Dancing with the Stars

  • Blogs

    May 5, 2014

    Johnny Manziel's Odyssey Immortalized By DJ Steve Porter

    In 2014, there are certain benchmarks or tributes that provide indicators that one has "arrived" as a star, or at least as somebody relevant with "star upside potential." They are as follows: 1. Your team has a bobble head day devoted to you. (If it's followed a couple months later with a second " ... More >>

  • Blogs

    July 17, 2013

    Stones Guitarist's Ex-Spouse Was the Wife of the Party

    It's Only Rock 'n' Roll: 30 Years Married to a Rolling Stone By Jo Wood It Books, 333 pp., $26. There are enough tomes by the ex-wives, ex-girlfriends, and ex-lovers of rock stars form their own subgenre of music books. And it's with good reason you rarely ever see one by a current squeeze -- as th ... More >>

  • Blogs

    November 2, 2012

    The Rest of the Best: Houston's Top 5 Blues Clubs

    5. THE SHAKESPEARE PUB Congratulations to the owner of Shakespeare Pub for the place's spruced-up digs. Now patrons can enjoy acts like the James Reese Band and Little Terry Rogers in plusher surroundings, not to mention sliding all night to zydeco. Of the nervous sort when it comes to public danci ... More >>

  • Blogs

    August 6, 2012

    Score One For Tom DeLay: His Democratic Judge Gets Tossed From Case

    Former U.S. House Republican leader/Dancing With the Stars contestant Tom DeLay scored big Friday with the recusal of a Democratic judge from his appellate case for money-laundering. Houston attorney Brian "Money-Quote" Wice told Hair Balls he had originally asked Justice Diane Henson to voluntari ... More >>

  • Film

    June 14, 2012

    Corporate Rock Still Sucks

    Rock of Ages posits Tom Cruise as a hair-metal god and hair metal as something un-awful.

  • Blogs

    May 23, 2012

    Is Tom DeLay Actually (Gasp) Correct That A Democratic Justice Can't Judge His Case Fairly?

    Long before his tragically brief heyday on Dancing With The Stars, Sugar Land's Tom DeLay was convicted of campaign-finance violations. He's appealing that conviction to the state's 3rd Court of Criminal Appeals in Austin, but many of the judges have taken themselves off the case. One justice who ... More >>

  • Blogs

    November 22, 2011

    Six Dancing and Singing Toys for the Holidays with Video

    The holiday season has crept upon us once again. There is nothing kids love more than toys that can bust a move. Dancing toys have always made the list of hot commodities during the Christmas season. Even some adults are amused and intrigued by their favorite characters moving to the beat. Here's a ... More >>

  • Blogs

    September 28, 2011

    Video: Hanukkah-Loving Rick Perry Dances Around the Menorah

    It's not nearly as bizarre as Tom Delay's appearance on Dancing With the Stars, but this video of Governor Rick Perry celebrating Hanukkah with a group of orthodox Jewish rabbis, intentionally or otherwise, is damn funny if for no other reason than Perry is trying his best not to look really, really ... More >>

  • Blogs

    September 27, 2011

    Last Night: Joe Jonas At House Of Blues

    Photos by Groovehouse​Joe Jonas, Jay Sean House of Blues September 26, 2011 The best part of Monday night's Joe Jonas show at House of Blues was looking down at our phone and seeing one of Nancy Grace's nipples. Nah, homegirl wasn't sexting Aftermath, she had a wardrobe malfunction/ratings bo ... More >>

  • Blogs

    September 20, 2011

    Top 5 Musical Ed Sullivan Show Controversies"You want me to sing WHAT now?"​To the right-wing conservatives, religious groups, and self-proclaimed family organizations raising hell over Chaz Bono's "assault on family values" as the first transgender contestant on Dancing With the Stars, Rocks Off asks the q ... More >>

  • News

    August 25, 2011

    Sex Cures Teen Crime

    UT study touts teen relationships

  • Blogs

    August 16, 2011

    Tom DeLay's Appeal Brief Is As Hilariously Over the Top As He Is

    Tom DeLay knows about razzle-dazzle.​Tom DeLay's embarrassing stint on Dancing with the Stars apparently taught him one thng: Go Hollywood and go brash. The appellate brief filed seeking to overturn his money-laundering conviction is, courtesy of Houston lawyer Brian Wice, as over the top as ... More >>

