Milo Hamilton

Hey Astros, You Might Want To Hire Some Radio Broadcasters

The Houston Astros report for spring training next week. The first spring training game is on Saturday, February 23rd. And yet the Astros still do not have a radio broadcast team. Brett Dolan and Dave Raymond were dismissed the day after the 2012 season ended. In early October. And the topic as to ... More >>

Whoever They Hire, The New Astros Radio Broadcasters Have Their Work Cut Out For Them

The Astros television broadcast booth was finalized last week. Bill Brown will return at the primary play-by-play voice. Alan Ashby will be the primary color analyst. When Brown doesn't work (he's doing a reduced schedule this season), then Ashby will do the play-by-play and he'll be joined in the b ... More >>

Former Astros Broadcaster Brett Dolan Talks About Awkward Formats, Milo Hamilton and the New Astros Front Office

Many Astros fans were shocked at the news that radio voices Brett Dolan and Dave Raymond had been dismissed from the team the day after the season ended. With the retirement of longtime play-by-play voice Milo Hamilton, it was assumed by many that Dolan and Raymond would finally be given their chanc ... More >>

Looking Forward To The Astros In 2013

With 2012 coming to an end, let's kiss this lost year of the Astros goodbye and take a look at what's coming in 2013. The key word is "new," as in new uniforms, new logos, new TV network, new broadcasters, new players, new manager and coaches, and on, and on, and on. 5. Welcome to the American Lea ... More >>

25 Ways to Replace Jim Deshaies; You're Welcome, Astros!

As you know by now, Jim Deshaies has left the Astros, and is joining the Chicago Cubs broadcasting crew. In many ways, that's like making the jump from AAA to the majors since WGN is seen nationally while Comcast Sports Net Houston is seen just about nowhere. Now with Deshaies gone, the Astros are h ... More >>

Teen Wanted To Shoot Up Katy School

Comment of the Day: The Astros' Payroll Massacre

We have some great commenters here on Hair Balls, and it's time we paid some damn attention to them. So we'll be highlighting a Comment of the Day each morning or afternoon from the previous day's work. Maybe two comments, even. This will all be determined by a highly rigorous scientific formula i ... More >>

Wow, Brett Dolan And Dave Raymond Fired By The Astros. Who's Next?

I feel that I owe an apology to Brett Dolan and Dave Raymond. It took me a few years before I accepted them as members of the Astros radio crew. Mostly that was due to my affection for Alan Ashby, who was unfairly forced out of the booth. Once I got in tune with them, I liked them. They knew their ... More >>

We Dared To Go: The Astros Last Home Game Of A Godawful 2012, And the End Of Several Eras

Check out our slideshow of Milo Hamilton saying goodbye and more during the Astros' final 2012 home game. Astros fans probably knew back in April that they would have a hard row to hoe this year, but even still, every April brings out a sense of optimism in fans, and the unspoken concept that maybe ... More >>

What, Larry Dierker Wants To Come Back? Then What Are The Astros Waiting For?

You've probably checked out on the Astros already, at least you have judging by the attendance. But the Astros are busy making preparations for next season in hopes that they'll be able to grab your attention and get you back out to the ballpark. They've fired most of the front office staff, and th ... More >>

10 Suggestions For Improving the Poorly Ranked Astros Radio Broadcasts

Baseball blog and stats-geek delight Fangraphs did a little post over the weekend ranking the radio broadcasts of the 30 major league teams (h/t to Crawfish Boxes). There's nothing really shocking in the rankings, unless you count the Astros radio broadcast team only finishing at number 23 -- they'r ... More >>

The Dome, Abandoned

Touring the old favorite

Comment of the Day: Not Missing Milo Hamilton

We have some great commenters here on Hair Balls, and it's time we paid some damn attention to them. So we'll be highlighting a Comment of the Day each morning, from the previous day's work. Maybe two comments, even. This will all be determined by a highly rigorous scientific formula involving wit ... More >>

Astros Broadcaster Milo Hamilton To Retire, Finally

So long, Milo​Milo Hamilton's announcing his retirement today. It's a day I never thought would come, and the only thing I'm upset about is that he'll still do the games this season. I've never understand his appeal to listeners. Then again, I grew up with Gene Elston as the voice of the As ... More >>

Astros Media Day Kicks Off 2012 Season -- 5 Early Storylines

In sandlot football growing up, we always had a saying after touchdowns that "losers walk," meaning the team that scored stays at that end of he field to kick off and the "losers" on defense have to march to the other end of the field to receive. So it's probably appropriate that, due to the NBA c ... More >>

20 Modest Fan Suggestions for Jim Crane

The word from on-high came earlier this week when the Houston Astros announced that Jim Crane had heard the voice of the fans and thus would not be changing the team's name. It's nice that Crane paid some attention to the people who buy tickets (though it does seem strange to see how many people co ... More >>

11 Modest Suggestions For Jim Crane

​After the Astros lose to the Chicago Cubs this afternoon, the 2011 MLB season will be one-thirds complete. And while it was expected the Astros would be bad, being the worst team in the National League was not expected -- an injury-depleted Minnesota Twins are the only thing keeping the Astr ... More >>

Sex Dolls & Texans

The men who love pseudo-women

Comment of the Day: Thou Shalt Not Criticize St. Biggio

​We have some great commenters here on Hair Balls, and it's time we paid some damn attention to them. So we'll be highlighting a Comment of the Day each morning, from the previous day's work. Maybe two comments, even. This will all be determined by a highly rigorous scientific formula involv ... More >>

