Kris Brown

Texans Draft Notebook: What The Mercilus Pick Means For The Weekend

The Texans, as expected, addressed a need with their first-round pick Thursday night. It just wasn't the sexy playmaker position that many expected. Whitney Mercilus, a projected linebacker at the NFL level who led the NCAA with 16 sacks in his junior year at Illinois, proved too much value for the ... More >>

Uh Oh! Shuffle Your NFL Draft Big Boards...The Texans Need a Kicker!

"No. I think we're going to look to put the best kicker on our football team. If that's a young guy, if it's Neil [Rackers], if it's another veteran that's out there, then that's what we'll do. We're very interested in bringing Neil back and talking to his representatives about bringing him back." ... More >>

4 Thoughts On The Houston Texan Fan With Crazy Tattoo Courage

Photos by Anna Megan RaleyGreater love hath no man​Anytime I post about tattoos, I always feel the need to preface the post by saying that I don't dislike tattoos, and most certainly don't judge nor dislike people with tattoos. I really just don't understand them. I mean, when you get a tatto ... More >>

Vikings 28, Texans 0: Five Things We Learned

Photos by Marco TorresMatt Leinart's back-up job is safe​The short answer is that we didn't learn much. When the only quasi-starter to play is likely Number 3 corner Brice McCain and the offensive line features a free-agent guard signed two days ago, you know there isn't a lot of value. But T ... More >>

The Year In Battlefight: 25 Thoughts On This Year's Houston Texans

At least the Texans cheerleaders are worth watching​For some reason, there were many people out there who thought the Houston Texans were going to be a good team this year. Playoff good.I didn't read anything about Gary Kubiak getting a brain implant during the off-season, so I could never u ... More >>

Houston Texans 2010 -- ....And Boom Goes The Dynamite

Texans fans are like Pavlov's dog​"I told them that we're playing for our pride these next three weeks, and there's a hell of a lot of pride in that room. We will play well. We will work hard and we will play well." -- Gary Kubiak after Monday night's 34-28 loss to the Baltimore Ravens And ... More >>

Jaguars 31, Texans 24: Were You Even Surprised?

Hail Mary, full of grace....​Until eight days ago, it still felt different. Sure, the Texans were 4-3 and coming off a rough loss to the Colts. But until then, when the Texans had been beaten, they were clearly the lesser team -- losing by at least 13 points to physically superior opponents o ... More >>

Houston Texans -- R.I.P. 2010

Dr. Kubler-Ross is here to see you, Texan fans​In her 1969 book Death and Dying, Elisabeth Kubler-Ross describes in detail the five stages of dealing with grief and tragedy. Simply put, the human progression is to exhibit feelings of denial, anger, bargaining, depression, and acceptance (like ... More >>

Texans 30, Redskins 27: This Was The Game Great Teams Win, And The Old Texans Lose

Arian Foster's a perfect 6-0​On the surface, it could seem silly to characterize a 3-point overtime escape in Washington as more of a season-defining moment than a blowout of rival Indianapolis. But when you consider where the now 2-0 Texans have been, that appears to be exactly the case.Ask New O ... More >>

Houston Texans Turn The Corner -- 5 Winners, 5 Losers

Neil Rackers -- He's no Kris Brown​I shouldn't enjoy carnage as much as I do, but I have to admit that a few hours after Neil Rackers' 35-yard field goal sailed through the uprights, sending the Houston Texans to an improbable 30-27 overtime win over the Washington Redskins yesterday afternoon, My ... More >>

Texans 2010 Preview: Not So Fast With The High Hopes

Photo by Aaron M. SprecherRemember, optimists, Gary Kubiak is still coaching​It's not bad enough that the Texans are starting this season with what is projected to be the toughest schedule in the NFL. Or that the Texans are starting out with Brian Cushing on the suspended list for the first four g ... More >>

Game Time: Houston Texans -- 5 Winners, 5 Losers

Dan Orlovsky faces the press​The Reliant Stadium sprawl of empty seats, the equally sparsely populated press box, the rare ease with which one could navigate pregame traffic -- all those things would seemingly indicate that the Texans final preseason game in 2010 against the Tampa Buccaneers was m ... More >>

Game Time: Houston Texans -- Business Is Good (plus my stab at a 53-man roster)

Playoffs? Are you kidding me? Playoffs!?​At their core, the Houston Texans are a business, just like any other business, and they have customers -- you, the season ticket holders. The Texans have been above .500 for a total of eleven weeks in their history. I mean, let's face it, for the better p ... More >>

Pop Rocks: Fantasy Football For (Immature) Dummies

​Football season is almost upon us. For many people, this time of year offers renewed hope for the future, ranging from the merely possible (can the Saints repeat?) to the improbable (will the Texans makes the playoffs) to the "You gotta be fucking kidding me" (Kris Brown kicks a last-minute f ... More >>