  • Calendar

    June 16, 2011
  • Calendar

    June 16, 2011
  • Blogs

    April 7, 2011

    Pop Rocks: The Black Hole of Infotainment

    Jesus christ...​I wonder sometimes if we're approaching the singularity in entertainment reporting. A "singularity," as we all know, is the point in which gravitational forces cause matter to have an infinite density and zero volume. If we define "density" as "number of stories and/or article ... More >>

  • Blogs

    March 22, 2011

    Pop Rocks: By the Dumb's Early Light

    Apu chose an alternate path to citizenship​There's a scene in The American President -- Aaron Sorkin's pre-West Wing exercise in wishful liberalism -- when President Shepherd (Michael Douglas) describes America as "advanced citizenship." It's a nice thought, especially in the fantastical conte ... More >>

  • News

    January 20, 2011

    Playing Favorites

    HISD partners with the Chronicle on magnet report

  • Blogs

    December 30, 2010

    Dogging Michael Vick

    Ladies and gentlemen, your Dancing With the Stars 11th runner-up.​I guess someone got tired of playing third fiddle to Sean Hannity and Bill O'Reilly: While setting up a segment on President Obama's recent telephone call to Jeffrey Lurie, the owner of the Philadelphia Eagles (wherein the pres ... More >>

  • Blogs

    December 27, 2010

    The 10 Biggest Houston Stories Of The Year

    Tom DeLay: A conviction to go with the mugshot​There are still a couple days left for earthshaking stories to take place in 2010. But since most news is bad news, let's hope the worst is over. What were the top 10 news stories in Houston in 2010? We're so glad you asked, since we've worked up ... More >>

  • Blogs

    December 3, 2010

    Margaret Cho's New "Intervention" Video, Shot In The Suburban Wilds Of Houston

    Photo by Lindsey ByrnesMargaret Cho, somewhere in Houston​The new video for Margaret Cho's "Intervention" is out, and it's all about Houston. If, that is, you define "all about" as "generically standing in for any suburb anywhere." "We shot it in Houston on a brief moment where all of us wer ... More >>

  • Blogs

    November 26, 2010

    In Case You Missed It...

    Marco TorresIt's a bird... it's a plane... it's... Usher!​Rocks Off knows you have had a busy week. So have we. But, we figured, what with Thanksgiving and Black Friday and traveling to and from your various other holiday ports of call, you may not have had as much time in front a computer as ... More >>

  • Blogs

    November 16, 2010

    Lindsay Lohan & Demi Lovato: Mamas, Don't Let Your Babies Grow Up To Be Pop Stars

    You said it, Demi.​If you're a parent, one day you'll inevitably come to the sobering realization that your child's ultimate happiness is out of your hands. Naturally you're going to avoid feeding them Red Bull and Cheetos for lunch (that's a man's meal) or letting them juggle steak knives, bu ... More >>

  • Blogs

    August 3, 2010

    Confessions Of A Sheet Music Salesman​Readers may be surprised to learn this, but searching for YouTube videos to mock and talking about Goth bands does not exactly pay for the finer things in life. So six days a week, Rocks Off - or at least the Rocks Off writer with only one "f" in his name - sells sheet music to th ... More >>

  • Blogs

    June 15, 2010

    Happy Father's Day! Loser Kids of Rock Star Dads

    We all aspire to honor our dads and hope that we've done right by them on Father's Day. Here's a list of offspring whose lives have served no useful purpose on earth other than churning out a never-ending source of disappointment for their rock star dads. ​Sean Lennon Yoko Ono is often credi ... More >>

  • Blogs

    April 9, 2010

    Fails Of The Week: Insane Clown Posse Hates Science, No Dylan In China, Rihanna & Ke$ha's Auto-Tour

    If you're reading this, you're either on the Internet, or else you've mastered multi-dimensional thought-projection processes that would make Michio Kaku cry like a little girl. We'll assume the former, and just in case you don't already know, the Internet has decided that the word "failure" is too ... More >>

  • News

    April 1, 2010

    Dogging the Dome

    An extensive investigation has uncovered secret plans for the Astrodome's future.

