Cheetos

Houston's 10 Sweetest 420 Shows and Festivals

I'm not going to launch into some long diatribe as an opening to this blog; there's no need. All that needs to be said can be summed up in one word -- weed. That's right. This is a blog about all the sweet 420 festivals and events around Houston to help you declare your love for the mean green hol ... More >>

Apple "Spaceship" Campus Over Budget: Here Are Five Things We'd Cut

Apple has proposed a massive doughnut-shaped campus for their new world headquarters. Nicknamed the "spaceship," this monument to computing (and crazy) was slated to cost about $3 billion initially, but apparently the budget has ballooned to $5 billion. With cost overruns over $2 billion, Apple has ... More >>

Kimchi Ramen and a Flaming Hot Cheeto Roll at Miso Yummy: Ramen Purists Beware

While half the city was gorging themselves on ramen at Goro & Gun this weekend, I lucked upon a less crowded spot to slurp noodles: the front patio of Inversion Coffee House, where brand-new food truck Miso Yummy was parked only a few feet away. (Full disclosure: I ended up eating ramen at Goro & Gu ... More >>

First Look at the Second Location of Hollister Grill, a New Direction for a Spring Branch Standard

As the club scene along Washington Avenue fades into obscurity, I've been glad to see that the restaurant scene has done the exact opposite. Stalwarts such as Laredo Taqueria and Los Dos Amigos have remained in business while pioneers like Max's Wine Dive and Molina's -- two of the first "new" rest ... More >>

Burgers Off the Beaten Path: Poppa Burger

There is a blink-and-you'll-miss-it scene in Brewster McCloud -- the movie set in Houston that wasn't Reality Bites or Terms of Endearment -- in which you can spot a multicolored billboard on the side of Main Street for Poppa Burger. The building on the other side of the street is the M&M Building, ... More >>

The Taste: Three Chefs And A Baby

Nobody ever went broke underestimating the taste of the American public. - H.L. Mencken Greetings, Eating Our Words-ians. My name's Pete and I usually skulk over on Art Attack writing about things that nobody cares about. This includes weekly recaps of random reality shows, so when I decided to wr ... More >>

5 Better Places to Hide If You're Stalking Lady Gaga

Most likely you were at home with your family on Thanksgiving, watching the game and stuffing your face. But if you were a completely psychotic "Little Monster," you might have preferred to spend that time with 35 others camped out in the garage of Lady Gaga's mansion. Yes, boys and girls, some 35 ... More >>

"Hello" Again: Coast Is Back, For Those Who Have Been Missing Him

"The same guy that left for three years and didn't say 'bye,' I think I should go on to take the time to stop and say 'hi.'" -- Coast For an all-too-short period approximately a handful of years ago, Coast, perhaps the most Google-unfriendly rapper of all, was accessible. His music, a hyper-humani ... More >>

Fuccing the Devil With Against Me!'s Andrew Seward

If there is something that is sadly lacking in the world, it's musicians directing music videos. Some do it, of course, like Blitzen Trapper's Brian Adrian Koch or Taylor Momsen who does her own storyboards. For better or for worse, though, most bands turn their product over to a professional direct ... More >>

Three Rules for the Proper Use of Truffle Oil

My esteemed colleague Jeremy Parzen recently wrote an article decrying truffle oil as "evil" and as something akin to farts. Farts? Really? If truffle oil were really all that bad, it wouldn't continue ending up on dishes in some of the best restaurants in Houston. As with any other pungent ingredi ... More >>

Go Gourmet This 420 Day: Houston's Best Stoner Snacks

Today is 420 Day, the day known fondly to stoners everywhere as a kind of unofficial National Marijuana Appreciation Day. It's a holiday that's been around for more than 40 years -- you're not as hip or cool as your parents were, kids; they started this shit in 1971 -- and the evolution of the holid ... More >>

Secret Food Confessions

No matter how well-educated one becomes about food, some cravings never go away. Some are born in childhood. My husband complained for years when Grape Tang was discontinued and gets bizarre cravings for the crime against nature called "circus peanuts." Supposedly, it's a candy; a mind-boggling, rub ... More >>

Top 5 Choice Bits

"Choice Bits" was my grandfather's term for those special pieces of dishes that are inherently more delectable than the other parts. Obviously, what constitutes "choice bits" differs from person to person: my sister, for examples, likes the "skin" of heated milk. Here are my top 5 choice bits; reade ... More >>

Five Reasons Why Perry's Attempt to Block Negative Social Media Content Is a Bad Idea

