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Crawfish Borrachos at The Original Ninfa's on Navigation

When I go to the original Ninfa's on Navigation, I'm regularly tempted by the monthly specials, but inevitably I revert to my old favorites such as the tacos al carbon and the shrimp and chicken fajitas. Spring, however, is a time for change and growth. The last time I cowardly opted for the safe tr ... More >>

PSA: This Rat Fetus Was Not Found in Timmy Chan's Fried Rice

The Original Timmy Chan's on Martin Luther King Jr. Boulevard (a.k.a. Timmy Chan's Chicken & Rice) may have only been inspected by the City of Houston Health Department once since November 2010, but that inspection didn't turn up anything that we'd call remotely offensive. And that Timmy Chan's on M ... More >>

RIP Macy's/Foley's, 1947-2013: Pictures From The Wake

It started out as a Foley's turned into a Macy's and ended up a sad, empty hulk in the middle of downtown. The big blank block that served as a downtown department store for almost 66 years closed down over the weekend. We listed six oddities you may not have known about the store (A fallout shelt ... More >>

NBA All-Star Madness Closes Galleria

If you had any doubts that the NBA All-Star Game was a major event, you weren't at the Galleria today. And if you were at the Galleria, we hope you weren't crushed. Massive crowds packed every square inch of the mall today -- and the traffic outside was just as horrendous -- so officials closed it ... More >>

HISD Bus Crash Sends Student To Hospital

A Houston school district bus was involved in what officials are calling a "major accident" this morning, sending one student to the hospital with non-life threatening injuries. Three students were on the bus, headed to Scarborough High, when the accident occurred at Beechnut and Braeburn Valley ab ... More >>

Houston's Top 5 Punk Bars

5. LOLA'S DEPOT It it possible for a place to look run-down -- in a good way? Some who wax nostalgic about Lola's wasteland preeminence as the place to score drugs in the '80s now joke of it as a "neighborhood bar," offering such high-class amenities as ATM machines. Remnants of the old Lola's exi ... More >>

Houston Area Might See Some Winter Weather as Soon as Friday

It's so damn hot in Houston most of the time, we forget what cold weather feels like. Then, we get a week where it doesn't make it out of the 50s and we wish for warmer climates if only because frozen margaritas seem so much less appealing when it is 40 degrees outside. Right now, we're in the midst ... More >>

Karbach Tap Takeover Invades Houston Bars in 2013, Plus Hellfighter Bottles

You can hardly throw a rock in Houston these days without hitting a Karbach beer. Most larger grocery stores and liquor stores carry their canned beer 365 days a year. Hundreds of bars from The Hay Merchant down to local ice houses have their tap handles in their lineup of draft beer. It's an encour ... More >>

Newman's Own Skillet Meal a Saucy Take on Fettuccini

Newman's Own Chicken Fettuccini Alfredo ... where do I start? This was an item that caught my eye at the grocery store several weeks ago; one that I tossed into the cart almost as an afterthought. It's the kind of item I might heat up when I'm on my own for dinner, and don't want to dirty so much a ... More >>

Sip On Some Chick-Fil-A Haterade Tonight at Grand Prize Bar...for Charity

In the wake of Beaver's pro-gay rights, anti-Chick-Fil-A sandwich going national -- even the anchors on CBS This Morning were talking about the Chick-on-Chick Filet at the Houston icehouse this morning -- Grand Prize Bar is getting in on the action, too. The Montrose dive bar, which has lately been ... More >>

The Foodie's List of 100 Things to Eat Before You Die

"You may have tried only 20 or so" of the items on the "100 things to eat before you die" list that's been making the rounds on Facebook, wrote The Sun earlier this week. And while that may be true for a majority of typical eaters, I found that I'd eaten 92 out of the 100 items on the list -- many ... More >>

Pink Slipped: The 7 Best Artists To Be Dropped From Their Label

Once upon a time, record labels were the most important thing to an artist who chose to work within the music industry. They could make or break anyone and even world renowned artists knelt at the feet of their masters. Getting dropped from a label was, at one time, a death sentence. Even today man ... More >>