  • Music

    March 4, 2010

    Nightfly: Hip Movement

    Dance reigns supreme at salsa institution Club Tropicana.

  • Blogs

    February 11, 2010

    Pop Rocks: More Like Hannah "Tetons," Am I Right?

    ​Sports Illustrated's annual Swimsuit Issue hit newsstands this week. The cover features model Brooklyn Decker, also known as "Mrs. Andy Roddick." That's far from the only athlete connection in this year's issue, however, as several U.S. Olympians (skiers Lindsey Vonn and Lacy Schnoor and snowboa ... More >>

  • News

    November 26, 2009

    Turkeys of the Year

    In a highly competitive 2009 field, Governor Rick Perry is the biggest gobbler of them all.

  • Blogs

    November 17, 2009

    Dancing With the Stars: The Light at the End of the Tunnel

    ​You guys! YOU GUYS! We're closer to the end of Dancing With the Stars than I'd thought! The grid at Futon Critic only had the show running through next week, the 24th. And then, like manna from sequined heaven, Tom Bergeron confirmed at the top of last night's competition ep that next week wi ... More >>

  • Blogs

    November 10, 2009

    Dancing With the Stars: A Grotesque Carnival of Human Misery?

    It's NOT Donny Osmond!​Holy flurking schnit! It's week eight of Dancing With the Stars, which for those who don't know is when the rubber made of stardust meets the road made of awesome and the car of dreams speeds off into, um, Kickassville. I'm just kidding; the show's still incredibly borin ... More >>

  • Blogs

    November 4, 2009

    Dancing With the Stars: Gridiron or Iron Chef, Your Times Have Come

    Last night was the seventh elimination round of this season's Dancing With the Stars, and the second one to see two people go home. I guess at this point in the season the gimmick is starting to wear off? In which case, why not just have fewer contestants to start? Then again, when 16.4 million pe ... More >>

  • Blogs

    October 28, 2009

    Dancing With the Stars: The Michael Irvin Conspiracy

    His partner may or may not be the devil. Just look at those eyes!​Last night's Dancing With the Stars results show kicked off in an even more insanely dramatic fashion than normal. The montage of clips from the competition ep featured fireball cuts and blood and heavy metal! It's like Stephen ... More >>

  • Blogs

    October 27, 2009

    Dancing With the Stars: Hey, Mambo!

    ​Holy crap, you guys! It's week six of Dancing With the Stars! I thought I'd be dead by now. Tom Bergeron's trademark breathless intro made it sound like the celebrities on this show have been at war or something instead of just wearing sequined shirts and soaking up some free press, but he di ... More >>

  • Blogs

    October 16, 2009

    Crypticon Countdown: Troma's Lloyd Kaufman On The Toxic Avenger And His Yale Classmate George W. Bush

    ​The legendary Lloyd Kaufman is the co-founder of Troma Studios, and directed classics such as The Toxic Avenger, Class of Nuke 'Em High, and Poultrygeist: Night of the Chicken Dead, which will be screening this weekend at Crypticon Houston. Hair Balls asked the legendary actor, author and Yale g ... More >>

  • Blogs

    October 6, 2009

    Dancing With the Stars: Dazzle Me Steamy

    ​"Tonight is Latin night, and things are about to get steamy," Tom Bergeron intoned over the opening montage of last night's Dancing With the Stars. Half of that statement is true. This is week three, when the contestants sack up and start showing some real fire, or in the case of Tom "Dazzle ... More >>

  • Blogs

    October 6, 2009

    BREAKING OMG Important!! Tom DeLay Out Of Dancing With The Stars

    ​People magazine, which has become the place to go to find news about Tom DeLay (and that says a lot more about Tom DeLay than People) is reporting that The Hammer is out of Dancing With The Stars.Stress fractures have become too painful for the wussy Republican, who cried sissy tears at no longer ... More >>

  • Blogs

    August 19, 2009

    Rocks Off Exclusive: A Sneak Peek at Tom DeLay's Dancing With the Stars Dance Card

    By now, the news about former Sugar Land Congressman Tom DeLay's impending appearance on ABC's Dancing with the Stars has had time to sink in, and the long-term ramifications of this colossal melding of two of our greatest loves (reality television and the suffering of others) are starting to becom ... More >>