GAME TIME: Texans-Cowboys -- 5 Winners, 5 Losers

Photo by Marco TorresYour face-painting will be in vain!​It's the preseason and we must remember that the Dallas Cowboys are making a return trip to Reliant Stadium in about a month, so let's not get crazy over what the Texans' 23-7 manhandling of the Cowboys on Saturday night means in the big pic ... More >>

Texans' First Pre-Season Game: Some Things Never Change

Still baffled by the red zone​Preseason football games, I think we can all agree, are essentially worthless games for the fans. The final score means nothing. And a winning record in preseason doesn't translate to a winning record in the regular season. The games are important to the coaches an ... More >>

Game Time: Mike Leach, Texans and Grounded Clubs -- Weekend Thoughts

The Whalers can take it out of you​I'm two hours removed from a 5:00 a.m. flight this morning from Boston to Houston, so if this post is even remotely coherent we all have Rich Connelly and his ninja proofreading skills to thank. Because when you go up to Hartford for Whaler Fest 2010, there's no ... More >>

Texans' Scratch-Off Lotto Ticket: How Bad Can It Be?

You don't want to know what's under there​The Texas Lottery announced a new Houston Texans scratch-off game today, with lots of second-chance prizes like "Autographed authentice Texans jersey from a Texans star player."Scratch-off games can be cruel. Especially when you're dealing with the Texans. ... More >>

World Cup: 25 Things An Outsider Learned

What? No "Heil Shitler" headline?​With the U.S. soccer team defeat to Ghana on Saturday, I thought I would note some things I noted from the World Cup this year.1. From my readings on the internet and twitter, it appeared that the U.S. soccer team was coached by Gary Kubiak. The team had bad fi ... More >>

Game Time: Houston Texans: Seven Things To Watch In OTA's

Photo by Mark C. AustinYou can't spell OTAs without Houston!! (And an 'A' from somewhere​My first Cushing-free football blog post in a couple weeks -- now I know how Pedro Gomez felt after Barry Bonds retired. "What the hell am I going to talk about???"Thankfully, the Texans start voluntary organ ... More >>

Game Time: Brian Cushing -- My Final Words On This Topic

Brian, you are getting bad advice​As I type this, the Texans' first session of OTA's is about to wrap up, and we're all anxiously awaiting the final horn ending the session to see if Brian Cushing decides to take out his gas can and empty it on the brush fire that he started with his statement and ... More >>

Ching-less Dynamo Dispatch Chivas 3-0

​No Brian Ching, no problem. No Luis Angel Landin, no problem Without their two star forwards, the Dynamo were able to cruise to a 3-0 victory over Chivas USA this past Saturday at Robertson Stadium. The shutout was the team's first this season. 12 minutes into the game, Dynamo midfielder C ... More >>

Like Everyone Else, Texans Kicker Kris Brown Knew He Had A Problem This Year

​So let me see if I understand this: Kris Brown knew that he had a mechanical problem of some kind with his kicking, but he elected not to do anything about it because, like a golfer who doesn't want to make mechanical adjustments between rounds, a kicker doesn't want to make mechanical adjust ... More >>

What's It Gonna Take To Get Gary Kubiak Fired?

Photo by Mark C. Austin​Before the football season, Houston Texans owner Bob McNair supposedly said that anything short of the playoffs for the team would be unacceptable. I say supposedly because here we are, in January, at the end of another non-playoff season, and not only is Gary Kubiak still ... More >>

The Triple Option: 2-For-2 Against Disinterested Bowl Teams

Photo by John RoyalThe not-so-filled stands at the Texas Bowl.​The Texas Bowl and the Armed Forces Bowl featured two teams in Houston and Missouri who felt they should have been playing in better games going up against two teams who employing the triple-option run offense.The Cougars have had trou ... More >>

Texans 34, Patriots 27: Progress But No Playoffs

Photo by Mark C. Austin​The Texans legitimately won nine games. The New York Jets legitimately won seven. The Texans displayed tremendous heart on Sunday in rallying past a Patriots team playing its starters and remaining aggressive almost throughout, while the Jets were given a handout for ... More >>

Game Time: At That Moment, Jerry....I Tell You, The Texans WERE A Playoff Team!

"So I started to walk into the water. I won't lie to you boys, I was terrified! But I pressed on and as I made my way past the breakers a strange calm came over me. I don't know if it was divine intervention or the kinship of all living things but I tell you Jerry at that moment I was a marine bio ... More >>

Texans 27, Dolphins 20: So Close, Yet So Far

​One game. One of two missed Kris Brown field goals. One of two Chris Brown rushing attempts from a yard out. A ridiculous Chris Brown pass on first and goal in Jacksonville. Take away any of those -- just one -- and the Texans are most likely 9-6 and controlling their own playoff destiny hea ... More >>

Texans 16, Rams 13: Staying Alive

​It's often noted how the difference between the 7-7 Texans and an 11-3 powerhouse is two Kris Brown kicks and two conversions of a single yard. Turns out, the difference between 7-7 and 1-13 isn't all that great, either. As the Texans seem to do in late-season road games where they're hea ... More >>

Game Time: "Oh My God....He's Gonna Throw It.....NOOOOOOO!!!!"

