Christmas

Woodlands Ice Rink

Brew Blog: Southern Star Le Mort Vivant

We have a grand Christmas tradition in my house, one that's gone on for as long as we've had kids. Every Christmas Eve, after the kids are in bed, my wife and I wrap presents. It's a tradition forged out of a combination of laziness and pragmatism. Sure, we could have wrapped a few here and there fo ... More >>

Sex and Spacemen: The Weirdest Christmas Songs We Could Find

Photo illustration by John Seaborn GrayI want to believe.​Just the other day, Rocks Off sat at the computer, blank-faced and still, the cursor blinking uninterrupted. See, normally at this time of year, we come up with a list of depressing Christmas songs. This year, though, there was a proble ... More >>

Classic Christmas: Nat King Cole's The Christmas Song

Over the holidays, we're looking back at some classic Christmas albums taking some track by track and just digging on others. ​Originally titled The Magic of Christmas, when it was released in 1963, this collection of Christmas songs was basically cobbled together in support of what many -- m ... More >>

Christmas Traditions: Mom's Best Fudge

Remember to cut a small square for yourself, for "testing" purposes.​My mother is known for many things, but chief among them are her Christmas baked goods, including this family recipe for fudge. Each year, lucky friends and family make out with a tin or two. And until my grandfather passed a ... More >>

Give It Away: Music We're Gifting to Friends for Christmas

​We're a generous bunch at Rocks Off. We just give and give and give until it hurts, and then we give some more. That's just how we roll. And when we give, well, it may seem obvious, but we tend to give the gift of music. Our friends and family are appreciative, though we do think grandma is j ... More >>

Classic Christmas: Elvis' Christmas Album

Over the holidays, we're looking back at some classic Christmas albums taking some track by track and just digging on others. ​In 1957 at the near peak of his early success, Elvis Presley did what many artists did: He made a Christmas record. The result was what would become one of the best s ... More >>

Classic Christmas: The Perry Como Christmas Album

Over the holidays, we're looking back at some classic Christmas albums taking some track by track and just digging on others. ​When we think back now about the 1950's, we tend to idealize them as the birth of rock and roll, when kids were wearing leather jackets and rebelling against their pa ... More >>

Capsule Stage Reviews: Anna Bella Eema, A Christmas Carol, Cinderella, Fruitcakes, Irving Berlin's White Christmas, The Nutcracker

Over the holidays, we're looking back at some classic Christmas albums taking some track by track and just digging on others. ​When we think back now about the 1950's, we tend to idealize them as the birth of rock and roll, when kids were wearing leather jackets and rebelling against their pa ... More >>

Classic Christmas: Charles Brown & Friends' Merry Christmas Baby

Over the holidays, we're looking back at some classic Christmas albums taking some track by track and just digging on others. ​Blues musician Charles Brown released and re-released Christmas songs numerous times throughout his career. The Texas City native got a lot of mileage out of Christma ... More >>

Christmas Crunch Time: Five (Kind Of) Shopping (And Thieving) Related Songs

​So, did you get all your Christmas shopping done? Oh, uhh...you haven't started? You're not alone. Tons of us procrastinate and leave it all until the last possible weekend (or if you're really ballsy, Christmas Eve) and then we're super screwed, forced to brave Memorial City, Katy Mills or e ... More >>

Hot, Hot Christmas: Nine Erotic Novels About The Holiday Season (Semi-NSFW)

When the yuletide whip comes down​Porn never sleeps. You'd think the holy season of baby Jesus and Santa would not be fodder for writers of erotica, both soft-core and not-so-soft-core, but you'd be wrong. Geez, there's probably a sub-genre out there of Veteran's Day "romance' novels. To be ... More >>

Gifts Galore

Wrapping up Houston's holiday shows.

Classic Christmas: The Carpenters' Christmas Portrait

Over the holidays, we're looking back at some classic Christmas albums taking some track by track and just digging on others. ​In the '70s, there was a smoothness to the music. It was cool and mellow and as sensitive as a bear skin rug and a glass of Burgundy. And nothing epitomized that time ... More >>

Saddest Christmas in Hyde Park: Neighborhood's Tree Stolen

Starring Susan Lucci....​If this was a Lifetime movie, it would all end with everyone learning the true meaning of Christmas. And maybe it still will. But as of now, there are still plenty of commercial breaks to go before the story ends. Sunday was supposed to be the day to celebrate the se ... More >>

Top 5 Reasons Cyber Monday Is Better Than Black Friday

To bastardize a line from Groundhog Day, "Well, it's Black Friday...again." It's that oh-so-magical time of year when the strong walk away from predawn shopping trips with armfuls of electronic goodies while the weak get treated by EMS for boot marks left by shoppers stampeding into Best Buy. Since ... More >>

Rainy, Cold Post-Thanksgiving Weekend...in Houston!