  • Blogs

    August 17, 2009

    Tom DeLay Goes Dancing With The Stars

    ​It's nice to know that the dignified, studious, classy Tom DeLay we all knew and loved in the Congress is alive and well...and appearing on Dancing with the Stars.Because that's what serious people do.ABC announced today that the former King of Sugar Land will be a contestant along with such nota ... More >>

  • Blogs

    August 17, 2009

    Tom DeLay to Debut the "Bitch Slap" on Dancing With the Stars Next Month

    News is leaking out of Hollywood that former U.S. House Majority Leader and mugshot model Tom DeLay will be part of the cast of next season's ABC hoofer ratings smash Dancing With the Stars. What hasn't come out yet is DeLay's plans to debut a new dance called the "Bitch Slap," an arm-movement-heav ... More >>

  • Blogs

    June 23, 2009

    Kendra Wilkinson Is Spawning!

    Of all the girls from The Girls Next Door, I'm really most pleased that it's Kendra who's having a baby with her fiancé, professional football player Hank Baskett. (Apparently, Hugh Hefner teared up when he heard the news that his little girl was all growed up.)Anyway, back to what I was saying ... More >>

  • Blogs

    April 21, 2009

    I Can't Get Enough of That Susan Boyle Woman

    Many moons ago, I blogged about not being able to stop watching that clip on Dancing with the Stars where Marie Osmond fainted (the post was titled "I Can't Get Enough of Marie Osmond Fainting.") People called me out, saying I was a "sick pervert" and that I represented everything that was wrong wit ... More >>

  • Blogs

    April 9, 2009

    Can't Get It Out of My Head: Anya Marina's "Whatever You Like"

    So in addition to not being able to get T.I's "Whatever You Like" outta our skulls since last fall, here comes blonde pixie Anya Marina's sultry acoustic version of the hip-hop hit. Marina is based out of San Diego, Calif., and when she's not writing sweet lil' acoustipop with her backing band, sh ... More >>

  • Blogs

    February 16, 2009

    Turning the Screw: Dustin Prestige, Kid Cudi, King Tut, Rick Ross/50 Cent, Ludacris, Lil' Kim, T.I./Chris Brown, Fat Pat and More

    Welcome back to Turning the Screw, Rocks Off's weekly rap post. It probably won't rhyme, at least most of the time. E-mail tips to Thanks, homies. Single of the Week: "Dope," Dustin Prestige Wire To Wire Kid Cudi was tasered at an NBA All-Star Game party in ... More >>

  • Blogs

    January 23, 2009

    Michael Irvin Brings Dallas Cowboys Reality Show to Spike TV

    Are you a Dallas Cowboys fan? Are you disappointed with the way the season ended? Do you think that the problem might have a little something to do with head coach Wade Phillips? Or offensive coordinator Jason Garrett? Perhaps you're like Troy Aikman who thinks the problem is that Tony Romo spe ... More >>

  • Blogs

    January 23, 2009

    Michael Irvin Brings Dallas Cowboys Reality Show to Spike TV

    Are you a Dallas Cowboys fan? Are you disappointed with the way the season ended? Do you think that the problem might have a little something to do with head coach Wade Phillips? Or offensive coordinator Jason Garrett? Perhaps you're like Troy Aikman who thinks the problem is that Tony Romo spen ... More >>

  • Blogs

    October 9, 2008
  • Blogs

    December 11, 2007

    Master P Makes the KKK Say “Ugh!”

    The opposing team stretches before the big game Master P, the former Phi Slama Jama benchwarmer recently in the news when his son Lil Romeo was offered a full basketball scholarship to USC, hit the blogosphere like the proverbial freight train this morning with his new video, “Gutta Time,” whic ... More >>

  • Blogs

    November 30, 2007

    TV Ratings, Courtesy of Houstoned Guest Commentator Conchita Maria Guadalupe Maria Hortencia Juanita Maria Garcia Gomez Gonzalez de Smith

    Just in case you had any doubt that Houston is quickly becoming a brown city, check out the latest Nielson ratings. The release from Telefutura – you didn’t even know we had a Telefutura channel, did you? – anyway, the latest release says that according to Nielsen Media Research, the Spanish ... More >>

  • News

    June 1, 2006

    Thanks, Nick!

    Nick Lachey

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