George Carlin

Let's Get Greasy

The 10 best fried chicken joints in Houston.

5 Cool & Cheap Weekenders: December 7-9

Come See My Dead Person Walters, December 8 The gypsy-punks in Come See My Dead Person have come out of hibernation to release an eponymous new 13-song set of songs. The manic pickin', the boisterous drinking anthems, and strange old-world stank are here in spades, with the proverbial fur really f ... More >>

Skeleton Dick

Why Screw Caps Stink, Why They Rock and a Pinot Grigio I Dig

"Bartender, bartender! My wine smells like farts!" No, this wasn't a George Carlin routine. It was me (and my not so inner wine nerd) as I sat at a bar at one of Houston's most swank joints, waiting to be seated for dinner. Honestly, I wasn't surprised that my wine smelled like a fart: It came fr ... More >>

Grey Victory: A Playlist for the Hiroshima Peace Memorial Ceremony

In 1945, the Japanese city of Hiroshima became the first target of a nuclear weapon ever. The United States called for the unconditional surrender of the country at the end of World War II, an ultimatum that was ignored. In response, we deployed a weapon that killed between 90,000 and 166,000 Japane ... More >>

True Blood: God, Gotye, and Why Neither Matters

Alan Ball was known for his masterful use of music in Six Feet Under. He's lost none of his touch when it comes to his current HBO series, True Blood -- which happens to be set in the Louisiana swamps, not terribly far from Houston. So, the vampires have decided that they are going to try and rule ... More >>

Know Your Local Media: Col. St. James on the Texas Radio Hall of Fame and Naked Strippers on the KLOL Console

Getting into the Texas Radio Hall of Fame is a big deal when you consider the company includes Wolfman Jack and George Carlin among others. One local dee jay, Colonel St. James of 93.7 the Arrow, is among them. He has been on air since the 1970s and has worked at just about every rock and roll stati ... More >>

Who Is Paul McCartney?!: Rocks Off Tells You

So, it's the day after the Grammys, and you may still be wondering who that "hella old" man with the droopy eyes playing the weird left-handed bass was on the telecast last night. You know, the guy next to the guy from Foo Fighters and that one other ancient-looking man in the tight jeans who looks ... More >>

Top 5 Farts in Video Game History with Video Evidence of He Who Dealt It

Everyone farts. Even that virginal cheerleader you had the crush on in high school began her day with a triumphant blast of her trumpet. It's a fact of life as stinky and socially irrelevant as The Facts of Life, and to us modern hepcats we can't see anyone making a big deal out of it. But (ha ha) ... More >>

Last Night: Concrete Blonde At Fitzgerald's

Photos by Abrahan Garza​Concrete Blonde, Girl In a Coma Fitzgerald's October 30, 2011 Aftermath was as bummed as anyone when Concrete Blonde, after a few fits and starts, apparently called it quits back in 2006. We also kicked ourselves repeatedly when we were unable to make any of the dates ... More >>

ACL Find: The Cave Singers At The Vista Equity Tent

Craig Hlavaty​ We found ourselves in front the Cave Singers on Friday afternoon with a few hundred folks, escaping the Sun and the cheerfulness and pomp of the other bands going at the same time (Big Boi, Foster The People) for some dark art at the Vista Equity Tent. About halfway through t ... More >>

Pop Rocks: The 5 Prayers We Didn't Hear at Perry's Rally

Rick Perry has forgotten the riddle of steel.​As you may be aware, Governor Rick Perry held a prayer rally last Saturday at Reliant Stadium. Dubbed "The Response" (and redubbed "Prayerapalooza" by some, or "Reliant's Preseason Concession Test Run" by us just now), the event attracted some 30,0 ... More >>

Gloria Gaynor, Disco's Ultimate Survivor, Discusses That Song

​You know "I Will Survive." Everybody knows "I Will Survive." Aliens know "I Will Survive." Dogs know "I Will Survive." Dogs who are aliens know "I Will Survive." Gloria Gaynor's 1979 disco anthem, written by the same producers who wrote "Heaven Must Be Missing An Angel" and "Reunited," has l ... More >>

The 10 Worst Things Texas Has Given To The Modern World

It's not nature's way, it's Houston's​If we were to list all the great, terrific things Texas, Our Texas has given to civilization, we would be here all day. (Two words: Jessica Simpson.) Unfortunately, Texas has also gifted America and the world with some things the world and America would n ... More >>

Pop Rocks: One Of Those "Good News/Bad News" Things

Only this time, no cropped shirts.​Or maybe even "Okay News/Bad News," depending on your feelings regarding San Dimas High School football. That's right, the rumors you've heard may or may not be true in that a third Bill and Ted movie might or might not be getting made: Keanu Reeves has be ... More >>

5 Things I Learned Photographing 100 Houston Restaurants

Photo by Jeff BalkeOne of my more successful shots at Olives Martini Bar & Grille in Sugar Land​George Carlin once described the phrase "fussy eater" as a euphemism for "big pain in the ass." When I was young, I was a big pain in the ass. Don't get me wrong, I have always loved food. I just di ... More >>

For The National Day Of Prayer: Five Invocations For (Almost) Any Occasion

If nothing else, pray for poor shrinking Alaska.​The good news is, President Obama didn't cancel the National Day of Prayer, as was alleged by e-mails sent by a few of my dimmer relations over the last few years. The bad news is, it's still pretty goddamned hard to find an appropriate bit of Scrip ... More >>

Bill Hicks, Still Dead 15 Years Later

Wholly influential and ridiculously honest stand-up comic Bill Hicks died fifteen years ago today, succumbing to lung cancer. Ironically he had always opined that that was how he would meet his end. Smoking seemed to be his obsession and he was rarely seen onstage not puffing away. The comedian move ... More >>

Four Catholic Schools Closing, Robbing Future Generations of Ruler-Wielding Nun Stereotypes

Maybe it's just the 12 years of Catholic school in me, but it's always sad to see one of these tradition-bound institutions close.And now four of them are to be shut in the Houston area.The Archdiocese of Galveston-Houston announced that, on the heels of last year's shutdown of Mt. Carmel High, the ... More >>

Houston Turns Back to Tap Water

That stuff flowing from the faucet is safe, cheap and environmental

George Carlin: Baseball vs. Football

Over the Weekend: Mugsy's, Big Easy, SW Foodservice Expo, Tom Waits and Astros

George Carlin

Comedian’s anger still funny after all these years

New DVD Releases

Our top DVD picks scheduled for release this week

Funny Business

Once upon a time Houston was a hot spot for comedy clubs. Now it's anybody's guess on who'll turn out on any given night

Our top DVD picks for the week of March 1

Yet Another John Evans

Kickin' the Tires

Pixar's latest is no lemon, but it does have that used-Cars smell

Jesus Saves

Sarah Silverman speaks the unspeakable. And funny? Oh, hell, yes.

Carlin the Shots

Fresh outta rehab, grouchy George is here to spread his vitriol

Working Blue. And Brown.

Inside the dirtiest joke ever told is a nugget of unadulterated joy

Dressing the Part

Michelle Ellsworth's ED will save your id

Jersey Hurl

For Kevin Smith, growing up means selling out

Groupie Grooves

Little Feat can only hope to receive the same "welcome" they got here 31 years ago

Fanboy Theater

Jay and Silent Bob feeds the addictions of Kevin Smith junkies

Wading for Godot

Allison arrived in a flood of thoughts -- mattress rafts, murky thigh-deep water and the sudden flotsam of family life rushing out the back door

Honor Thy Elders

Hard as a Rock

Letters

Press Picks