Domino's Pizza Inc.

And We Still Got the Shaft: Self-Righteous Tipper Gets Waitress Fired After Being Outed on the Internet

Any healthy adult will tell you that the proper response to being called out on a self-admitted mistake is to have the dignity and wherewithal to own the mistake and work toward improvement in the future. That sounds like a lot of work, though, and apparently Pastor Alois Bell thought so too. Pasto ... More >>

Schadenfreude Alert! 5 Thoughts On JaMarcus Russell's Attempted Comeback

For most football players, when their careers finally end, rarely does it happen on their terms. More often than not (WAY more often, actually), players are either asked to leave, never asked back, or beat up physically to the point of no return. The bravest of football warriors continue to try over ... More >>

10 Doug Sahm/Sir Douglas Quintet Albums You Need to Own

Tonight at the Continental Club, Austin's Freddie Steady 5 will head up a tribute to the late Doug Sahm focusing on Sahm's 2000 album The Return of Wayne Douglas, which he recorded only a few months before dying of a heart attack in November 1999. La Porte native Freddie Krc, leader of the 5, has ju ... More >>

A Ransom Note To All Major Fast Food Chains

Scene: KFC International Food Testing HQ "So what you're telling me, Colonel, is that I can only get these creamy, delicious, bacon and herb stuffed taters...when I go to Japan? Japan!! Is that what you're telling me!??! Cue sound effects: multiple explosions followed by a quick sword fight and t ... More >>

The Six Worst One-Game Uniforms You'll See In The 2012 College Football Season

Look good, feel good, play good? Not in these cases. This list doesn't include full-time offenders like Houston, who substituted a perfectly slick design for a blob. Instead, these universities -- some with long traditions -- will subject us to a fashion upchuck on select game days.

The 5 Fast Food Sides We Miss Most

It's once again time to look back on some of the discontinued food items that were sadistically ripped from our lives and our stomachs by the soulless monster that is corporate America. It's a cruel, cruel world out there... In case you missed our rants, we think a life without the freedom to purc ... More >>

Five Dumbest Reasons Someone Got Killed in East Texas

We understand some of you will read this and likely think: Every reason to kill someone is wrong. This rationale holds ostensible merit, you, reader of great virtue. But there is a difference -- minuscule as it may be -- between wrong and just plain dumb. Every excuse is wrong, ... More >>

Pie-magination: 5 Improbable Pizza Pies

Considered from a local, regional, national and international perspective, the world is home to a great variety of pizzas. From authentic to fusion to deep dish to Sicilian-thin, the term "pizza" covers all manner of sins. I think that we owe it to ourselves, as a pizza-obsessed nation, to do bett ... More >>

Can Domino's Pull Off "Brooklyn-Style" Pizza?

No! 1000 percent, N-effing-O. Maybe my expectations were raised too high by the promise of hand-stretched, perfectly foldable crust, and by images of the flavorful, thin, crisp crust conjured by the word "Brooklyn." Or maybe it was the fact that I just wasn't drunk. Anyway I look at it -- my experi ... More >>

Health Department Roundup: Just the Facts, Mostly

Normally we go all Popeye Doyle on the inspection reports, doing things our way, asking for forgiveness rather than requesting permission. We'd even consider purchasing an ankle holster if we were allowed to rub up against girls while on the clock. (Just kidding, it's a quick-draw gimmick.) Today, t ... More >>

Hangover Smorgasbord from Aladdin's Mediterranean Cuisine

This week is 'Reader's Choice' at Fast Times. On the suggestion of commenter Helenafromworchester, I made a trip to Aladdin's Mediterranean Cuisine on Westheimer for take-out the day after a late night with friends at Jackson's Watering Hole. My husband had a hangover-hangover, while I had a designa ... More >>

American Parasite

Mitt Romney's years at Bain represent everything you hate about capitalism.

Lamar's Head Basketball Coach Pat Knight Rants Maniacally (w/ VIDEO)

Yep, that apple fell right by the tree.​It's not easy being the son of a legend, and then trying to follow in said legend's footsteps into the exact same vocation of choice. Pat Knight knows this. His father, Bobby Knight, garnered 902 career wins as a head coach. He also had dozens of epic ... More >>

Question of the Week: Is the Pizza Boomerang a Real Thing?

Caution: The video above is highly NSFW for reasons including but not limited to: a penis being cut off by a pizza boomerang in graphic detail. Watch at your own risk. Pizza Boomerang is the latest viral video making the rounds on YouTube and Twitter. (And, if your mom happens to have seen it, then ... More >>

Phillip Little: Four Arrested in Domino's Driver's Murder

Timothy Robinson and three others face capital murder charges.​Four people -- including a 15-year-old girl -- have been arrested for the November 2 murder of Domino's Pizza driver Phillip Little, Houston police said today. Little was shot in a robbery attempt near the intersection of Martin L ... More >>

Phillip Little, 40, Pizza Driver Shot During Robbery, Bayou Body Count No. 170

Pizza driver killed in robbery.​A Domino's deliveryman was shot and killed during an apparent robbery on the south side of town last night. Phillip Little, 40, was found slumped over his steering wheel after an accident at the intersection of Martin Luther King Boulevard and Canterway, police ... More >>

Health Department Roundup

​Some of the reasons city inspectors write up restaurants are oddly inexact. When we see stuff like, "Utensils designed to serve food not kept at proper 45-degree angle from serving tray/as shiny as they probably could be/free of roach droppings," we imagine bureaucrats taking secret pleasure ... More >>