Controlling negative publicity is tough business in the modern world. Virtually everything is caught on tape -- good and bad -- and the Internet provides the ideal place for opposition. From anonymous commenters to bloggers to people on social networking sites, it is impossible to prevent negative c ... More >>

Do the Food Truck Crawl

Photo by John SuhFood Truck Friday at the Boneyard​It sounds like the name of a new dance craze. And while you can certainly show off your skills to the music spinning from the live DJ booth, the Food Truck Crawl is much more than that. Hillary Hayden founded the event after watching a show ... More >>

Doctor Challenges Mayor Parker to Become Vegan, As If She's Not Busy With Anything Else

More, Parker. More.​Hey, Mayor Parker! Drop those bacon-wrapped Cheetos. In fact, drop everything, and become a vegan. You're not doing anything else, are you? So supposes Dr. Neal Barnard, a nutritionist who's coming all the way from D.C. to fix Houston's lardy lifestyle with legumes. As p ... More >>

The Sonoma Burger and Salted Caramel Duck Fat Fries at The Burger Guys

Mai PhamThe Sonoma Burger at The Burger Guys. Applewood smoked bacon, cheddar, avocado, arugula, aoili​I am happily burger-obsessed. I crave them, I find them, I eat them, and I enjoy them. I repeat this process regularly, and last week, the process led me to what has got to be one of Houston' ... More >>

Openings & Closings

Photo courtesy of The Love ShackSeriously, this place just looks downright charming.​We broke the news earlier this week about the Anvil boys -- Bobby Heugel and Kevin Floyd -- opening a new bar, Hay Merchant (1100 Westheimer), which will focus entirely on beer. Mostly craft beer. And that sup ... More >>

All Your Protein Bars Are Belong to Us

Nothing like guarana and essential vitamins to help you kick ass at Halo.​Nerds don't tend to eat well. Whether you are watching an epic Dr. Who marathon or trying to vanquish your mortal enemy (i.e. Kenny in accounting) in World of Warcraft, it's tough to take your hand off the controls or ... More >>

Pie, Dirt and Pimento Cheese: Food Trends for 2011

Photo by Troy Fields2011 will be the year of the hot dog...among other delights.​Back in October, Nation's Restaurant News released their annual list of predicted food trends for 2011. Some items were already cresting the horizon here in Houston two months ago: high-end junk food, one-dish res ... More >>

Cheeto Sunday Funday

​A good friend of mine and I created a tradition sometime ago that we call Cheeto Sunday. It's a simple premise: You eat Cheetos on Sunday. It's a fun tradition that we have enjoyed for some time now. Lately, though, I have noticed Cheetos appearing in restaurant food items, which has kick ... More >>

Six Things To Do if the NFL and NBA Have Lockouts Next Year

Don't let a potential lockout piss you off.​There's been a lot of talk of a lockout in both the NFL and the NBA next year. There's no way to know whether stadiums and arenas will sit quiet and empty or if they'll go with replacement players and still sit quiet and empty. With all this uncerta ... More >>

Lindsay Lohan & Demi Lovato: Mamas, Don't Let Your Babies Grow Up To Be Pop Stars

You said it, Demi.​If you're a parent, one day you'll inevitably come to the sobering realization that your child's ultimate happiness is out of your hands. Naturally you're going to avoid feeding them Red Bull and Cheetos for lunch (that's a man's meal) or letting them juggle steak knives, bu ... More >>

Craving Sushi for Happy Hour

Happy Hour at Crave Sushi​ Sushi happy hours are one of the best bangs for your buck: cheap drinks, lots of specially priced appetizers and of course discounted sushi. The best part is any risk you might be taking from consuming raw seafood is minimized by the copious amount of alcohol you're ... More >>

Top 10 Old-Timey Burgers in Houston

Photo by Erika RayCheeseburger at Sparkle Burger​Sometimes, you don't want a burger covered with crushed Cheetos or peanut butter. Sometimes you don't want a burger served under flocked wallpaper that you had to wait 25 minutes to be seated for. Sometimes you don't want a burger that's served ... More >>

Odd Pair: Cheetos & Höpler Grüner Veltliner

​I'm generally a pretty healthy eater. My idea of fast food is picking up a readymade vegetable-heavy dinner from Whole Foods. Despite this, or perhaps because of it, I love Cheetos. In fact, I have dedicated an entire day of the week to it: "Cheeto Sunday." The idea is simple. On Sundays, I ... More >>

What Does Katy Perry Taste Like?