There's a saying that if you don't like the weather in Texas, just wait. Well, this weekend qualifies, particularly for those of you all hopped up on turkey, Christmas songs and holiday joy as you flit about the area malls and Best Buys scraping and clawing your way to gift-buying bliss. Most peopl ... More >>

5 Reasons You Should Skip Black Friday for Cyber Monday

Well, it's Black Friday again. I sincerely hope you and your loved ones remain un-trampled and filled with holiday spirit or, if retailers got their wish, with carloads of merchandise. Since 2005, the nerdy cousin to Black Friday has been Cyber Monday. Traditionally, and I hesitate to even use that ... More >>

The 5 Best Local Beers to Bring to Thanksgiving Dinner

A bite of banana in every beer.​Just in time for Christmas, Buffalo Bayou Brewing hopes to release its first beer to the public: an 11 percent gingerbread Imperial stout that would be the toast of any Christmas dinner. For Thanksgiving, however, there are plenty of locally brewed beers that w ... More >>

Winter Wonderettes

A bite of banana in every beer.​Just in time for Christmas, Buffalo Bayou Brewing hopes to release its first beer to the public: an 11 percent gingerbread Imperial stout that would be the toast of any Christmas dinner. For Thanksgiving, however, there are plenty of locally brewed beers that w ... More >>

10 Christmas Songs That Are Really About Drugs

memecenter.comMerry fuckin' Christmas, mang.​Halloween is right around the corner, so you know what that means: Time to start making a list and checking it twice. Bourbon, gin, scotch, vodka, Xanax, painkillers... Walgreen's and CVS have already stocked their shelves with wrapping paper, plas ... More >>

Merry Christmas Ukraine!

Muffet​You may be appalled that I am still talking about Christmas. Well, Ukrainian Christmas begins January 6, which is considered Christmas Eve, while Christmas day is then on the 7th, and the whole shebang culminates on January 19th with Epiphany. I was happily curious after being invited ... More >>

Need Beer On Christmas Day? What's Open

And to all a good night​Our sister blog Eating...Our Words is full of service-y goodness, listing all the places you can go to eat in Houston this Christmas Day. But by this point in the day, you may be realizing a more pressing need: Beer. Yeah, relatives are great and all, but not when yo ... More >>

Christmas Puppies: Five Great Surprise Videos

Every kid wants a puppy, right? And Santa knows this, correct? So puppies make perfect Christmas gifts. You have to know how to do the presentation, of course. And film it. Here are five great videos of kids' puppy-Christmas wishes coming true: 5. Let's Torture The Kids First Like every parent wh ... More >>

It’s a Wonderful Life

Every kid wants a puppy, right? And Santa knows this, correct? So puppies make perfect Christmas gifts. You have to know how to do the presentation, of course. And film it. Here are five great videos of kids' puppy-Christmas wishes coming true: 5. Let's Torture The Kids First Like every parent wh ... More >>

Sampler Plate: This Week in Food Blogs

Each week, we put together a sampler plate of the most interesting links from both local and national food blogs. Know a blog we should be paying particular attention to? Leave the address in the comments section below. Robb Walsh: If you're still stumped for a Christmas gift, Robb Walsh would like ... More >>

The Lost Sinatra Group Christmas Episode

​Through the magic of Christmas, Rocks Off has received a copy of the transcript of the "Sinatra Group" sketch that was filmed in an alternate reality last weekend, one in which Phil Hartman never died, and Saturday Night Live is currently in one of its funniest seasons to date. What else cou ... More >>

Skeleton Dick: 3-D And Dinosaurs For Christmas

​Rocks Off is convinced we're going out on Christmas Day to do some of that rock and rolling thing that seems to be so popular with the kids. But where shall we go? The goth in us is leaning towards dropping by Numbers for Underworld's Christmas Party. Then again, there's always the ERASEtheVI ... More >>

City Hall Farmers Market: Get Your Last-Minute Food Gifts

Get your loved ones some cheese for Christmas!​The very last City Hall Farmers Market of the year is taking place tomorrow from 10 a.m. to 2 p.m. in its usual location, surrounding the pool directly in front of City Hall. The market will be taking a brief holiday break for Christmas and will b ... More >>

Brew Blog: Great Divide Brewing Co., the Christmas Ale from Anchor Brewing Co., and Avery Brewing Co.'s Old Jubilation Ale

​Putting up a post this week on Christmas beers surely strikes several of you as last-minute, but are you really done with your shopping? Yeah, we didn't think so. We recently loaded up for the season with several six-packs that caught our eye at Central Market, including Hibernation Ale fro ... More >>

