Subject:

John Seaborn Gray

  • Blogs

    July 19, 2013

    The Five Worst Trends In Pop Music Right Now

    If you listen to popular music with even a halfway critical ear, which the men and women of Rocks Off at least try to do (though yes, we know some readers may disagree), this is a very tough time. Both the old-fashioned radio airwaves and newfangled streaming gadgetry are awash in songs that are man ... More >>

  • Blogs

    July 12, 2013

    The 10 Lamest Bands of the '90s

    Talk to some people (we guess) and they'll tell you that '90s nostalgia is the only kind of nostalgia that matters. Sunday, the decade of Reality Bites, Doc Martens and frosted tips -- which, seriously, is the name of a San Francisco-based '90s cover band -- will definitely be back in full effect wh ... More >>

  • Blogs

    December 14, 2012

    Rocks Off's 10(ish) Favorite Local Albums of 2012

    Continuing with our year-end panorama, Rocks Off asked our contributors a simple question with a not-so-simple answer: What was your favorite local album of 2012? ALEXA CRENSHAW: Whatever I say here, I'm going to want to take back shortly because there's so much good stuff out there, y'all. Althoug ... More >>

  • Blogs

    December 10, 2012

    Rocks Off's 10 Best Musical Discoveries of 2012

    The thrill of discovering freshly minted treasure or a previously unheralded favorite is one of the main reasons music writers get into this racket in the first place; every so often it can make wading through the ocean of crap mediocrity that is pop music worthwhile. Rocks Off asked our contributor ... More >>

  • Blogs

    June 3, 2012

    Best Of Free Press Summer Fest Day 1: Quintron, Big Freedia, Morris Day, Etc.

    See Rocks Off's complete Free Press Summer Fest coverage. Be sure to also check out our slideshows: the sexy, sweaty Summer Fest crowds and the bands of Summer Fest 2012. Cory Garcia: Stage 7 isn't the most glamorous. Most of your set will be spent playing to the handful of people who came out to y ... More >>

  • Blogs

    February 21, 2012

    Which Metal Bands Should Reunite?: Revocation Tells Us

    Tony Norkus/ www.facebook.com/Revocationn​The music industry has lit up with some pretty high-profile reunions in the past few months. At The Drive-In and Refused both announced comeback shows within days of one another, and even Black Sabbath decided to reconvene for a new album and a world t ... More >>

  • Blogs

    December 5, 2011

    Rap Round Table: What Is The Best Song You Have That Was Inspired By Another Human?

    Some rappers happen to be thoughtful, intelligent people. Each week Rocks Off will have some of them here discussing issues relevant to their culture. Photo illustration by John Seaborn Gray​This Week's Panel: Bun B, Young Sensation, Fat Tony, Hollywood Floss, O.N.E., hasHBrown, Kyle Hubbard ... More >>

  • Blogs

    November 21, 2011

    Three Days of Thanks: Rap Round Table

    Some rappers happen to be thoughtful, intelligent people. Each week Rocks Off will have some of them here discussing issues relevant to their culture. Photo illustration by John Seaborn Gray​This Week's Panel: Not Invited: This Week's Prompt: There are a bunch of things we're responsible ... More >>

  • Blogs

    November 21, 2011

    Comment of the Day: Sexist or Silly?

    Here on Eating Our Words, the commenters absolutely make the blog, and our Comment of the Day honors the best of the bunch. Every day, we read you guys and pick the commenter, or commenters, who made us laugh, cry, salivate over something delicious, or think about things in a new way. In return, w ... More >>

  • Blogs

    November 16, 2011

    Your 2011 Houston Press Music Awards Winners

    Photo By Marco TorresAll night, attendees to the awards show signed a special banner for Chris Gray.​Check out our slideshow of this year's Houston Press Music Awards winners. It was a dandy of an evening last night at Warehouse Live as we handed out those silver records to some of Houston's ... More >>

  • Blogs

    November 14, 2011

    Rap Round Table: What Music-Related Thing Are You Most Thankful For?

    Some rappers happen to be thoughtful, intelligent people. Each week Rocks Off will have some of them here discussing issues relevant to their culture. Photo illustration by John Seaborn Gray​This Week's Panel: Rob Gullatte, Herney the Great, Pyrexx, Mac, Snoopy, Medicine Girl, Chane, Young Se ... More >>

  • Blogs

    July 5, 2011

    What Is The Best Boxing-Match Entrance Music?

    Some rappers happen to be thoughtful, intelligent people. Every Monday that isn't a national holiday, Rocks Off will have some of them here discussing issues relevant to their culture. Photo illustration by John Seaborn Gray​This Week's Panel: Bun B, Paul Wall, One Hunnidt, Mac, O.N.E., Brad ... More >>

  • Blogs

    June 28, 2011

    What Was The Biggest Surprise At Sunday's BET Awards?

