• Blogs

    May 30, 2014

    Donald Sterling's Punishment: Selling the LA Clippers for $2 Billion

    Ever since the audio surfaced of Los Angeles Clippers owner Donald Sterling's lambasting his girlfriend (who will now and forever be known as "V. Stiviano") for her inclination to post pictures of herself with African Americans, namely Magic Johnson, on her Instagram account, the saga of "What will ... More >>

  • Blogs

    December 24, 2013

    Five Christmas Songs That Will Totally Bum You Out

    Note: This article originally appeared in December 2010. Rocks Off brought it back for all you grinches out there. Happy Festivus! 5. Steve Earle & Emmylou Harris, "Christmas In Washington" Steve Earle recounts how he felt while we were gearing up to (sort of, almost, kind of, not really) elect Geo ... More >>

  • Blogs

    December 24, 2013

    Fan Fighting League! Cowboy Fan Fights Falcon Fan On MARTA Train

    A lot of angst this time of year for football fans. Think about it, even the richest of the rich have something to bitch about this time of year. The Broncos beat the Texans on Sunday, but lost pass rusher extraordinaire Von Miller for the rest of the season to an ACL tear. The Seahawks are on thei ... More >>

  • Blogs

    December 23, 2013

    Old School Christmas: 9 Gifts That Got (Get?) Kids Out of the House and In Better Shape w/Video

    Since the advent of video games, kids have increasingly spent time inside huddled around game consoles. Even for an older guy like me, I grew up with Atari and early handheld video games that were pretty damn addictive, but nothing like the sophisticated games out today that not only look amazing, b ... More >>

  • Blogs

    December 17, 2013

    Zapruder Analysis Of The Drunk Santa Brawl At SantaCon 2013

    For centuries now, people of all ages, races, creeds, and geography have loved to drink. Not all of us you, but a lot of us you. Wine, beer, hard liquor, illegal moonshine, as long as it has alcohol in it, fill 'er up! To that end, it never ceases to amaze me the various ways that we will decorate ... More >>

  • Blogs

    December 16, 2013

    Zapruder Analysis Of My Trip To Santa's Wonderland

    "Take care of your 24." That saying comes from charismatic second year University of Connecticut basketball coach Kevin Ollie. Basically, what it means is that there are only 24 hours in every day, so make every minute count, budget your time, stay balanced, and make sure to live life to the fulle ... More >>

  • Blogs

    December 12, 2013

    The Rocks Off 200: The Excitable Boys of Another Run

    Welcome to The Rocks Off 200, our portrait gallery of the most compelling profiles and personalities in the far-flung Houston music community -- a lot more than just musicians, but of course they're in there too. See previous entries in the Rocks Off 100 at this link. Who? On the Rocks Off 200, we ... More >>

  • Blogs

    November 21, 2013

    Texan Fans Rejoice! CBS' Dan Dierdorf To Retire At Season's End

    Rare is the Texans home game that I am not in attendance in person at Reliant Stadium. In seven seasons of covering the team, I can count on one hand how many games I've missed and had to watch on television instead, and I believe the most recent one was the Texans 43-13 win over what eventually b ... More >>

  • Blogs

    February 25, 2013

    Dude Crashes SUV Into Roof, Lives To Tell The Tale

    Is it Festivus? Because there sure was a Festivus miracle early Sunday morning on the north side of the county. Police say a 24-year-old man was likely speeding (ya think?) when he hit a sloped embankment about 2:15 a.m. Sunday and went airborne. His SUV clipped the roof of one house and then thud ... More >>

  • Blogs

    February 11, 2013

    Twitter War! The Iron Sheik Calls Out Arian Foster!

    I've mentioned in this space a few times, during the 2011 NFL season I did a weekly show with Texans running back Arian Foster on Yahoo! Sports Radio. In my five years and change in talk radio, those sessions with him were some of the more fun moments I've had doing radio. The first few weeks we di ... More >>

  • Blogs

    December 28, 2012

    10 Cool & Cheap Weekenders: December 28-30

    Hayes Carll's Burlesque Circus and Sideshow Freakout House of Blues, December 28 Singer-songwriter Hayes Carll's songs are populated by widescreen people of oddity and quirk, so it makes total sense for him to put his own special twist on the holidays. At Friday's House of Blues free-for-all, Carll ... More >>

  • Blogs

    December 26, 2012

    NFL Playoff Scenarios: A Guide To This Sunday

    Week 17 of the NFL season is upon us this weekend, and while there are still plenty of moving (or potentially moving) parts left to be slotted, the one thing we are sure of is that in the NFC the Atlanta Falcons will have a first round bye and home field throughout the playoffs. The Texans have to ... More >>

  • Blogs

    December 24, 2012

    Texans-Vikings: 4 Winners, 71,688 Losers

    There were 71,688 (mostly) Texan fans in Reliant Stadium on Sunday. It's been a while since they've trudged back out to the Blue Lot feeling like they did on Sunday after the Minnesota Vikings' methodical 23-6 dismantling of the home team. The Packers game earlier this year while unacceptable was un ... More >>

  • Film

    December 20, 2012

    Films of 2012: Ten Best Films of 2012

    Just because you live in Houston doesn't mean you can't see all these films.

