Harry Potter

10 of Our Favorite Parody Songs to Celebrate the Day They Became Fair Use

On this day in 1994 the Supreme Court of the United States ruled that parodies, commercial or non-commercial, do not violate copyright law. 2 Live Crew had applied for permission to parody Roy Orbinson's "Oh Pretty Woman," but were refused. They made the song anyway, and after a quarter of a million ... More >>

Gothic Council: Was Christian Death's Rozz Williams an Overhyped Douchenozzle?

One of the functions of the Gothic Council is to rule on matters of Goth-point attribution. Think of us as professor McGonagall awarding or deducting points at Hogwarts... with that act mattering exactly as much to the real world as it did in the Harry Potter books. Recently, our own Batty posted ... More >>

Obert Skye: Potterwookie

Knights of the Fire Kingdom: "I Dunno Why Fire Is Awesome"

It's a well-known fact that most band names are essentially gobbledygook, but here at Rocks Off we're trying hard to find meaning in the oddest monikers. I was sitting in my office about to begin the night's drinking when Roky Moon and BOLT's Aaron Echegaray came in without knocking. He looked fair ... More >>

For President's Day: The Best Movie Portrayals of 15 Presidents

Portraying presidents on screen is always tricky. Crass imitation makes the thing look like a comedy skit, but completely ignoring the mannerisms and voice that people know doesn't work either. There have been some laughingly inept acting jobs when it comes to the 44 people who have been the countr ... More >>

The 10 Most Iconic John Williams Scores Ever

Today John Williams turns 80 years old, and the prolific composer has packed in a lot of work in the past five decades as one of the most iconic movie music makers to lead an orchestra. No doubt you have been enthralled, enraptured and enfrightened (not a word) by his collaborations with George Luca ... More >>

Gothic Council Makes Its News Year's Resolutions

Well, Christmas is over, as is Festivus for the rest of us, and now 2012 is barreling down at us like Donkey Kong threw it. Some people say that this year will be humanity's last, but since we say that as often as we can we're not too worried about it. Personally, we think the Mayans were just too b ... More >>

Looking Glass: Rock Music's Five Most Famous Four Eyes (Other Than Buddy Holly)

Holly had no idea what he was starting.​The Wall Street Journal wrote an interesting article about Buddy Holly's optometrist. That's not something most people would think about when it comes to music, but fashion has been significantly influenced over the years by music. In much the same way C ... More >>

A Scary Good Time

The Houston Press Guide to What's Happening This Hallowen

A Scary Good Time

The Houston Press Guide to Halloween

Polarizing Playhouse

Readers react to River Oaks splurge.

Saturday Night: Roky Moon & BOLT! At Fitzgerald's

Photos by Jim Bricker​Roky Moon & BOLT! CD release Fitzgerald's July 30, 2011 11:54 p.m.: Question: What the fuck good is a smartphone if it dies every 14 minutes? 11:54:15: Oh, sorry. Some info: We're here at the album release party for American Honey, the second album from Houston's brilli ... More >>

Top 10 Texas Movie Soundtracks

​This weekend, as the rest of the world catches Harry Potter mania for (perhaps) the final time, Houston gets a serious dose of Urban Cowboy nostalgia. Theater Under the Stars' production of the Tony-nominated 2003 musical - which The New York Times called "a conclusive demonstration that it's ... More >>

Final Destination

Harry Potter — franchise king, hero of a generation — fights his last battle.

Before Harry Potter, There Was Dr. John Dee...

​History is full of mysterious magicians. The modern world gives us Anton LaVey, Gerald Gardner and Aleister Crowley. In the ancient world you had Edward Kelley, Nicolas Flamel, and the Count of St. Germain. Of all those illustrious names, however, the name of Dr. John Dee stands out from the ... More >>

True Blood: Jinx Titanic & Super 8 Cum Shot for Dinner

Alan Ball was known for his masterful use of music in Six Feet Under. He's lost none of his touch when it comes to his current HBO series, True Blood - which happens to be set in the Louisiana swamps, not terribly far from Houston. ​The title of this week's column maybe one of the grossest th ... More >>

Pop Rocks: By the Dumb's Early Light

Apu chose an alternate path to citizenship​There's a scene in The American President -- Aaron Sorkin's pre-West Wing exercise in wishful liberalism -- when President Shepherd (Michael Douglas) describes America as "advanced citizenship." It's a nice thought, especially in the fantastical conte ... More >>

App of the Week: Waze

Thanks to Waze, I know foxybarrel, whoever that is, got stuck in traffic on 59.​App: Waze Platforms: iPhone, Android, BlackBerry (beta only, Windows Mobile Web site: Waze.com Cost: Free Houstonians know their traffic like Seattleites know their heroin coffee or heaved aquatic animals. In othe ... More >>

How Gangrene Led To The Conductors' Baton

​Conductors and wizards have a lot in common. Both are usually older men, are greatly respected and feared and, most importantly, both use wands to work their magic. But just as the wands of the Harry Potter world have supplemented the staves of J.R.R. Tolkein's Middle Earth-style wizards, so ... More >>