​Last week when we gave Kesha a bloggardly shellacking, we compared her and other female pop stars of her ilk to burritos. You may remember we said she was a gas-station burrito and Miley Cyrus was a Big Mac wrap. It was either a stroke of genius or the starved ramblings of a music writer subs ... More >>

What Does Katy Perry Taste Like?

​Last week when we gave Kesha a bloggardly shellacking, we compared her and other female pop stars of her ilk to burritos. You may remember we said she was a gas-station burrito and Miley Cyrus was a Big Mac wrap. It was either a stroke of genius or the starved ramblings of a music writer subs ... More >>

Capsule Art Reviews: "Daniel Heimbinder: Story," "Hand+Made: The Performative Impulse in Art and Craft," "Maurizio Cattelan," "Steve Wolfe on Paper"

Capsule Art Reviews: "Claire Ankenman: Phase," "Daniel Heimbinder: Story," "Maurizio Cattelan," "Steve Wolfe on Paper," "The White Album"

Capsule art Reviews: "Daniel Heimbinder: Story", "Hand+Made: The Performative Impulse in Art and Craft", "Maurizio Cattelan"

Capsule Art Reviews: "Daniel Heimbinder: Story", "Hand+Made: The Performative Impulse in Art and Craft", "Steve Wolfe on Paper"

Food Fight: Battle Iced Coffee

This is still my all-time favorite, when I can find it.​It's only the very beginning of May, yet it's already becoming oppressively hot by 10 a.m. each day. And although no good morning can start without a cup of coffee, the hot black stuff just doesn't appeal on days when my legs are sticking ... More >>

The 10 Most Useless Kitchen Appliances

YOU DON'T NEED THIS.​We talk a lot on this blog about eating. We talk a lot about cooking. We also talk a lot about booze, food porn and the "less polite" bodily functions (in case you're wondering, the "more polite" bodily functions include yawning and sneezing, but only if it's a cute sneeze ... More >>

Party In The US, Eh?

Photo courtesy of Geeks Who Drink Posing with the winners and their official EOW aprons. Aren't they spiffy?​ ​Last night found Eating Our Words in a bar with a pint of Fireman's #4. That part isn't unusual. What was unusual was the fact that we had a microphone in our hand, loudly askin ... More >>

Tiger Woods Incident Proves Five Truisms Are True

​Tiger Woods' little traffic accident this holiday weekend has gripped the nation like nothing since Balloon Boy. It's also about as important as Balloon Boy.(This just in for those under-a-rock dwellers: Woods crashed his SUV into a fire hydrant and tree near his driveway at about 2:30 in the mor ... More >>

The Stampede Towards Buffalo Market

Photos by Katharine Shilcutt Whimsical cakes take the stage at the Buffalo Market's bakery​H-E-B is opening yet another new concept store in Houston, after finding success here with Central Market, H-E-B Pantry, Mi Tienda and the vast new 129,000-square-foot H-E-B at Bunker Hill and I ... More >>

Texas Spider-Man Fans: You Could Be A Broadway Star! (Or, Maybe Not)

Spider-Man geeks, rejoice!! You may not only get to live out your fantasy -- being Peter Parker and his alter ego -- but you can be a Broadway star!! Or, on the other hand, you can participate in a huge publicity stunt. They're making a musical out of Spiderman, complete with a new (to us, anyw ... More >>

Better Watch What You're Putting On Your Facebook Page

Allegedly, more people use Facebook than e-mail, and during the last several months, Twitter became a verb. But for Corporate America, that could cause some problems, according to Houston attorney Chris Schaeper. "Twenty years ago, you might be having beers with an old frat buddy from college and ha ... More >>

Party Priest Andrew WK Cancels Keene Street Show

Healthy For a Day (or Two): Marathon Dining at Ziggy’s and Field of Greens

Pot Hole: Live Oaks Lofts Snubs Stoners

Mexican American Culture

Shell Game

Over the Hedge wants you to feel bad about what it's selling, which is everything

Butt In

Rugrats run amok at the H-E-B Children's Festival

I See London, I See France

A glimpse into the world of barroom lingerie-night models

She's Got Game

Video game vixen Morgan Webb stops by for a little X-Play

Pitchfork's Progress

Will a sassy, hip Web site spell doom for printed rock criticism?

Far from Happy

The year's best featured plenty of sad white guys

Hands Up

Ganja, gore and good humor the fun's back in a horror flick