Five Foods Experiencing Identity Confusion

My general food philosophy: if I want a corn muffin, I eat a corn muffin. If I want oysters, I eat oysters. But I guess I'm in the minority because judging from supermarket shelves, many people want corn muffins...that taste like oysters. There's a glut of products trying to be something they're no ... More >>

Rating Consumer Reports Top Ranked Frozen Pizzas

Frozen pizza can be delicious and photogenic: Amy's Cornmeal Crust 3 Cheese Pizza with mozzarella, Parmesan, and goat cheese.​Recently, Consumer Reports asked the question, "Can a frozen pizza truly satisfy anyone other than discriminating kids? In other words, you?" The answer: Yes. Among the ... More >>

A Domino's Convert

​Trust me, I am a champion of the SLGT movement. In fact, for my family's tradition of eating pizza on Christmas Eve I really tried to support local so that we could all grow together. So I called Daddy-O's and Lazaro's, and as the phone rang and rang, I soon realized that local business owner ... More >>

The Top 10 Google Searches for 2010: Food & Drink Edition

Google, you clever bastards. Making me hungry for Thanksgiving dinner all over again in December.​On a particularly creepy episode of Conspiracy Theory -- yes, the one with Governor Jesse Ventura and the Blond Ponytail of Better Days -- a cornered spokesperson for a government Fusion Center to ... More >>

Top 10 Fallen Fast Food Items

Much has been made in the past few weeks about the McRib, McDonald's exalted ground pork and barbecue sauce wonder. You may remember it first hitting America's mouths in the early '80s, not selling extremely well, and only coming back every now and then. It returned briefly in 1994 as the "Brontos ... More >>

Joe's Deli: As Simple As It Sounds

Almost as good as Wonder Bread and Kool Aid.​Joe's Deli 3729 W Alabama St Ste C I'm a sandwich guy, but I'm not fussy about it. I'm as thrilled with prosciutto and brie on Italian as I am with turkey and American cheese on Wonder Bread, especially if cherry Kool Aid is involved. While drivin ... More >>

Four Incredibly Stupid Beer Gimmicks

Hey, have you seen this stupid shit? That's right, Miller Lite has introduced the Vortex Bottle in hopes of lifting their flagging beer sales by convincing you that swishing around your beer as it pours somehow makes it taste better, as opposed to flatter. What slogans might they have rejected fo ... More >>

Houston Is Under Attack

Bedbugs threaten our slumber.

Apparently The Noid Was Unavailable for Questioning

No one can tell when a hot wing jones will overcome them. You might be sitting on the couch, watching a Saved by the Bell marathon, when bam, you get the fierce craving for spicy Buffalo goodness. When we've been broke and this happened, we've done some crazy things, like pour ranch sauce on our fin ... More >>

The Shameless Chef: Barbecue Cheeseburger Pizza

Chicks totally dig a custom pizza job.​ So the Super Bowl is coming up, and unless you live outside the borders of the United States, that's a pretty big deal. Even people who don't care anything for football will watch the Super Bowl, and this is the perfect opportunity for you to try out the ... More >>

Lonesome Onry and Mean: The Rockabilly Country Soul of Big Al Downing

Maybe the most successful African-American country artist of the post-Charley Pride period was Big Al Downing. Talk about a guy who could blur the line between country and soul. An affable Oklahoman, Downing had a huge baritone voice that could melt hearts. Downing's career began in rockabilly. Aft ... More >>

ACL 2009 Day Two: Who'll Stop the Rain?

Photo by Mark C. AustinThe Scabs​That was the question on Saturday, when downpours tested the drainage properties of the newly laid Zilker Park sod to test. Curiously, with the air still warm, the crowd seemed to take the growing swamp in stride, but you have to guess that with all the muddy-b ... More >>

Aftermath: Big Walter "The Thunderbird" Price's Birthday at the Big Easy

Reg Burns​While the indie-rock world dodged lightning strikes Sunday afternoon, Houston's blues community gathered inside the Big Easy Social and Pleasure Club to pay homage to its most elder statesman, Big Walter "The Thunderbird" Price. The venue was packed with dancers, drinkers and a plethora ... More >>

Almost A Millionaire: One man's brief stint in the spotlight

Highlights from the Blog at HOUSTONPRESS.COM

Who Wants To Be A Contestant On Who Wants To Be A Millionaire?

The producers of Who Wants to Be a Millionaire are coming to town Friday today to audition contestants for the show. Our Craig Hlavaty has already gone down this road before; here's his tale and some tips on how to get picked.Back in the summer of 2005, when I was slinging dough for Domino's and stu ... More >>

Ten Classic Restaurant Commercials from the 1980s

If you're a child of the '80s, much of your misspent youth was misspent in front of the television taking in shows like Mr. Wizard and Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles. But just as those classic TV shows from your childhood have remained with you all these years, so have the equally classic commercials. ... More >>

Places That Are Open -- Constantly Updated

Matt Lemmler

The Music of New Orleans

Turquoise Grill

Turkish Delight

Keira Get Your Gun

Domino chronicles the life of a model-turned-bounty hunter

Can't Hold a Candle to It

Candelari's Italian sausage pizza is a Washington Avenue wonder

Best Delivery

Best Mexican Bakery

El Bolillo Panaderia

Paris Matched

Laurier Café is turning out Parisian bistro food at Paris, Texas, prices

Best Thai Restaurant

Thai Cottage

Junk-Food Journalism

A new book detailing the "dark side of the all-American meal" could use a little more beef itself

Best Pizzeria

Star Pizza

The Food Chain

Meals on Montrose

News of the Weird

Rotation

Grown Up, Staying Up

Bo Knows

Abstraction Without Shame

Abstract painting has been said to be dead; at DiverseWorks, seven painters disagree