    Some rappers happen to be thoughtful, intelligent people. Every Monday (or thereabouts), Rocks Off will have some of them here discussing issues relevant to their culture. Photos illustration by John Seaborn Gray​This Week's Panel: Bun B, Slim Thug, Killa Cal Wayne, Kiotti, Mac, Yung Chill, C ... More >>

  • Blogs

    June 3, 2011

    Summer Fest Critic's Guide: Who We're Seeing At Tinsley

    Jermaine Rogers​In three very short years, Free Press Summer Fest has gone from an experiment most people thought would fail to destination music festival most people wouldn't dare miss even if it is going to be 105 degrees outside. Rocks Off has seen quite a bit of online chatter from people ... More >>

  • Blogs

    March 21, 2011

    Rappers: Is It Better To Be Rich Or Respected?

    Some rappers happen to be thoughtful, intelligent people. Every Monday (that isn't a national holiday) Rocks Off will have some of them hear discussing issues relevant to their culture. Photo illustration by John Seaborn Gray​This Week's Panel: Eskabe, Kyle Hubbard, KDogg, Dice, O.N.E., UZOY, ... More >>

  • Blogs

    March 7, 2011

    Will Mainstream Rap Ever Stop Objectifying Women?

    Some rappers happen to be thoughtful, intelligent people. Every Monday that isn't a national holiday, Rocks Off will have some of them here discussing issues relevant to their culture. Photo illustration by John Seaborn Gray​This Week's Panel: Bun B, Lil Flip, D-Risha, Renzo, Kyle Hubbard, Do ... More >>

  • Blogs

    February 21, 2011

    If Executed, What Are Your Last Words And Last Meal?

    Some rappers happen to be thoughtful, intelligent people. Every Monday, Rocks Off will have some of them here discussing issues relevant to their culture. Photo illustration by John Seaborn Gray​This Week's Panel: Bun B, Yung Redd, D-Risha, hasHBrown, Kyle Hubbard, Z-Ro, Kiotti Not Invited: ... More >>

  • Blogs

    January 11, 2011

    The Rock & Roll Fantasy Camp From Hell

    Rocks Off recently got invited to cover something known as Rock & Roll Fantasy Camp, which works a lot like baseball fantasy camp, except none of the participants can field a line-drive grounder. Among the idols rock campers will meet include 3 Doors Down, Mark Farner, the drummer from the Hooters a ... More >>

  • Blogs

    January 6, 2011

    Jarred Corn Smut: It's What's for Dinner

    ​I'm sure a lot of you, upon hearing the term "jarred corn smut," might assume that this post would be better off as an addendum to John Seaborn Gray's elegant treatise on whole chicken in a can and other packaged delights. I suppose that's why most choose to call the silvery-black fungus that ... More >>

  • Blogs

    January 6, 2011

    Comment of the Day: That Chicken

    ​Here at Eating Our Words, we know that when something disturbs the hell out of you, it's best to talk about it. We can thank John Seaborn Gray for the most recent image we'd like scrubbed from our brains - a terrifying, whole chicken covered in gelatinous goo slipping from a can. We'd like to ... More >>

  • Blogs

    December 31, 2010

    The Worst Music Trends Of 2010

    ​Editor's Pick: Shit. I spent my whole year either avoiding or ignoring trends. No reason to change now. Marc Brubaker: Many a person instructed me to place Ke(Dollar Sign)ha in this spot, but she's become so ubiquitous that I can't help but laugh when I hear her now. No, fine sirs, this awa ... More >>

  • Blogs

    December 31, 2010

    Rocks Off's 2011 New Year's Resolutions

    ​Editor's Pick: To "support the scene" more in 2011. Just kidding. Marc Brubaker: Houston, I have a confession to make. As far as music writers go, this one is pretty bad, too: I have a terrible habit of sleeping on bands just because they are popular. Often, when a new band picks up a lot o ... More >>

  • Blogs

    December 30, 2010

    Things We Never, Ever Want To Hear Again

    ​Editor's Pick: Vampire Weekend's "Holiday." Everything I hate about indie rock (cloying, fey, highly irritating) and car commercials (they're car commercials) in about 15 seconds.. Repeated seven or eight times a fucking hour. Marc Brubaker: "Check us out on Twitter!" or anything else Twitt ... More >>

  • Blogs

    December 29, 2010

    Music's Top Five Hottest Trends For 2011

    Photo illustrations by John Seaborn Gray​Every year-end Rocks Off prognosticates the likeliest trends in music for the upcoming year. So far, we've got a 100 percent success rate, although since the FBI made us take down all of our previous predictions, we have no way to prove it. So you'll j ... More >>

  • Blogs

    December 23, 2010

    The Top WTF Moments Of The Year

    Editor's Pick: WTF doesn't have to mean "bad," you know. About a week ago - a week exactly, as a matter of fact - En Vogue's "Free Your Mind" came on the PA at Fitzgerald's. I have been in a musical fog for a few months, where nothing was really connecting, but this song snapped me right out of it ... More >>

  • Blogs

    December 14, 2010

    Can Rap Be Blamed For Teen Prostitution?