Texans Cheerleader Vote: Team Cleavage Vs. Team Modesty

The Houston Texans want your input on their new cheerleader candidates, just part of the highly scientific process used to decide who gets to take the field. You can view cheerleader video and photos and text your vote to the team. Examining the line-up, it seems clear there are two distinct schoo ... More >>

Shanice Lambert: Another Panhandle Teacher Accused of Sexual Misconduct

What in tarnation is going on in the schoolhouses on Texas's High Plains? The latest in the Shame Parade is Shanice Lambert, who looks much more glamorous on her Facebook page than in her Armstrong County mugshot. According to the Amarillo Globe-News, police in Childress accuse the 37-year-old teac ... More >>

Summer Fest Ticket Prices Go Up At 10 p.m.; More Talent "Soon-Ish"

Free Press Summer Fest is increasing ticket prices tonight, with a promise to compensate by adding more talent to the two-day music festival on the banks of Buffalo Bayou. According to FPSF's email blast this morning, the price of passes will go up at 10 p.m. tonight, and the festival will announce ... More >>

Trey Eric Sesler: YouTube Film Critic "Mr. Anime" Accused Of Killing Three Family Members

Trey Eric Sesler, a 22-year-old who styles himself "Mr. Anime" for his YouTube movie reviews, is in jail, accused of using a high-powered rifle to kill his parents and his brother. The murders were discovered Tuesday in the small town of Magnolia. Police found the bodies of parents Lawton Ray Sesle ... More >>

Kaylan Goodman: Houston Area Family Looking For Woman Who Disappeared With a Magazine Sales Crew

An Update to our Update: Kaylan is back in Bay City with her family. UPDATE: Goodman was located late Wednesday night by Fairmont City, Illinois, police, according to the Kingfisher Police Department. "We have verified her well being" through a phone conversation, the department stated. We hope to ... More >>

Happy 31st Birthday, Turducken: 8 Foods Born in 1980

Thirty-one is officially too old to try to learn how to use Photoshop.​Tomorrow, on 11-11-11, I will turn 31 years old. Last year, for my 30th birthday, my uncle sent me a Facebook message that contained only the following Pink Floyd quote and a "Happy Birthday" at the end: So you run and you ... More >>

Openings & Closings: Ménage à Foie

Photo courtesy of FacebookSomething much cooler is coming to the old Zula's space downtown...​Two big blows of bad news shook the food community this week: Yelapa Playa Mexicana announced its closure, and Moon Tower Inn decided to take a three-month break to remodel. The writing had been on t ... More >>

Dig This: Dig Dug, Bang Bangz, Los Skarnales, The Wiggins & Craig Kinsey

The current volume of local music is staggering, so Rocks Off wants to help you (and ourselves) keep up. Dig Dug​Dig This is back with another round of gems following some successful mining of the Internet. Here's another handful of local music acts for you to explore, including a few that yo ... More >>

Off the Wall: Burger Alternatives and Leaner Meats

Ginger Me​Last week, Kristen Majewski's "Five Healthy Burger Alternatives" didn't include ostrich, which is low in fat and cholesterol and high in calcium, protein and iron. Fat FattyBastard commented that I might be able to find an ostrich burger at Fuddrucker's, so I set out to do just that ... More >>

Kelly Clarkson Christening Galleria Microsoft Store Next Month

Behind These Hazel Eyes: A big Microsoft check.​Rebecca Black turned out to be a hoax, but the Galleria might still be getting a visit from a pop star soon. According to Chronicle technology columnist and blogger Dwight Silverman's blog this afternoon, the former American Idol winner will per ... More >>

More Local Music News Than Fighting Navy SEALs

It's not every week that Arcade Fire returns to the suburbs whose ennui inspired a Grammy-winning album, but it is every week that we bring a brimming local music roundup for all of our Rocks Off readers. Without further ado, we present the latest installment of Magnolia City Mixtape. ​Hot of ... More >>

Bill White Takes Big Lead Over Rick Perry (In Facebook)