Blues Christmas

​Putting up a post this week on Christmas beers surely strikes several of you as last-minute, but are you really done with your shopping? Yeah, we didn't think so. We recently loaded up for the season with several six-packs that caught our eye at Central Market, including Hibernation Ale fro ... More >>

Top 10 Non-Traditional Christmas Songs

"Baby Jesus, born to rock..." ​Amidst the time of year when we're bombarded with cliché holiday tunes and trite Christmas-carol covers, Rocks Off will now take time to appreciate a few original nontraditional takes on festive songs. Whether they're dismal adaptations of holiday malaise, tale ... More >>

Five More Severely Depressing Christmas Songs

​Last year, we rounded up quite a collection of depressing Christmas songs to darken your mood just in time for the holidays, but - as many people were quick to point out - we left a few off the list. Well, we're nothing if not thorough, and this year we've found five more monsters of morosen ... More >>

Island Of Misfit Christmas Albums: Teen Pop Meltdown

​It happens like this: You are in charge of a major teen-pop act who can sell anything with their face or voice on it, be it training bras, shaving cream, or caskets. You have a week off in the summer from touring. Do you let the talent go home and sleep in their own beds or do you shove the ... More >>

Recipe: Mom's Christmas Fudge

Remember to cut a small square for yourself, for "testing" purposes.​My mother is known for many things, but chief among them are her Christmas baked goods, including this family recipe for fudge. Each year, lucky friends and family make out with a tin or two. And until my grandfather passed a ... More >>

All I Want for Christmas Is...Ah, Hell, I Know Nobody's Spending: Top 5 Cheap Kitchen Gadgets

Last week, Lauren Marmaduke threw out a few not so subtle hints for her friends and family, regarding what she'd like to find under her Christmas tree this year. I took one look at her excellent list, and decided right away that nobody in my family likes me enough to lay out that kind of cash. For t ... More >>

The 12 Really Most Annoying Things About Christmas Shopping

And we didn't even mention THIS​It's getting to crunch time. You gotta buy gifts. You could do it online, but no, you want to get into the spirit of things and mingle with your fellow revelers. You will regret this decision. We asked you to give us examples of what you find most annoying ab ... More >>

Comment Of The Day: War On Christmas Edition

​We have some great commenters here on Hair Balls, and it's time we paid some damn attention to them. So we'll be highlighting a Comment of the Day each morning, from the previous day's work. Maybe two comments, even. This will all be determined by a highly rigorous scientific formula involv ... More >>

Island Of Misfit Albums: A .38 Special Christmas

​For the whole month of December, Rocks Off will be scouring for the weirdest and worst Christmas albums that the Internet can offer. These will either be odd, seasonal detours from your favorite artists, or confounding monstrosities from classic-rock also-rans. .38 Special, "It's Christmas ... More >>

Top 12 Sexiest Christmas Album Covers

​Above is the cover of the new Christmas single by once-popular barroom grunge act Buckcherry. We have to say, we like it a lot better than we like their music. It continues a tradition of sexy yuletide album covers, which Rocks Off is proud to document for your ogling pleasure. We'll try to ... More >>

The Five Most Annoying Christmas Ads

Anyone who's watched football (or What Not to Wear, we guess) recently knows that the onslaught has begun: The horror of Christmas commercials. These heinous 30-second bits of torture can abuse viewers in several ways. Here are five of the worst. 5. Jewelry for the Meek, Submissive Weaker Sex Whet ... More >>

$5 Awesome: The Toys Soundtrack

Rocks Off has picked up some CDs over the years at prices so low we think that it would've been less insulting to the artists if we had stolen them. Some of these have become our favorite albums, and in this column we'll tell you what they are and why! ​For Rocks Off's money, there is no more ... More >>

The Ice Rink at Woodlands Town Center

Have yourself a merry little navidad

The Best and Worst Christmas Specials of All Time

Every winter brings the onslaught of family tension, shopping, and that most American of pastimes, the Christmas special. They're typically half an hour, though they can be longer, and they often take characters from an already-established world and run them through the gauntlet of festivities surro ... More >>

Capsule Stage Reviews: A Christmas Carol, Miracle on 34th Street, The Nerd, The Nutcracker, O Little Town of Bagels, Teacakes, and Hamburger Bun, Panto Sleeping Beauty

Every winter brings the onslaught of family tension, shopping, and that most American of pastimes, the Christmas special. They're typically half an hour, though they can be longer, and they often take characters from an already-established world and run them through the gauntlet of festivities surro ... More >>

Miracle on 34th Street

Yes, Susan, there is a Santa Claus

The Closet

The French add a little satire to our holiday

How the Grinch Stole Christmas

Web exclusive!

Very Merry Pops

The Houston Symphony take Christmas tunes from Muzak to merry

Making Scents of the Stars

A buyer's guide to celebrity fragrances