Subject: Jay Leno

• Letters

  March 25, 1999

• Guitar Shorty

  November 13, 2006

• Jay Leno Predicted That Diet-Related Jail Escape

  July 24, 2008

• Please Don’t Take My SportsCenter

  August 27, 2008

• Low and Outside

  Welcome to the ballpark. And brown fields and barren expanses of a still-not-rejuvenated section of downtown.

  March 30, 2000

• Party Like It's 1982

  The Gatsby's Sauza Cosmopolitan

  December 13, 2001

• Mr. Saturday Night

  Darrell Hammond makes a good impression at the Laff Stop

  June 23, 2005

• Continental's Vegetable-Fuel Flight A Success

  It's safe to come out from the bunker now -- the vegetable-fuel jet has landed safely at Intercontinental.A passenger-less Continental 737, half-fueled with regular stuff and half-fueled with fuel made from biofuel, took off from IAH a little after noon and spent almost two hours flying over the Gulf.No problems were reported; in fact the biofuel -- derived from algae -- was a little more efficient than the regular jet fuel, Continental officials said.Here's what Jay Leno will say about it tonig

  January 7, 2009

• Heeeeere's Branford!

  May 4, 1995

• Letters

  January 4, 1996

• Harmonica Half-Pint

  January 25, 1996

• Static

  May 2, 1996

• Rice's Nanocars Are Cooler Than Ever

  Rice has been among leaders in developing nanocars, which are even smaller than Cooper Minis, although they probably have more leg room and are less annoying to look at.Now they've made another breakthrough -- they've gotten the things to move at room temperature. Previously the nanocars only rolled at temperatures of 200 degrees Celsius (if we were Jay Leno, we'd insert some remark here about how that meant they could only wok on a Houston freeway in August, am I right?)Rice's Stephan Link says

  February 2, 2009

• Dish

  July 16, 1998

• News of the Weird

  December 31, 1998

• Simba's Pride

  January 21, 1999

• Spade and Neutered

  April 22, 1999

• I Have a Problem With The Hills. Like a Drug Problem.

  Photo courtesy of VlastulaSeriously.  Why do I torture myself?  Why do I find myself creating an appointment television relationship with MTV's reality show, The Hills?  And by reality I mean as real as Heidi Montag's tits.  Frankly, I think it's pretty much basically sick to be a thirtysomething married woman who is so deeply obsessed with a show that follows a bunch of vapid, rich Los Angelitos in their early 20s who are rich because they are vapid.  (Make sense

  April 9, 2009

• Juliana Hatfield: How to Walk Away

  September 18, 2008

• No Germ Lab for You

  Texans Get Dissed

  August 21, 2008

• Lisa Lampanelli

  March 13, 2008

• Tornado Burger

  December 20, 2007

• Loco Comedy Jam

  Mike Robles heads up Latino laugh-fest

  July 26, 2007

• Really Good Sax

  June 8, 2006

• Fly Me to the Moon

  Astronaut Farmer dares to dream

  February 22, 2007

• A True Horror Classic

  December 21, 2006

• Impossibly Passable

  November 2, 2006

• Voter Fraud

  Barry Levinson wags the dog again, but his bark is worse than his bite

  October 12, 2006

• The Reel Truth

  Hollywood claims the sky is falling. To which we say Puh-lease.

  December 22, 2005

• Just One Hitch

  Will Smith helps others find love, though probably not with this movie

  February 10, 2005

• Bittersweet Symphony

  The Art Guys inject some color into Bluebeard's Castle

  January 13, 2005

• Bush Beer

  Dubya leads a pint-glass race for president at the Flying Saucer

  October 28, 2004

• Serenade in the Sand

  Dromedaries bond over string music in a refreshing new docudrama

  July 8, 2004

• Torque Out

  Motorcycle sound and fury signify nothing -- but do kinda rock

  January 15, 2004

• Farrelly Mediocre

  The idiots what brung you Dumb and Dumber ain't funny no more

  December 11, 2003

• Fear Factor

  But just think, no one hates TV more than Trent Lott

  December 26, 2002

• Late-Night Access

  Packrat thinks Leno is after its stash

  September 5, 2002

• Patti Smith

  Land (1975-2002) (Arista)

  May 9, 2002

• Natalie MacMaster

  Wednesday, January 30

  January 24, 2002

• This Thing On?