Facebook: The road to Austin​Bill White may have been unable as yet to top Rick Perry in any political poll on the governor's race, but that hardly matters: White's winning the Facebook battle!!And that's very important, says the person who did a study of it."Numbers don't have an agenda or ideolo ... More >>

DJ Eddie Deville: Mastering Turntable Artistry; Pursuing Anesthesiology; Liking John Mayer

​ Pre-med. University of Houston. John Mayer. Atheist. Anesthesiology. These are all terms that aren't associated with hip-hop. Or could that change? Acres Homes' own Edwin Penn may change all that if he stays his course... or, should we say, passes his courses. Eddie, known better to the streets ... More >>

Please Add "Like" Rocks Off On Facebook; Win Dead Weather Tickets

So apparently there's this thing called social networking. These days it seems to be centered around a Web site called Facebook, which Rocks Off suspects you may have heard of. Actually, we've heard of it too and have had our own page for a minute now, but currently Rocks Off has the hood of our Fa ... More >>

What's Your Bra Color? Nah, You Can Do Better

Unless you're one of these ladies, we probably don't care about your bra color.​Black. Beige. Nude. Purple. Fuchsia. What do these colors have in common? Perhaps they resemble the spectrum of brilliance you projectile puked after a particularly steep, single-handed tab at Shot Bar. Good gues ... More >>

Five Signs You're Suffering From Internet Burnout

​It happens to the best of us. One minute, you're singing its praises, zealously licking some of its naughty bits not otherwise visible to the sun, offering up your most personal information like free fellatio, and spreading your virtual legs, letting it have its way with you. And sickeningly ... More >>

Update Your Facebook Status, Then Go Rob Someone

​For those of you still in the Facebook Is Utterly Useless camp, we're gonna attempt to pooh-pooh you now. That's right. Pooh-pooh with a capital P. 'Cause there ain't no arguing that Facebook is apparently good enough these days to bust you outta the slammer and clear your good name. When ... More >>

Unfollowed & Defriended: Online Rejection Sucks

​The hefty bovine heartily clearing the moon had nothin' on you when you located your closest chum from elementary school on Facebook. The only glee rivaling yours was that of the dish skippin' town with the spoon when your hometown sports hero followed you back on Twitter. But months later ... More >>

How to Trust Your Mate in the Digital Age

​Look. We couldn't miss the collective whoop of joyous philanderers worldwide when Al Gore sat down and decided to invent the Internet. Clandestine, illicit communication via password-protected inboxes on web platforms? On what dotted line can you sign your penis away, and how fast? Salacious ... More >>

Surprise Someone IRL. Via the Internet, That Is

​"Looks like there's gonna be an engagement party for you after all!" "There is? Not that Nate or I know of." "Was it supposed to be a surprise?" "I have no idea. I don't know what you're talking about." "Well, I got a Facebook invite from Cynthia, your co-worker." "I honestly don't kno ... More >>

Facebook Poll Says Killing Obama Isn't Okay

​Cyber stalkers, prolific e-haters, overzealous blog followers, Facebook poll developers and authors. Fine, fine company indeed, wouldn't you agree? But more notably, what do they all have in common? They're all enough to put a seriously debilitating quiver in your nether regions, and no, not the ... More >>

SPECIAL, ANNUAL CANADIAN EDITION

Twitter, Get Your Gun: Facebook Lite's in Your House

​Oh, Facebook.  Facebook, Facebook, Facebook.  Sit down.  We needsta chat for a spell. Looky here, Facebook.  So, yes, it's no secret that you're getting a bit pudgy, what with all the apps and the games and the quizzes and the incredibly confusing filters lining both side ... More >>

Social Distortion: Stuff Happened, Then Facebook 3.0 for iPhone Came Out

​You know, this week in current events really was a doozy, wouldn't you say?  Senator Ted Kennedy passed on to the crystal Kennedy camp in the afterlife, Dominick Dunne followed in his footsteps (ALERT: Old white dudes with cancer, don't walk under any ladders this week, o ... More >>

What Do Your iPhone Apps Say About You?

