Church of Scientology

After Earth: Smith Family Robinson

The adventure flick pretends it’s not an M. Night Shyamalan film

What's Behind Gary Douglas's Scientology Knockoff?

Access Consciousness promises to help you reach a higher plane. For a price.

Cover Story: Are You Human or Humanoid?

You may not know this, but nearly half the world's population isn't human: they may look human, but they're another species called "humanoid." Humanoids don't have DNA like the rest of us; they have a Mobius strip that can create DNA. At least that's what a self-help organization called Access Consc ... More >>

Meet The Monsters of TIFF

A glimpse of this year's most bracing films.

The Master: From the Window to the Wall

You aren't expecting what Paul Thomas Anderson is giving.

Paul Thomas Anderson, The Master's Master

Talking 70mm, Joaquin Phoenix, and researching Scientology for his sixth and most anticipated film

From the Window to the Wall

Summer Fest Round Table: What About Next Year?

Assuming we all survive this weekend, and then the supposed Mayan apocalypse, Free Press Summer Fest will return to Eleanor Tinsley Park in June 2013. Pegstar's Jagi Katial and Jason Petzold told the Houston Press this week that they'll start booking next year's acts in about a month, so Rocks Off p ... More >>

Texas Sons The Mars Volta Strip Down To Progress With New Album, Movie

El Paso natives Omar Rodriguez-Lopez and Cedric Bixler-Zavala of The Mars Volta have long been known for their bombast and progressive-rock self-indulgence. Ever since they departed the seminal post-hardcore band At the Drive-In, they've spent their time making what can only be described as "epics." ... More >>

Ten Musicians Who Played Other People on TV

Sebastian Bach on Gilmore Girls​Fictional television shows are full of gimmickry. Some of it is good and some of falls flat. Others are subtle in-jokes. However, it can be interesting when a popular artist appears on a television show because it gives the audience a glimpse into another side o ... More >>

Down the Hatch

The Texas Attorney General's Office says a drugmaker lied in order to push an antipsychotic on foster children. So why are kids as young as three still taking the drug?

Oh Jesus! Rock's Top 5 Religious Conversions

Rocks Off understands the need for a good detox now and then, as most of our evening antics often leave us feeling less than bright-eyed and bushy-tailed come morning. We also imagine the damage inflicted by lifetime of hard partying and endless touring in the company of morally compromised music-in ... More >>

Five People You Should Never Invite To A Concert

wallpaperbase.com"The Tinderbox"​For music lovers, few experiences outrank the transcendent nature of witnessing a great live music performance. And most avid fans have a tried and trusted circle of friends they take along for the ride, knowing that even the most righteous rock show can be can ... More >>

Food Fight: Vanilla Malt

The Burger Guys.​Way back in 2009, Katharine Shilcutt wrote in considerable detail about exactly what sort of drink could properly be called a milkshake. I have no intention of fighting that battle again, primarily because there's nothing to debate. A milkshake means milk and ice cream, and it sho ... More >>

Advertisements for Herself

Jolanda Jones says never talk to HPD

Tubby Chubcakes' Lyrics Will Melt Your Brain

Tubby Chubcakes: The great beef hunter strikes again.​Rocks Off was going to write a review of the new Tubby Chubcakes album, Tubby vs. The Musical Brain-Eating Disease, but honestly it's kind of like trying to explain Scientology to a blind water snake. Remember Tubby's video "Destroy Nickel ... More >>

Five Oprah Secrets That Would Have Been More Interesting

​Last week we started hearing rumors of a bombshell revelation coming on Monday's episode of The Oprah Winfrey Show, a discovery Winfrey made late last year which she described as a "miracle" that she said "shook me to my core." Speculation ran rampant, from the predictable "lesbian relationsh ... More >>

Island Of Misfit Albums: A Star Wars Christmas

​One thing that always bothered Rocks Off growing up as a born-again Christian child who was into the apparently godless world of Star Wars was whether or not they celebrated Christmas. The birth of Jesus Christ and stuff. Santa Claus, crap that matters. We can only assume under Empire rule th ... More >>

Top 10 Hottest Jewish Musicians

​The Festival of Lights is upon us, as the eight-day Jewish holiday of Hanukkah officially kicks off at sundown tonight. Some of music's leading bigwigs will likely be sparking up the menorah, among them Lou Reed, Paul Simon, Billy Joel, Leonard Cohen, Diamond David Lee Roth, Perry Farrell an ... More >>

Backmasking Bieber, Black Keys, Kanye, Etc.: What Do You Hear?

