Mario Williams

Mario Williams Can Now Actually Arrest His Haters

The relationship between former Texan Mario Williams and the city of Houston has always been somewhat dicey. It goes all the way back to the day he was drafted in 2006, when most of Houston wanted the Texans to take Vince Young or Reggie Bush instead of the big defensive end out of North Carolina ... More >>

Texans-Bills: 4 Winners, 4 Losers, "Judgment Day" Edition

So that was "Judgment Day" huh? All righty then. What was billed (by Mario Williams) as Mario Williams' authoritative homecoming, basically turned into a fairly ho-hum day of work for the Texans, a 21-9 victory over the Buffalo Bills. Consider the following numbers: - The Texans won by 12 points. ... More >>

Texans 21, Bills 9: What Stood Out From A Sluggish Seventh Win

See pics of the Texans' win on Military Appreciation Day at Reliant Stadium. If the Texans had a trap game on their 2012 schedule, this appeared to be it. One week after a bye. Two weeks removed from an emotional matchup with long-time nemesis Baltimore. Seven days before an NBC primetime showdown ... More >>

Texans-Bills: The 10 Best Rapper(ish) Tweets From Sunday's Game

Houston has a professional football team, called the Houston Texans. A lot of people like them; some are rappers. The Internet has several forms of social media; one is called Twitter. A lot of people use it. Some of them are rappers. Like we've done in the past, we perused Twitter during Sunday's ... More >>

Texans-Bills: NEW BATTLE-DRINK Bingo Drinking Card, "Judgment Day" Version

According to Wikipedia, "Judgment Day" is defined as the following: In Christian theology, it is the final and eternal judgment by God of every nation. The concept is found in all the Canonical gospels, particularly the Gospel of Matthew. It will purportedly take place after the Resurrection of the ... More >>

Mario Williams' Wednesday Therapy Session With Mark Berman Of FOX 26

"I didn't want to enter free agency in the first place, but it was a one-way door given to me by the GM to leave Houston. I want the fans there to know entering free agency was not my decision." -- Mario Williams in a Wednesday interview with Mark Berman of Fox 26 You know the old saying "It's not ... More >>

Mario Williams Has Wrist Surgery, "Judgment Day" Hangs In The Balance

"I don't care about your expectations. I don't care about anybody's expectations." -- Mario Williams via the Buffalo News, when asked if he thinks he is living up to expectations Underachievement, excuses, sporadic to nonexistent productivity. Buffalo, I know this version of the Mario Williams ... More >>

Buffalo Bills Fans Tweet Their Hatred For Mario Williams

Hard to believe now, but there was a time not too long ago when Texan fans openly debated the appropriate amount for the Texans to allocate this past offseason to re-sign defensive end/outside linebacker/chronic underachiever Mario Williams. Sure, the Texans defense was just fine without Mario for t ... More >>

NFL Week 1: Schaub Gets Rich(er), Buffalo Gets Poor(er) -- 4 Winners, 4 Losers

Check out our slideshow of the Houston Texans' season opener against the Dolphins. Could Sunday have been any better? 80-degree day. Sun shining. Birds singing. NFL football back in our lives. Oh and someone left a whole book of Burger King coupons in the lobby of my building. SCORE! So yeah there ... More >>

Vince Young Cut By The Buffalo Bills: 6 Awesome Things About VY's Twitter Account

It's hard to believe now that in April 2006 there was actually a legitimate debate nationally over whom the Texans should take with the first overall pick in the NFL Draft -- Mario Williams, Reggie Bush, or Vince Young. It's less hard to believe that here in Houston, there was practically no debate. ... More >>

Texans Rewind: I Found a 2008 NFL Preview Magazine, Man Alive Was the Texans Defense Bad

On our radio show on 1560 The Game this past Monday, John Granato and I were breaking down various aspects of both the Texans 26-13 win over the Panthers and the preseason in general. The topic was the defense, specifically Whitney Mercilus and the various ways that Texans defensive coordinator Wade ... More >>

Texans Draft Notebook: What The Mercilus Pick Means For The Weekend

The Texans, as expected, addressed a need with their first-round pick Thursday night. It just wasn't the sexy playmaker position that many expected. Whitney Mercilus, a projected linebacker at the NFL level who led the NCAA with 16 sacks in his junior year at Illinois, proved too much value for the ... More >>

Goodbye, Mario Williams: Texan Signs with Buffalo

So the #houstonwhatugot hashtag campaign proved to be a failure. The effort to keep Super Mario Williams a Texan has failed, as the free agent has signed a big deal with the Buffalo Bills. ESPN reports Williams got a six-year deal with $50 million guaranteed, a deal that could potentially be wort ... More >>

A Look Ahead To Texan Free Agency, And Why It Won't Involve Peyton Manning

It was less than a month ago when I believed the Texans would consider making a play for quarterback Peyton Manning. But on the verge of the NFL's free-agent signing bonanza on Tuesday, it looks as though any Texans' changes will be on a smaller scale -- and rightfully so. It seems clear the Texan ... More >>

Value Added: Arian Foster vs. Mario Williams

The Texans are facing an offseason unlike any other they have ever seen in their ten years of existence. For the first time ever, General Manager Rick Smith, Coach Gary Kubiak and owner Bob McNair have to figure out how to keep together a very good lineup of players and, gasp, even make it better. F ... More >>