​"That's the thing about defining moments -- when they define you as really, really good or really, really bad, you pretty much know them the minute they occur; when the jury is still out on whether you're good or bad, ultimately you have to go back and find the defining moment."  -- Sean Pen ... More >>

ERNIE'S ON BANKS'S KRAPPY KICKER

Stirred and Shaken: Ernie's on Banks's Krappy Kicker

Photo by Troy Fields​With apologies to those who had legitimately rough childhoods, the Houston Oilers damn near scarred me for life as a kid. I've actually blocked out some of the more traumatic episodes from my memory. Grim hospital visits, dead pets, divorce — all that stuff is clear, ... More >>

Colts 35, Texans 27: At Least You Saw This One Coming

​The most alarming aspect in the latest installment of Texans collapses wasn't the game itself. Rather, what's most frightening is just how customary this has become under the leadership of head coach Gary Kubiak.In this week's edition, the lion's share of blame goes to quarterback Matt Schaub and ... More >>

Game Time: Defining Texans Coach Gary Kubiak

​"When a defining moment comes along, you define the moment... or the moment defines you." -- Roy McAvoyCertainly, I'm not asking Gary Kubiak to make like the source of the above quote and take multiple 3-wood shots over a water hazard to post a 12 on the last hole of the U.S. Open, or even do o ... More >>

Titans 20, Texans 17: It's The Trenches, Stupid

​It would be easy to blame Kris Brown.It would be easy to chalk it up to an inspired homecoming performance by Vince Young. It would be easy to criticize several iffy playcalls by offensive coordinator Kyle Shanahan and coach Gary Kubiak, including a decision to effectively kneel down before the f ... More >>

Game Time: Stop Me If You've Heard This Before -- So The Texans Are Going To Tie The Game....

​There are certain teams around the NFL where having the national stage all to themselves -- say, on a Thursday night, Sunday night, or especially on Monday night -- is seen as just another day at the office. To teams like the Colts, Patriots, Giants, and a handful of others, the prime-time stage ... More >>

Game Time: Kick In The Junk...Wide Left

​I woke up Sunday morning thinking that things had to get better. After a week that started off with a right cross from Kobe, a left hook from the Yankees, and a sucker punch in the junk from Notre Dame, I thought surely these events were just karmic balance for what was going to be the biggest w ... More >>

What To Look For If You're Looking At The Texans And Saints

Photo by wackykramer​It's time for preseason game number two for the Houston Texans. This week, they're taking on the New Orleans Saints. The two teams have been practicing against each other this week, and yesterday, things got a bit heated as there were multiple fights punctuated by Saints tight ... More >>

Tuesday Morning Quarterbacking: Hooters and Houston Texans

I'm in a Hooters in downtown Phoenix, Arizona and the Houston Texans are losing to the Oakland Raiders. And I'm the only one in the place watching the game. The requisite Redskins fans are scattered about, watching the Redskins on a majority of the TVs - really, is there any place besides Dall ... More >>

Tuesday Morning Quarterbacking: Hooters and Houston Texans

I'm in a Hooters in downtown Phoenix, Arizona and the Houston Texans are losing to the Oakland Raiders. And I'm the only one in the place watching the game. The requisite Redskins fans are scattered about, watching the Redskins on a majority of the TVs - really, is there any place besides Dall ... More >>

Texans-Raiders: Don't Bet on Black

Lots of you don't like what I write about the Texans. You think I'm too negative. That I don't give the team proper credit. Hell, some of you have actually written that you want me to die. To which I respond, if you want homers who are always positive, go over to the Chron. I try to take a more ... More >>

Texans-Raiders: Don't Bet on Black

Lots of you don't like what I write about the Texans. You think I'm too negative. That I don't give the team proper credit. Hell, some of you have actually written that you want me to die. To which I respond, if you want homers who are always positive, go over to the Chron. I try to take a more ... More >>

Tuesday Morning Quarterbacking: Jeff Fisher Outcoached by Gary Kubiak?

I'm a big guy - no literally, I'm 6'4", so I'm a big guy - so I can admit when I'm wrong. And I was wrong about Sunday's Texans/Titans game. And I was wrong big time. Andre Johnson had a day for the ages with 207 receiving yards and a TD. Steve Slaton rushed for over a hundred yards. The Texan ... More >>

Tuesday Morning Quarterbacking: Jeff Fisher Outcoached by Gary Kubiak?

I'm a big guy - no literally, I'm 6'4", so I'm a big guy - so I can admit when I'm wrong. And I was wrong about Sunday's Texans/Titans game. And I was wrong big time. Andre Johnson had a day for the ages with 207 receiving yards and a TD. Steve Slaton rushed for over a hundred yards. The Texan ... More >>

Texans-Jaguars: The Moral of the Tale

Hope for the Houston Texans?

Gary Kubiak and team search for their first winning season

Texans-Buccaneers: Go Team! Or Something…

Notes & Quotes: Wondering How God Feels about Ugly with the Houston Texans

How About Those Texans?