    Some rappers happen to be thoughtful, intelligent people. Every Monday (or thereabouts) that isn't a national holiday, Rocks Off will have some of them here discussing issues relevant to their culture. Photo Illustration by John Seaborn Gray​This Week's Panel: Roderick Thornton, Preemo, Kyle ... More >>

  • Blogs

    November 10, 2010

    What Are Our Lazy Relatives Bringing to Thanksgiving?

    There's one in every family. Everyone is supposed to bring a dish (preferably home-cooked) to the Thanksgiving dinner table, but there's one family member who can never quite get it right. Whether a victim of procrastination, incompetent cooking, or just plain not giving a rat's ass, at least one of ... More >>

  • Blogs

    November 5, 2010

    Nine More Washed-Up Musicians On Reality Shows

    Photo illustrations by John Seaborn Gray​Everybody's favorite lovelorn rock has-been Vince Neil has signed on to Skating With the Stars, an upcoming reality show sure to feature an exact recreation of the photo illustration above. Times, it seems, are tough all over, and Neil can't be the only ... More >>

  • Blogs

    October 1, 2010

    FAIL: ABBA, Animal Collective, Diddy, Pete Doherty

    Photo illustrations by John Seaborn Gray​Hooray! Now Your Feet Are Boring, Too!: A clothing designer called Keep took a whole bunch of ecstasy (probably) and then invited Animal Collective's Avery Tare to design some shoes for them. By "design," we of course mean "scribble on some plain beige ... More >>

  • Blogs

    September 23, 2010

    Top 5 Dumbest Holistic Remedy Foods

    Photo illustrations by John Seaborn GrayYup, that's pretty much it.​Some people prefer to base their belief systems on things like evidence, logic, reason and personal experience. That's all fine and dandy if you want to go through life believing only in things that can be substantiated by rep ... More >>

  • Blogs

    September 20, 2010

    Why Do Rappers Always Go Onstage So Late?

    Some rappers happen to be thoughtful, intelligent people. Every Monday (that isn't a national holiday) Rocks Off will have some of them hear discussing issues relevant to their culture. Photo illustration by John Seaborn Gray​This Week's Panel: Paul Wall, Fat Tony, K-Rino and Kyle Hubbard No ... More >>

  • Blogs

    August 25, 2010

    8 Common Foods (That Are Poisonous)

    Photo illustrations by John Seaborn Gray​Earlier this week, Katharine Shilcutt took a look at 8 foods notable for containing trace amounts of radiation. She carefully pointed out that the radiation in those foods was so negligible, there's no real threat to you or me unless we were to ingest m ... More >>

  • Blogs

    August 23, 2010

    A Simple Question This Week: Where The Ladies At?

    Some rappers happen to be thoughtful, intelligent people. Every Monday Rocks Off will have some of them hear discussing issues relevant to their culture. Photo illustration by John Seaborn Gray​This Week's Panel: Nosaprise, Yung Redd, Kyle Hubbard Not Invited: Girls, apparently. Actually, w ... More >>

  • Blogs

    August 20, 2010

    Post KTRU/KUHF, Possible Houston Mergers & Acquisitions To Come

    Photo illustrations by John Seaborn GrayGozer has designs on the Galleria.​Rice University and the University of Houston have reached a deal to convert KTRU into a 24-hour white-noise station to help our city's insomniacs. Fitzgerald's was just bought out by the guys who made Mango's a viable ... More >>

  • Blogs

    August 2, 2010

    How Stressful Is Being A Rapper... Really?

    Some rappers happen to be thoughtful, intelligent people. Every Monday (that isn't a national holiday) Rocks Off will have some of them discuss issues relevant to their culture. Photo illustration by John Seaborn Gray​This Week's Panel: V-Zilla, Nosaprise, Preemo, Yung Redd, hasHBrown Not In ... More >>

  • Blogs

    July 16, 2010

    FAIL: Prince, Johnny Rotten, Too Short, Auto-Tune

    Photos by John Seaborn Gray​Internet Not As "Over" As Prince Had Hoped: Remember last week when Prince said the Internet was "over," and that was why he's now giving copies of his new CD away for free whenever you buy a copy of that thriving and relevant medium, a British newspaper? Well, ent ... More >>

  • Blogs

    June 21, 2010

    How Important Is It That Rappers Be "Real"?

