Subject:

Joel Osteen

  • Blogs

    May 21, 2012

    Dominique Sachse's Wedding: Filed Under "Things We Need to Not Hear About So Much"

    DID YOU HEAR?!?!?!? KPRC anchorwoman Dominique Sachse got married!!!!!! OMG!!!!! In case you missed the Channel 2 ads, Sachse was one of -- if not the -- hardest-working single moms out there. That's a remark which, if we were churlish, we would find incredibly insulting to all the single moms in ... More >>

  • Blogs

    March 29, 2012

    PETA Asks Joel Osteen to Hang a "Go Vegan" Banner in His Church

    We guess there's no harm in trying. PETA has written a letter asking Joel Osteen to hang a large "Go Vegan" banner in Lakewood Church, for which in return they will "prepare a delicious Easter Sunday faux-ham meal with all the trimmings for his parishioners." Why Osteen? PETA seems to think he's h ... More >>

  • Blogs

    February 2, 2012

    Someone at the FBI Is Swooning Over the "Tall, Dark & Handsome Bandit"

    Feast your eyes on the enticing hunk of man-meat to the right, ladies and gay dudes. Why, he's dreamier than a shirtless Joel Osteen!! At least he is to someone at the FBI, who has not only dubbed the dude the "Tall, Dark & Handsome Bandit" but has included this factoid in the description accompan ... More >>

  • News

    November 17, 2011

    Texas Tweakers

    James "Bull" Durham burned down his mother's house while cooking meth. In Angelina County, the jail is full of guys like him..

  • Blogs

    September 7, 2011

    College Realignment Talk Is The New NFL Lockout Talk

    More a-holery from Ken Starr​During this past summer of sports talk radio, our insatiable appetite for any topic football-related, our perennial need to talk about minutiae at all times, and the usual summer content-related radio doldrums met at a tedious midpoint -- a no man's land that left ... More >>

  • Blogs

    May 5, 2011

    Alvaro Guzman: Lakewood Church Volunteer Fondled Autistic Kid, Cops Say

    This never happened at Compaq Center!! (That we know of)​A volunteer at Lakewood Church, Joel Osteen's mega-temple to Christianity Lite, is being sought by police on charges he fondled an eight-year-old autistic boy. Alvaro Daniel Guzman, 25, allegedly committed the acts in February 2010, KHO ... More >>

  • Blogs

    January 13, 2011

    The Girls Gone Wild Bus: Where It Should Go In Houston

    Photo by Marc BrubakerWe have better suggestions for Houston spots for this bus to visit​When the Girls Gone Wild tour bus is spotted around town, as our own Katharine Shilcutt nodded to on Twitter, people are wont to talk. Speculation begins to pop up, and the town starts abuzz - where is it, ... More >>

  • Blogs

    December 30, 2010

    Slim Thug: Now Tweeting Church!

    Aren't we all, Slim?​Welcome to another fabulous edition of Magnolia City Mixtape. Rocks Off doesn't want you to miss even a smidgen of news from Houston's music scene, so we mine the Internet, sifting through Twitter feeds and Facebook profiles and harvesting every piece we can find. So witho ... More >>

  • Blogs

    October 4, 2010

    Saturday Night: Michael Franti & Spearhead At House Of Blues

    Photos by Jason Wolter​Michael Franti & Spearhead House of Blues October 2, 2010 Check out photos from the show. Hands are in the air immediately with the stupidly fun show opener "Love Don't Wait," as Michael Franti and his Spearhead instrumentalists file out onstage. Franti is a big dude, ... More >>

  • Blogs

    September 14, 2010

    Pop Rocks: A World Without Oprah

    So long, suckers.​The 25th and final season of The Oprah Winfrey Show kicked off yesterday with a John Travolta dance number, an appearance by Paul Simon (of "and Garfunkel" fame, not the deceased U.S. Senator), and an announcement that Oprah would take the 300 studio audience members in atten ... More >>

  • Blogs

    September 9, 2010

    Pop Rocks: What Books Would Jesus Burn?

