out. And nothing says "expert" more than a teen-aged kid, whether the subject is football, driving, or how inutterab ... More >>

College Bowl Season: Previews By A Real Expert

The college football bowl season is here, and it's become such a confusing mess of odd-sounding games played in smallish towns with mediocre teams that you need an expert to figure it out. And nothing says "expert" more than a teen-aged kid, whether the subject is football, driving, or how inutterab ... More >>

College Bowl Season: Previews By A Real Expert

The college football bowl season is here, and it's become such a confusing mess of odd-sounding games played in smallish towns with mediocre teams that you need an expert to figure it out. And nothing says "expert" more than a teen-aged kid, whether the subject is football, driving, or how inutterab ... More >>

John Royal's Top Twenty Sports Moments of 2007, Part Two

The College Football Preview, Week Eight: More Babes. And More Babes.

The College Football Review, Week Five: Horns, Sooners and Coogs Lose. Gig ‘Em.

The College Football Preview, Week Five: No Wins for Notre Dame, No Arrests for Texas

College Football Review: Week Three

Here Come the Irish

Football U: The Thugs Love Us!

Football U: The Thugs Love Us!

Bragging Rights

The Port praises itself, with omissions