​"It's my sweet Satan ... Oh I will sing because I live with Satan." "Turn me on, dead man." "Turned out nice again." "Eat donkey crap." Every since the beginning of rock and roll, listeners and disgruntled parents alike have been searching for hidden meanings in music. Was Paul dead, w ... More >>

Post KTRU/KUHF, Possible Houston Mergers & Acquisitions To Come

Photo illustrations by John Seaborn GrayGozer has designs on the Galleria.​Rice University and the University of Houston have reached a deal to convert KTRU into a 24-hour white-noise station to help our city's insomniacs. Fitzgerald's was just bought out by the guys who made Mango's a viable ... More >>

The Shameless Chef: Frequently Asked Questions

When you see things like this every week, how can you not have questions?​ You wouldn't think a column as simple, straightforward and, let's be honest, stupid as mine would get a whole lot of questions, but you'd be wrong. In the - holy hell - almost a year I've been doing this, I've been aske ... More >>

Pop Rocks: John Travolta, Humanitarian

​The tragedy of the earthquake in Haiti has, as expected, brought out both the best and worst of humanity. As an example of the former, we've seen the nations of the world send supplies and relief workers to help the stricken Caribbean nation. As for the latter, well, the comments of extraordinar ... More >>

Win Passes To 2012, And See What Other Religious Buildings They Wimped Out On Destroying

Roland Emmerich, who never met a plot hole he couldn't fill with explosions and shitty dialogue, tells us there's one place we won't see bite the big one in his upcoming movie 2012:  [T]he 53-year-old director had wanted to demolish the Kaaba, the iconic cube-shaped structure in the Grand Mos ... More >>

In Honor Of Will Ferrell: The Five Biggest "Summer Blockbuster" Duds

That thud you heard last weekend was Will Ferrell's career settling noisily back to earth. With a budget estimated at over $100 million, Land of the Lost was supposed to propagate the 2009 summer blockbuster season (handily inaugurated by the new Star Trek) and continue Ferrell's successful box-offi ... More >>

For St. Patrick's Day: The Five Least Convincing Irishmen In Movies

St. Patrick's Day is more than just an opportunity for amateur drunks to get in fights after drinking since noon, it's also when all of us claim (usually bogus) Irish heritage. I can personally trace my Irish ancestry back to the 17th century. Of course, they were Ulster Huguenots and probably not v ... More >>

As You Get Ready For South Padre: The Five Best Spring Break Movies

Spring Break! Since time immemorial (or the mid-20th century, anyway) it's been a rite of passage for college students to spend their days on the beach, presenting their hindquarters to potential suitors, and their nights crammed into structurally unsound firetraps alongside hundreds of potential da ... More >>

Last Night: Negativland at Rice University

Seven Deadly Sins: Celebrity Edition

Miss Pop Rocks Loves (the First Half of) the Oscars

Mad Vegans and Pedantic Scientologists

Rod Paige and Scientology, Margaret Thatcher at the Warwick, Pool Owners and Public Works

Scientology rumors swirl

Resolutions of the Rich and Famous

Over the Weekend: Texas Hip-Hop, Drinking, Billy Joel and Sage Rosenfels

Tuesday-Night Fever

Maybe This Time

These famous (and not so famous) musicians share their hopes for 2006

Stay Young and Stupid

Dear Lord, please stop the Stingification of Beck

Capsule Reviews

Our critics weigh in on local theater

Dressing the Part

Michelle Ellsworth's ED will save your id

Letters

Between the Lines

A Scientology-backed tutoring program looks to expand in the Houston area

Tree's Company

The tannenbaum gets a makeover at Buffalo Bayou ArtPark

Capsule Reviews

Our critics weigh in on local theater

Gender Splendor

Old-fashioned Leading Ladies -- a surprise hit

The Passion of the Cruise

Me-sci-ah offers truth, celebrity and the Scientology way

Dead Again

There's fresh meat for the reaper in Final Destination 2

Funeral Rights

A Texas family confronts death, homosexuality and repression

Fully Realized Fantasy

At last, a summer movie with brains, aliens, action and...spirituality?

Archer's Way

Don't like the IRS? Neither does Bill Archer. And now the mild-mannered Houston congressman is pushing a radical plan to shut it down.

Ritalin on Trial

While some Houston parents fight what they charge is "a river of Ritalin" running through the schools, one father has gone to court to try to prove that, for his son, Ritalin use is Ritalin abuse.