    ​Talk about your (mostly) lone nuts. Terry Jones, reverend of something called the Dove World Outreach Center (sounds like a rehab facility that uses soap enema therapy), is going ahead with his planned "International Burn-A-Koran Day" on September 11. This in spite of mounting criticism from ... More >>

  • Blogs

    July 9, 2010

    LeBron James: Five Reasons Why He Did Not Choose Houston

    Why LeBron said no​Despite what we thought were pretty compelling arguments yesterday, LeBron James did not announce last night that he will become a Houston Rocket.We blame the Children's Museum. And the Astros.Still, we're not bitter; we're analytical. And we have determined the five reason why ... More >>

  • Blogs

    July 2, 2010

    Top 10 Pop-Star Bobbleheads We'd Like To See

    ​The good people over at Aggronautix have done it again. The toy company has been releasing bobbleheads of punk-rock luminaries such as GG Allin and the Descendents' Milo Aukerman for the past year. Rocks Off has been lucky enough to snag a few. Sitting a few feet from us right now are the t ... More >>

  • News

    May 20, 2010

    The Twitterverse

    More than just cyberspace, the tweet life inspires people to make friends and adopt causes in person. It has a few problems, too.

  • Blogs

    March 23, 2010

    Lakewood Church May Open a Charter School

    ​Joel Osteen's Lakewood Church is developing a proposal to start a charter school for autistic children that would open in the fall of 2011.Nancy Manley, executive principal in the Houston ISD's charter and alternative schools office, mentioned Lakewood's plans during her address to the Senate Edu ... More >>

  • Blogs

    January 6, 2010

    No Fireworks At Parker's First Council Meeting (But Somehow Jolanda Jones Passes Up A Chance To Speak)

    ​Mayor Annise Parker concluded her first City Council meeting this morning with a bang, warning citizens about icy roads in days ahead as Houston braces for what's expected to be its coldest temperatures in decades. "We're covering our pipes, doing what we can to keep ice away from our entrances," ... More >>

  • Blogs

    December 14, 2009

    Aftermath: Nitzer Ebb at Meridian, Joel Osteen With a Trouserful of Funky Cold Medina

    Photos by Groovehouse / Click here for a slideshow​Aftermath was running late on Saturday night after trying to get a teething baby to sleep. We drove our little Toyota as fast as we dared through a fog that on television would have contained dead pirates, eldritch horrors or Michael Jackson ... More >>

  • Blogs

    April 17, 2009

    Aftermath: Nickelback at Toyota Center

    Photos by Craig HlavatyAftermath is of the mind that the best way to tackle something that is reviled or feared is to confront it head on. Like global terrorism, street gangs, or gingivitis, you must take it on at its source, even if doing so makes you feel insecure, vulnerable or wholly fooli ... More >>

  • Blogs

    October 8, 2008

    Aftermath: Fred Eaglesmith at McGonigel's Mucky Duck

    Photos by Craig HlavatyAftermath is of the mind that the best way to tackle something that is reviled or feared is to confront it head on. Like global terrorism, street gangs, or gingivitis, you must take it on at its source, even if doing so makes you feel insecure, vulnerable or wholly fooli ... More >>

  • Music

    September 18, 2008

    Drive-By Truckers, A to Z

    Alabama Ass Whuppin'

  • Blogs

    August 14, 2008
  • Blogs

    August 12, 2008
  • Blogs

    August 12, 2008
  • Blogs

    July 29, 2008
  • News

    May 1, 2008
  • News

    January 10, 2008
  • News

    September 20, 2007

    Carlton Pearson

    Houston's Unity Church hosts the former megachurch preacher who wrote, "God Is Not a Christian"

  • Culture

    February 22, 2007

    Good Budd

    At Lawndale, it's popcorn, boogie boards and neuro-linguistic programming

  • News

    November 30, 2006

    This Man Thinks He's Jesus H. Christ!

    And a lot of people agree with him

  • Blogs

    November 13, 2006

    Scenes from Dynamo Sunday: The Takeoff

    And a lot of people agree with him

  • Blogs

    November 13, 2006

    Scenes from Dynamo Sunday: The Takeoff

    And a lot of people agree with him

  • Culture

    August 24, 2006

    Imperfect Ten

    This Scriptwriters/Houston showcase comes up short

  • News

    April 20, 2006

    En la Calle

    Houston joins the revolución

  • News

    August 21, 2003

    Godspell

    Three hundred people from Austin quit their jobs, sold their homes and moved 175 miles to Alvin to start a new church — called by the Holy Spirit in the form of the Reverend Dana Carson

  • News

    May 22, 2003

    Letters

    Three hundred people from Austin quit their jobs, sold their homes and moved 175 miles to Alvin to start a new church — called by the Holy Spirit in the form of the Reverend Dana Carson

  • News

    December 26, 2002

    All I Want for Christmas Is...

    A shopping list for your favorite political types

  • News

    April 25, 2002

    Tut TUTS

    Plus: Amazing Grace, Moonbeamed, Time Warp

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