  Jamie Foxx brings his Ugly Wanda shtick to town

  December 27, 2001

• All Joking Aside

  March 23, 2000

• Urban Comedian

  Anthony Clark at the Laff Stop

  August 12, 1999

• Taking the Heat

  April 8, 1999

• Who Do We Have to Blow Around Here to Get a Lady in Late Night?

  Okay, fine. We can deal with not having a lady president (still), but with the recent overflow of testicle-wearing late night hosts, it got me thinking, why no late night lady hosts?Joan Rivers tried once and was ridiculed (and yeah, Joan isn't my favorite lady comedian of all time, but come on, it's not like she's Chevy Chase), but there haven't been many women on the late night radar over the years. Now View host Joy Behar is being given some sort of chat deal. Only problem is it's at 8 p.

  June 25, 2009

• Turning the Screw: Killa Kyleon, Chamillionaire, Wendy Williams, 50 Best Rap Albums of the '00s, Drake, Weezy, Chris Brown, UGK, etc.

  Welcome back to Turning the Screw, Rocks Off's weekly rap post. It probably won't rhyme, at least most of the time. E-mail tips to introducingliston@gmail.com. Thanks, homies. Single of the Week: Killa Kyleon, "Ego" (remix) P.S. Kyleon is one of Houston's best remixers. Remember his "A Milli" remix? Or his "Paper Planes" freestyle? Wire To Wire Chamillionaire held everyone's feet to the fire before he released Mixtape Messiah 7, the final installment of the series. Brisco Pistol got his shit

  August 10, 2009

• Now You Can Watch The State Board Of Education Hijinks Live!! On Your Computer

  ​Television just got a lot more entertaining this week. And we're not talking about the Jay Leno show.The State Board of Education announced today that it will be televising its committee meetings for the world to see. (A new law requires them to do so, but we like to think it's just civic-mindedness on their part.)To be pedantic, they won't be on television, per se. But the meetings will be on the Net, which is the next best thing. The kidz don't watch anything unless it's on their computers,

  September 14, 2009

• The Week In TV: Seriously. You Need to Watch Community

  I know you think the only event of note last week in TV Land was the sad departure of Tom DeLay from Dancing With the Stars. But Dazzle Me Dreamy's punk out was only the beginning. NBC canceled Southland, which is officially the first victim of uber-hack Jay Leno's primetime talk show. Granted, the cop show wasn't stellar, but it was consistently good; it was basically The Wire: Lite with prettier and whiter people. But it had solid stories, and more importantly, it was the kind of quasi-su

  October 12, 2009

• Cutout Bin: Insane Clown Posse Predecessors Hello People

  ​ Hello People, The Handsome Devils (1974) Bricks (1975)​Looking over the pics of last Wednesday's Insane Clown Posse show got Cutout Bin thinking about bands who wear clown-ish makeup. Of course there was KISS, and the whole death metal thing, but how many readers remember The Hello People? Hmmm... no one. The Hello People were the invention of producer Lou Futterman (who later went on to produce a different kind of clown, Ted Nugent). Lou had seen some French mime movies and thought, "Hey,

  October 12, 2009

• TV Land: 30 Rock Is Back! And Some Other Stuff Happened Too

  It was a long week in TV Land, so let's get some Cheesy Blasters and do it to it: • 30 Rock is back! 30 Rock is back! I know that some of you -- most of you? -- probably thought that Texas' victory was the best thing on TV this week, but that's because you're young and don't know much yet. Trust me: Skillful works of art will outlast the games, no matter their glories. Because seriously, 30 Rock is the new Arrested Development, and its fourth-season opener was jammed with quick jokes, great

  October 19, 2009

• The Week In TV: The World Series Ruins Everything

  Parks and Recreation, yet another reason to love NBC​The weather is cool, Halloween is in the air, and I just redesigned the Pontiac Aztec. This is the week in TV Land: • For being a weak network overall and the home to some truly awful medical dramas, NBC can bring the funny. This week it handed down full-season pickups for Parks and Recreation and Community, both solid shows that have been holding fairly steady in the ratings while also being, you know, entertaining. This week's Comm

  October 26, 2009