Texans Must Take Long-Term Approach to Free Agency

A great irony of sports in 2012, particularly sports that are fiscally governed by some sort of salary cap, is that we as sports fans have all become so emotionally invested in the performance of our teams that we've become more astute in "advising" management of our teams on how to spend and alloca ... More >>

Comment of the Day: Mario Must Go Edition

​We have some great commenters here on Hair Balls, and it's time we paid some damn attention to them. So we'll be highlighting a Comment of the Day each morning, from the previous day's work. Maybe two comments, even. This will all be determined by a highly rigorous scientific formula involv ... More >>

Texans Offseason Blueprint: Five Moves Needed to Become AFC Favorites

​If Sunday's AFC championship proved anything, it's that the Texans with T.J. Yates were a legitimate threat to reach the Super Bowl. The same Ravens that the Texans so thoroughly dominated in Baltimore one week earlier (save mostly-unforced turnovers) had the title in Lee Evans's grasp and o ... More >>

2011-12 Houston Press Texans Game Card

Texans/Bengals -- 4 Winning Plays That Never Would Have Happened in 2010

T.J. Yates is on a roll.​Sunday morning, about an hour before the Texans and Bengals kicked off, I was driving to the grocery store with my girlfriend Amy to pick up some "Texans watching" supplies -- chips, sandwich paraphernalia, beverages, etc. (Xanax no longer necessary this season.) Unsol ... More >>

Texans/Browns -- 4 Winners, 4 Losers

Photo by Marco TorresTough day for Colt McCoy​The Texans beat the Browns soundly yesterday by a score of 30-12, and for the first time in the history of the franchise, your hometown team is three games over .500. The Texans have never tasted this rarefied air before, so I don't really know w ... More >>

Mario Williams to Help HPD Hand Out More Speeding Tickets

Photo by Marco TorresSuper Mario, looking for ticket revenue.​Mario Williams isn't helping the Houston Texans out much this year, being injured and all, but he's still helping Houstonians!! He's helping them get traffic tickets, that is. Then again, if you're going so fast the cops need a 20 ... More >>

Texans-Ravens: Five Things to Watch

Photo by Marco TorresThe Texans face a tougher test this week.​"If the Texans are 3-3 after the first six games, then we'll be happy." -- Pretty much every same Texans fan The statement is a classic example of how the ebb and flow of a season can recalibrate expectations. The Texans are set u ... More >>

The Houston Rap Football Team's Defensive Starters

Just about a month ago, we wrote about how some of the plays in the playbook of the under-15 football team we coach were disguised with names of Houston rappers and/or songs. Shortly after it posted, mail that was electronic started showing up suggesting that there be more football-related posts. On ... More >>

Texans 31, Raiders 24: With A Running Game Like This, Johnson Has Time To Rest

Photo by Aaron M. SprecherMario Williams kept up the pressure​It only took one offseason and one Arian Foster to transform the Texans' running game from shaky to the club's foundation.As a result, the Texans on Sunday allowed star wideout Andre Johnson to rest his ailing ankle and saw their offens ... More >>

Game Time: Houston Texans -- Business Is Good (plus my stab at a 53-man roster)

Playoffs? Are you kidding me? Playoffs!?​At their core, the Houston Texans are a business, just like any other business, and they have customers -- you, the season ticket holders. The Texans have been above .500 for a total of eleven weeks in their history. I mean, let's face it, for the better p ... More >>

Texans' First Pre-Season Game: Some Things Never Change

Still baffled by the red zone​Preseason football games, I think we can all agree, are essentially worthless games for the fans. The final score means nothing. And a winning record in preseason doesn't translate to a winning record in the regular season. The games are important to the coaches an ... More >>

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25 Things About The Texans-Titans Monday Night Match-Up

​For the second week in a row, it's homecoming week on Monday Night Football. This past Monday, it was the Baltimore Ravens returning to the place from which they came, Cleveland, to play the Browns. This coming Monday, the Tennessee Titans are returning to Houston to take on the Texans.With tha ... More >>

Texans-Saints: New, "Improved " D Falls Flat In First Home Test

​Run the ball, and stop the run.It's one of the oldest clichés on what determines NFL success. But if there's much truth to it, the Texans' potential breakthrough season might already be in some trouble.With Reggie Bush out with a calf injury, the Saints (2-0) gashed the Texans (1-1) on Satur ... More >>

25 Key Things To Watch For In The Texans' Pre-Season Opener

​With the Houston Texans kicking off pre-season play tomorrow night, I thought I would throw out a list of 25 things to watch or listen for during the game.1. Does Matt Schaub make it through two series of plays without any type of injury?2. What kind of stupid catchphrase is radio voice Marc Vand ... More >>

Slideshow: The Houston Texans at Training Camp

Slideshow: The Houston Texans at Training Camp

Top Five Houstonians As Hurricanes

Chronicle Totally Crushing on Mario Williams

Jason Friedman’s NFL Picks, Week 16: Super Mario Snubbed, But That’s a Good Thing

Jason Friedman’s NFL Picks, Week 15: Peter King is a Goober

NFL Wrap: Losing Teaches Lessons, Except When It Doesn’t

Slideshow: Texans vs. Saints

Mean Joe Greene Meets Avril Lavigne: Texans-Cowboys from the Press Box

Texans Better. Mario, Not So Much.

It's Time for Mario Williams to Shine. Or Else.

Touch and Go

Missing Man Formation

Missing Man Formation

Exercise Your Right to Gloat

Exercise Your Right to Gloat

No, Seriously, They Won

Football and Winning?