  • Blogs

    December 27, 2011

    Gothic Council Makes Its News Year's Resolutions

    Well, Christmas is over, as is Festivus for the rest of us, and now 2012 is barreling down at us like Donkey Kong threw it. Some people say that this year will be humanity's last, but since we say that as often as we can we're not too worried about it. Personally, we think the Mayans were just too b ... More >>

  • Blogs

    December 13, 2011

    Top 5 Seasonal Commercial Holiday Snacks

    Photo by Joanna O'LearyThe Breakfast of Champion...Elves.​Choosing my favorite commercial Halloween snacks was pure pleasure. Compiling a similar Top Five for the Christmas/Hanukkah/Kwanzaa/Festivus season was fun but pretty darn overwhelming. Nearly every brand offers a holiday shape/color/fl ... More >>

  • Blogs

    October 18, 2011

    Justin Bieber's Voice Changes Just In Time For Christmas Album

    "Say shawty, Merry Christmas, or whatever year-end holiday greeting that makes you happy." ​Children and adults alike are getting their holiday wish granted early this year, and they don't have to wait until Hanukkah, Kwanzaa, Festivus or even Christmas morning to receive it. Justin Bieber's v ... More >>

  • Blogs

    April 28, 2011

    Five Presidents Who Could Kick Chuck Norris's Ass

    Abe Lincoln: Let's get rrrrready to rrrrumble​In our continuing series of scholarly meditations on the United States Presidency, we now bring you a list of five presidents who could kick the crap out of Chuck Norris. Of note: only one of the top five served after 1908, although two honorable m ... More >>

  • Blogs

    February 24, 2011

    Joshua Lee Joehlin: Porter Man's Religion Is "Redneck"

    Smoking GunA man's gotta have a code​Joshua Lee Joehlin, of the Montgomery County town of Porter, got himself arrested in Florida recently, the Smoking Gun reports. As the above form shows, the local cops asked him his religion and he answered forthrightly: "Redneck."

  • Blogs

    December 31, 2010

    Real Food Company in IAH

    ​While you and yours were airing grievances on Festivus, I was flying the friendly skies on a single-day round trip, chasing Platinum status before 2010 elapsed. Free airline food has gone the way of the dodo unless you're sitting in First Class. Fortunately, the MSY (New Orleans) to D-FW ci ... More >>

  • Blogs

    December 31, 2010

    Openings & Closings: December 2010

    Photo by Farhan AhmedWe bid arrivederci to Amici this month.​The best thing about December wasn't the Christmas presents, the Hanukkah donuts or the Festivus pole. It was the fact that, citywide, restaurant openings far outweighed restaurant closures this month. That's something to be thankful ... More >>

  • Blogs

    December 24, 2010

    Merry Christmas and 4 WTF Questions About Christmas Specials (w/ video)

    Yeah, my dad's kind of a jerk​First, I want to wish all of you a very Merry Christmas (or Festivus or Hanukkah or whatever you celebrate this time of year)! It's definitely a time to be thankful, and I want to use this space to thank everyone who clicks on my stuff here on Hair Balls and espe ... More >>

  • Blogs

    December 15, 2010

    Measure Of America: Houston Lags Behind

    We're tenth out of 10​The American Human Development Project, which sounds like something you'd donate to for Festivus, has completed a survey ranking the top 10 metropolitan areas in the nation on their well-being. Coming in 10th place: Us. "Measure of America" looks at health, educational ... More >>

  • Blogs

    November 29, 2010

    Houston Texans -- Cortland Finnegan Is A Punk Ass Bitch

    Down goes Finnegan!! Down goes Finnegan!!​''I want to apologize to the organization, our owner and my teammates. What happened out there today wasn't me. I just lost my cool. I wish I could take back what happened. I can't. It's over and done with now. I'm pretty sure I'll be disciplined. I'll ... More >>

  • Blogs

    September 22, 2010

    Duane Brown -- I'm The One Guy Saying Something Nice About You

    Duane Brown: We're not jumping on the blame train​"I vow to learn from this mistake and be a better player and teammate because of it." -- Duane Brown In May, when the news came down that Brian Cushing had been suspended for violating the league's substance-abuse policy, the reaction among many ... More >>

  • Blogs

    May 19, 2010

    Game Time: Richard Justice vs David Anderson In A Steel Cage Studio Match

    Photo courtesy 1560 The GameAnd another thing, Anderson...​In radio, sometimes you have good shows, sometimes you have bad shows. Occasionally, if you're lucky and/or good, you have a moment happen on air where you go "Okay, our audience didn't get that anywhere else on the dial this afternoon." ... More >>

  • Blogs

    December 22, 2008

    Festivus Miracle Meatloaf

    If you aren't preparing to celebrate Christmas in your household this week, then there's a good chance that you are instead erecting a Festivus pole and warming up to face Uncle Joey for this year's Feats of Strength.  And since you needed a Festivus miracle last year to pin the old m ... More >>

  • Blogs

    December 20, 2007

    Drenched in Blog: Radio Blah Blah

    Remember terrestrial radio? Cool terrestrial radio? That doesn’t play Fergie and Fall Out Boy all day? It still exists; you just have to seek it out. On Monday, Christmas Eve to all you non-Festivus revelers, Drenched in Blog will be sitting in from noon till 3 p.m. with Mr. Brad, the news direc ... More >>

  • Blogs

    December 5, 2006


    The holidays are a special time for family and friends to come together in a show of magical unity and optimism. The whole human race becomes as one with a sense of childlike wonderment and admiration for all fellow men. But for a few musician dirt bags, it's a time to whore out their wares for holi ... More >>