Relax: FBI Looking for Impatient Bank Robber

Impatient robber is impatient​In October, we wondered what other manners infractions the FBI might levy against future bank robbers having already accused them of sloppy dress, chubbiness and simply being rude. We have our answer: impatience. According to the FBI, the suspect (seen in the pho ... More >>

George W. Bush's Fifth Ward River Oaks Book-Signing Sold Out

George W. Bush: Ask him about his belt​Currently unemployed former Houstonian George W. Bush will be in town this week to sign copies of his book, offering customers a rare chance to pay full price for Decision Points before it hits the cutout bins. He's appearing in an obscure, out-of-the-wa ... More >>

Early Voting Begins: Five Reasons To Get It Out Of The Way

The Harris County ballot is about as long as this, and not was gripping​Early voting began today in Harris County and elsewhere, as voters and candidates finally hit the home stretch for the very bizarre Campaign 2010.Voting early is usually a good idea; here in Houston it makes more sense than ev ... More >>

So Who Hasn't Gotten Naked?

W Magazine: All about the art.​In the latest news from the Land That Talent Forgot, Kim Kardashian has gone starkers for the November issue of W Magazine: Kim Kardashian has bared all on the cover of a fashion magazine. The reality star, who turns 30 on Oct. 21, appears nude on W Magazine's ... More >>

Rice University Residential College Guarantee: Not All Students Get What They Pay For

Photo by SkinnyOrangeCatRice: Getting crowded in here​Note to incoming Rice University undergrads (and their parents) expecting the full "residential college" experience: Be sure to read everything that you get on Rice letterhead.One of the universities' primary selling points is its residential c ... More >>

Top 5 Songs On Jacob Black Of Twilight's iPod

​Well, today is the day Twilight: Eclipse is released, and a million voices are screaming, "Honey, do we hafta?" Since Gothtopia already runs a column on vampires - and may we add that Bill Compton would put some serious maim in Edward Cullen's sparkle motion? - today we're gonna talk about w ... More >>

Upcoming Events

​Saint Patrick's day is right around the corner. And whether you're going to drown yourself in a vat of green beer this Saturday or wait like a proper Irish-wannabe until next Wednesday itself for your corned beef and hash fix, we've put together a guide to all the best St. Paddy's events, par ... More >>

Disney's A Christmas Carol

Ebenezer Scrooge is spitting mad

Disney's A Christmas Carol

Ebenezer Scrooge is spitting mad

Werewolves Got Fingered: The 5 Worst Movies (Besides Twilight: New Moon) With the Best Soundtracks

​Good news, all you fans of condensed screen versions of self-indulgent Mormon vampire pseudo-erotic clit-tease fantasies: Twilight: New Moon is being released in only eight days. Rocks Off, accustomed to scorn from literary snobs for his steadfast support of the Harry Potter series, actually pick ... More >>

Five Decent Bands Named After Star Wars Terminology

www.myspace.com/aerosith"If this is a consular ship, where is the ambassador?": Aerosith​ Since the release of the first Star Wars in 1977, through the subsequent sequels and disappointing prequels, pop culture has been awash in Force-related mania. People name their children Luke and Leia, family ... More >>

Social Distortion: Getting Off the Grid in Texas, Sorta Kinda

​You've probably heard the expression "getting off the grid" more times than you can shake a BlackBerry at.  These days, completely eliminating yourself from civilization (temporarily, mind you; for other self-removals, please see here immediately) is a task almost exclusively reserved ... More >>

Something Old, Something New at La King's in Galveston

Photos by Katharine Shilcutt​A newly reopened La King's on Galveston's Strand looks for all the world like the inside of Florean Fortescue's Ice Cream Parlour, the fanciful sweet shop from the Harry Potter novels. Wood floors moan softly underfoot while marble counters seem to glow from with ... More >>

Sonidos Y Mas: Marcio Local

Ernest Barteldes Marcio Local Says Don Day Don Dree Don Don: Adventures in Samba Soul www.luakabop.comDuring the late '60s and early '70s, Brazilian songwriters like the late Tim Maia and Jorge Ben became increasingly frustrated with the creative limitations of samba, and also felt out of place wit ... More >>

Paranormal Signing Night

Web exclusive!

Matt Braunger

A comedian warns of the dangers of owls

The Bourne Ultimatum, December Boys, Interview, Undead or Alive

Harris County librarians and UT Longhorn football players' arrests

Send in the librarians!!

Rockets Should Improve, But Will It Matter?

Dear Diary

Don't Believe the Hype

Despite a nonexistent marketing campaign, Cuarón's latest is not to be missed

Unreal Estate

Cartoon kids poke around Spielberg's Monster House

Here's Your Insight, Pal

James Redfield's Prophecy is one divine mess

Everybody in tha Chamber

Letters

By the Wayside

This weird school will wow kids

Digging for Treasure

With Holes, Disney serves up more than the usual kiddie fare

The Year of Living Dangerously

Cinema 2002 counterbalanced a treacherous world

Boo Who?

Monsters, Inc. opens the door to a world so good it's scary

Spellbound

In its reincarnation, Spellbinders stays true to its original policy of sticking with national talent