Subject: Lil Rounds

• Idol Beat: Hollywood Week, Part 1

  [Note: Because a lot of people are apparently into American Idol, Rocks Off asked contributor Ray Cummings to keep track of this season for us. This is his first report.] "Hollywood Week" marks the point in American Idol's grist-mill rigamorole calendar where the kid gloves come off, when being cute 'n' quirky with the hint of a decent set of pipes isn't enough anymore, when it's time to separate the Kimberly Caldwells from the Josiah Lemings, when the cavalcade of Ford product placement be

  February 5, 2009

• Idol Beat, Part 1: More Hollywood Week

  Photos courtesy FoxYou thought the funeral was over? You thought all those tears were dried up? You were wrong, my friends - so very, very wrong. Aye, verily, the bloodletting continued unabated as Hollywood Week wound down. Hey, Ryan Seacrest warned us at the outset: "The stakes are as high as they've ever been, and the pressure is even higher. This... is American Idol!" DAY 4 Seacrest: "It's Day 4 of a long and grinding Hell week." Indeed, but with all due respect to the nervous, s

  February 12, 2009

• Idol Beat, Part 2: Still More Hollywood Week

  Michael Becker/ Fox AI judges Simon Cowell and Kara DioguardiDAY 5 This new Idol concept - a lushly appointed "judges' mansion" where contestants on thin ice are forced to sing for their survival - was squandered, somewhat, by the producers. I mean, this was a two-hour show, and really, there was time to make it a bit wacky, with mock bits wherein Simon, Kara, Paula and Randy pretend to live the high life: pedicures, pampering, sending butlers on petty errands, flipping out on chambermai

  February 12, 2009

• Idol Beat: The Final 36, Group 2

  Michael Becker/ Fox Adam LambertThere were a few seconds during the Rolling Stones' 2006 Super Bowl halftime performance where formaldehyded guitarist Keith Richards let his inner demon peek out. I can't remember for the life of me which song the band was playing, but Richards let loose with a bit of gnarly fret nastiness where he could've played it straight; it was a quick, effective display of virtuosity, a reminder that dude could've run away with the entire mini-set if he'd so chose.

  February 26, 2009

• Idol Beat: The Final 36, Group 3

  Peyton Manning flow - I just go, no huddle: Michael Becker/ Fox Lil Rounds* Hey, Von, Alex, Scott, Taylor, Kendall? You thought you were trying to advance into the Top 12 tonight, didn't you? But you were wrong: in reality, you were just opening for Lil Rounds. * Kara, do everyone a favor and quit'cher harping on the dire importance of "knowing who the contestants are." No one else cares. We want wet-dream fodder, disposable pop music to chew up than spit away like Bubblicious, glitzy

  March 4, 2009

• Idol Beat: The Final 36, Group 3 Results

  Michael Becker/ Fox Group 3 finalists Scott McIntyre, Lil Rounds and Jorge NunezIn honor of Randy "That Was Hot!" Jackson, startlingly homely American Idol Season 6 auditionee Jennifer "The Hotness" Chapton, and rapidly shrinking boomer-rawk mag Rolling Stone - which boasts a "Hot List" annually - today's edition of Idol Beat comes at you from a "Hot" perspective. HOT 'DO Von Smith's ludicrous, gravity-defying, Ed Grimley uplick last night. Was that a minor miracle of cosmologic science

  March 5, 2009

• Idol Beat: The Final 13

  Ray Mickshaw/ Fox Paula liked the way Scott McIntyre handled his instrument.Tonight's theme? "Michael Jackson Night." Thus, a lot of tears (and no lack of cruel laughter) are pretty much guaranteed - and the King of Pop won't even be there! * Ryan Seacrest outsources announcing duties to some nameless stooge. Hey, anonymous announcers need work, too. Toupees don't buy themselves! * This big kahuna stage set is like a night club from Xanadu or Buck Rogers, which probably wasn't the vibe

  March 11, 2009

• Idol Beat: The Top 11

  Photo by Ray Mickshaw / FOXPictured: Matt Giraud, exquisite gumline Traditionally, I've concluded the first Idol Beat of any given week with predictions as to who the American Idol judges or viewing public will send home the next night. This week I'm upending that, and predicting that no one will go home. That's right: all eleven of the remaining finalists are safe as houses. "But how is that even possible," you ask, you cry, you pound the sides of your PC monitor. Well, the judges have that

  March 18, 2009

• Idol Beat: The Top Ten

  Photos by Michael Becker/ Fox Michael Sarver couldn't patch Motown's soul.Man, Sarvernator! What happened? When first we met, you were so dope, flexing serious white-soul chops - minus a soul patch - and you had the sort of blue-collar backstory that seemed to make you a lock for the Top Seven or Top Eight. But it turned out that you had an Achilles heel: the audience. When you sang for the American Idol judges' panel, you were golden; when you had to get up in front of a studio audience

  March 26, 2009

• Idol Beat: The Top Nine

  Fox Scott McIntyre: Don't go changin'...Remember last week's requiem for the Sarvernator? Turns out that Anoop - Season 8's Great Dork Hope - is in the same damn leaky boat: a phenom before the judges, a lamestain when serenading America. His put-on Usher turn last night cemented his unworthy status, and officially killed any affection I ever had for the guy. In all likelihood, Anoop will be in tonight's bottom three with Megan Joy and Lil Rounds, and he will deserve it. Last night was r

  April 1, 2009

• Idol Beat: The Top Eight

  Photos by Michael Becker/ Fox Front runner: Adam Lambert, American Idol's likely last man standing.Long before being voted in as California's current governor, Arnold Schwarzenegger starred in a popular sci-fi action movie called Predator. The specifics of the plot aren't important, but the underlying schematic is a bunch of characters getting picked off, one by one, by some dangerous, mysterious other. (See also Alien, Sunshine, Event Horizon, and a billion other movies.) And so the big

  April 8, 2009

• Idol Beat: The Top Seven

  Michael Becker/ Fox Somehow Still Hanging Around: The bloom is off Lil Rounds' "Rose."Perhaps delusionally, I nursed a desperate hope that this week's American Idol theme would be "songs used in Quentin Tarantino movies." Seriously, I even worked up a sort of dream list of songs I thought the seven remaining contestants would choose from brilliantly soundtracked flicks like Jackie Brown, Reservoir Dogs, and Death Proof. Alas. I was mistaken, of course: this is "Music from Films" week, an

  April 15, 2009

• Idol Beat: The Top Seven Results

  Michael Becker/ Fox Bottom Feeding: Lil Rounds and Matt Giraud will likely be right back here next week.At the beginning of Wednesday's American Idol, I was pretty sure that whoever the week's lowest vote-getter was - Lil Rounds or Matt Giraud - would go home. No save for them. So when Simon Cowell announced that despite the fact that low-man-on-the-totem pole Giraud wasn't improving and had no prayer of winning Season 8 - then went and saved his bacon anyway - I was totally floored; didn

  April 16, 2009

• Idol Beat: The One

  Mea culpa: Yi. I typed this entire post - then accidentally closed the Mozilla Firefox window and lost everything. Let this be a lesson to every blogger out there: compose in Word. For real.Photos by Ray Mickshaw/ FoxAmerican Idol winner Kris Allen practices his "Who, me?" showbiz face. Let's not belabor this: Kris Allen won. It is not, in fact, gay folks' time. I'm not especially surprised, but I am disappointed. What can you do, though? Adam Lambert will drop an amazing album someday. Kris wil

  May 21, 2009