When you're an iPhone owner, not only are you better than everyone else (obvs), but the lifeblood of your technological slice of gadget heaven is your applications, or "apps," if you're nasty.  An integral part of your holy iPhone identity really shines through the apps you choose to rely on wh ... More >>

Social Distortion: Dear Social Media Swami

Actual swami not pictured.​Dear Social Media Swami,I think my girlfriend's social media obsession is out of control.  At any given time, she's either on the computer or checking her iPhone for the latest stuff happening on Twitter, Facebook, or whatever.  She hates being bothered ... More >>

Social Distortion: Declare Your Love In Five Easy Steps On the Internets

​Uh oh. You've got "Amazed" on repeat. You're in a positively radiant mood on Monday mornings, even before inserting your caffeine IV drip. Your tongue has never tasted a sweeter fruit than his kiss. Vomit! Wait, whoops. Guess who's in loooooooove? You are, you are! You know what that ... More >>

Dear Social Media Swami: Hey, Facebook Friend, Who Are You Again?

Actual swami not picturedDear Social Media Swami, People try to contact me on Facebook, we become friends, yada yada. I assume that it's just the "we went to the same college" thing and think nothing of it. Then they write me messages like we know/knew each other and I literally have no recol ... More >>

While You Weren't Tweeting: Now With More Harry Potter

C'mon, 'fess up. You spent early last week camped out in front of the Angelika in your Hogwarts uniform, awaiting the arrival of the new Harry Potter movie in theatres. Then you spent the rest of the week basking in the afterglow of Daniel Radcliffe's smoldering gaze, and engaging in heated discuss ... More >>

Social Distortion: The End-All, Be-All Cure For Your Social Media Sickness

You log into Facebook, and you're hit with the sudden pang of 172 unread messages in your inbox, 146 unread updates, 59 event invitations, and a partridge in a pear tree. Your Google Reader is uncomfortably lodged at 1000 unread, and it hasn't been touched in ages, sorta like your sexy bits. You ... More >>

Social Media Smackdown: Facebook vs. LinkedIn

They tell you landing a job via social media that won't trigger your gag reflex is a piece of cake. They share insider tips and tricks like Carrie and Samantha dishing blowjob techniques over Cosmos. They tell you to keep your nose clean, but if you can't, don't post photos of it online. So whe ... More >>

Annise Parker, The $5 Mayoral Candidate

Annise Parker's Facebook photoTaking a page from the Barack Obama playbook, Houston City Controller and mayoral candidate Annise Parker announced today that she's launching an "I Can Make a Difference" campaign on the Internet in which she's asking supporters to send her $5. Parker proposes to use ... More >>

Social Distortion: The Facebook Friend Inaugural Oath of Office

Adding folks to your posse of Facebook friends is far from an automated algorithm. Facebook often serves as the Internet's Final Frontier - you're either down with the innermost of highly personal circles, or you're merely relegated to the comparative impersonality of being a Twitter follower or Fl ... More >>

Better Watch What You're Putting On Your Facebook Page

Allegedly, more people use Facebook than e-mail, and during the last several months, Twitter became a verb. But for Corporate America, that could cause some problems, according to Houston attorney Chris Schaeper. "Twenty years ago, you might be having beers with an old frat buddy from college and ha ... More >>

A Call for More Honesty in Facebook Status Updates

I'll admit it...I'm as self-absorbed as the next person when it comes to writing Facebook status updates. I know no one really cares if I'm watching Larry King or filing my nails or whatever, yet for some reason I choose to update my status line constantly. Have you noticed that very few people se ... More >>

Facebook Hamstrings Whopper Sacrifice Application

It was easy to guess that Burger King's somewhat mean-spirited Whopper Sacrifice Facebook application was going to draw some kind of fire; less easy to guess was that the fire would be drawn from Facebook itself, because the application, to put it bluntly, worked too well. In the world of Whopper ... More >>

Miss Pop Rocks: Special Hurricane Ike Edition

Facebook Responds to the Texas Attorney General's Office