    Some rappers happen to be thoughtful, intelligent people. Every Monday (that isn't a national holiday) Rocks Off will have some of them hear discussing issues relevant to their culture. This Week's Panel: Paul Wall, Fat Tony, Sam Sneed and Yung Redd Not Invited: Plies and Rick Ross Photo illustra ... More >>

  • Blogs

    May 21, 2010

    FAIL: Jeff Beck, Jonas Brothers, Lilith Fair, ACL Fest

    If you're reading this, you're either on the Internet, or else you've mastered multi-dimensional thought-projection processes that would make Michio Kaku cry like a little girl. We'll assume the former, and just in case you don't already know, the Internet has decided that the word "failure" is too ... More >>

  • Blogs

    April 22, 2010

    Nature's Revenge: Tunes For A Vengeful Planet

    Photo illustration by John Seaborn Gray​ We like to think of the planet we live on as "Mother" Earth, a caring, nurturing parent figure who we thoughtlessly abuse. Well, we at Rocks Off don't know if you've noticed, but Mom ain't exactly helpless. In fact, sometimes she seems less like a benevolen ... More >>

  • Blogs

    April 16, 2010

    Fails Of The Week: BBC 6 Listeners, Whitney Houston, Rolling Stone And MGMT

    If you're reading this, you're either on the Internet, or else you've mastered multi-dimensional thought-projection processes that would make Michio Kaku cry like a little girl. We'll assume the former, and just in case you don't already know, the Internet has decided that the word "failure" is too ... More >>

  • Blogs

    April 9, 2010

    Fails Of The Week: Insane Clown Posse Hates Science, No Dylan In China, Rihanna & Ke$ha's Auto-Tour

    If you're reading this, you're either on the Internet, or else you've mastered multi-dimensional thought-projection processes that would make Michio Kaku cry like a little girl. We'll assume the former, and just in case you don't already know, the Internet has decided that the word "failure" is too ... More >>

  • Blogs

    January 8, 2010

    New iPhone? Rocks Off Has an App for That.

    Photo illustrations by John Seaborn Gray​ We know a ton of you got iPhones over the holiday break. Well, good news: Rocks Off has spent the last few months developing our own iPhone applications (or "apps," as the urban kids are saying) and we're thrilled to debut them here. All inquiries, critici ... More >>

  • News

    December 31, 2009

    Critiquing the Critics

    Readers disagree with our statement that the AP's rock critics are assholes.

  • News

    October 29, 2009

    Dives and DIY Shepherd's Pie

    Our readers weigh in.

  • Blogs

    October 29, 2009

    Twelve Musical Fuck Yous Better Than Gov. Ah-nuld's Coded Message

    ​Photo illustration by John Seaborn Gray​We admit, we never thought he had it in him, but apparently the Governator is capable of human cleverness - just like all non-cybernetic organisms. That is, if we accept that the acrostic in this veto message here isn't just a coincidence (read the first ... More >>

  • Blogs

    August 26, 2009

    The End Finally Comes For Wilshire Village

    Photos by John Seaborn GrayThe view from Dunlavy​We've been following the slow end of the Wilshire Village apartment complex on Alabama, a once-charming relic that should never have seen the wrecking ball. But the wrecking ball has come, as these photos show.Once the process of demolition began, ... More >>

  • Blogs

    July 28, 2009

    Your One-Stop HPMA Showcase Link

    GroovehouseLos Skarnales just wouldn't quit at House of Blues Sunday.​ Rocks Off is just about recovered from Sunday's HPMA showcase mayhem, or as recovered as we're going to get. Despite some bitching on Hands Up Houston - what else is new? - everybody we've talked to had as much of a blast as we ... More >>

  • Blogs

    June 22, 2009

    Slide Show: Albums Almost as Old as We Are

    The other day, the Rocks Off brain trust was sitting around talking, and one of us happened to mention whatever album it was we were talking about - it might have been Duran Duran's Rio - came out the year one of us was born. That got us thinking, "How much have albums released within 12 months aft ... More >>

  • Blogs

    April 1, 2009

    Happy April Fool's Day: Fools in Popular Music

    Photo illustration by John Seaborn Gray In the Tarot, "The Fool is the spirit in search of experience. He represents the mystical cleverness bereft of reason within us, the childlike ability to tune into the inner workings of the world." Hat sold separately.As you've hopefully been able to t ... More >>

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