Milo Hamilton And The War On Lance Berkman

He's a Cardinal now, get used to it.​So it appears that in the time between being traded to the New York Yankees and signing with the St. Louis Cardinals that Lance Berkman has gone from being one of the good guys to Public Enemy Number One. At least if you can give credence to anything that ... More >>

My Threatening Letter To The Astros

Demands include a Carlos Lee bobblebelly doll​Dear Astros: Last night, you and the Cubs drew the second-smallest crowd in the history of Minute Maid Park. I say that both teams drew that crowd because any time the Cubs come to town, a legitimately vocal portion of the ticket buying audience ... More >>

Milo the Drink: Five Things to Expect, If You Know Milo Hamilton

Now you can drink the essence of Milo​A friend of the blog took this photo of an amazing drink called Milo. It's popular in Australia, Wiki tells us, but here in Houston -- home of Houston Astro play-by-play legend Milo Hamilton -- it seems especially apt. We've never tasted the stuff, but j ... More >>

We Are Your Astros: The 25 Rejected Slogans

For Sale! Cheap!​The Astros' slogan for this year is "We Are Your Astros." Seeing this slogan is enough to make one think that Drayton McLane's wasting way too much money on advertising agencies. My second thought was that the guys at the Astros County blog had a much better slogan, "Infect ... More >>

Five Very, Very Scary Houston Sports Halloween Costumes

Drayton doesn't TP your house, he covers it with advertising​Halloween is getting ever closer, and you're still undecided on your costume?If you live in Houston, there are some choices available sure to strike terror, horror or sickening dismay into anyone who dares open their door to you.Like the ... More >>

Houston's 10 Best Sports Moments*

*And the 5 most heartbreaking...

Top 10 Pop-Star Bobbleheads We'd Like To See

​The good people over at Aggronautix have done it again. The toy company has been releasing bobbleheads of punk-rock luminaries such as GG Allin and the Descendents' Milo Aukerman for the past year. Rocks Off has been lucky enough to snag a few. Sitting a few feet from us right now are the t ... More >>

Game Time: Twitter -- My Houston Sports "Follow Friday"

Follow me....to freedom!!​I'm not going to lie, I was a little bit crushed. I read Craig Hlavaty's fantastic overview of the Twitter universe (or as named in the article, "The Twitterverse"; somewhere Dwight Shrute and his "funtivities" -- short for fun activities -- approve), and in it he manage ... More >>

Drayton McLane: The Myth That He's Not Cheap

Scrooge had his good points, too, but he still was Scrooge​There was an item written over at Chron.com sports last week that I wanted to address -- yeah, I'm a little late, but I just read it. It was written by one of their fan bloggers, and in a decent post about some of the reasons why the ... More >>

Baseball Is Coming: 25 Things To Love About The Astros This Year

Photo by Aaron M. Sprecher​Believe it or not, but pitchers and catchers are reporting for the Houston Astros on February 19, 2010. Yes, the Astros are going to suck this year, but it's baseball, and I love baseball. That said, I realize that some of you might want some more specific reasons to get ... More >>

10 Candidates For The Job Of Astros Manager

Photo by Aaron M. Sprecher​Drayton McLane and his so-called brain trust are supposed to start meeting this week to discuss names for the next manager of the Houston Astros.Brian McTaggart over at Astros.com throws out some of the usual names we would expect to hear -- Jim Fregosi (friend of Ed Wa ... More >>

Milo Hamilton, Not Quite R.-ing I. P.

​Those of you who are still bothering with following the Astros, and who are still bothering to follow the Houston Chronicle's Jose de Jesus Ortiz's reporting on the Astros, were probably shocked the other day to read Ortiz's announcement that Astros broadcaster Milo Hamilton was suffering from c ... More >>

Five Things To Change About Baseball

​Chron.com's Anna-Megan Raley had a posting last week dealing with what five changes you would make to baseball were you to become the commissioner. Then she lists the changes that would be made by Roy Oswalt, and Oswalt provided a somewhat decent list: decrease interdivisional matchups, shorten s ... More >>

"The Sports Animal" Does Some Shedding

Is one of the myriad sports-talk radio stations in town beginning to blink in their eyeball-to-eyeball-to-eyeball-to-eyeball battle?Clear Channel, the communications giant, swung the layoff ax across the country today, and it hit notably in Houston.The biggest names: Brad Davies and Craig Rober ... More >>

Channel 51 Owner Files For Bankruptcy Despite Stellar Schedule

Astros-Giants: Milo Hamilton Must Be Stopped!!!

The Five Worst Broadcasters in the History of Houston Sports

Astros-Nationals: One Game Over Five Hundred

Who's On Deck for the Houston Astros in 2008?

The Astros' post-Biggio era begins with a lot of unanswered questions, but the biggest one of all is: Just how bad are things going to get?

Spring Training: What a Glorious Place to Be, Unless Your Name Is Carlos Lee

Spring Training: Milo Hamilton, Harry Caray, Drayton McLane, Roger Clemens and Ria Cortesio

Spring Training: Roger Clemens, Bill Murray and Bill James

Dennis Miller Gets Another TV Show? Really?

John Royal's Astros Recap. In Song.

Re: Getting Rogered

On His Feet

Junction Jog

Don't Buy the Hype

A serial killer isn't getting out, no matter what TDCJ says

Know Your Astros! Quiz

Best Play-by-Play Announcer

Bill Brown

We'll Pay the Filing Fee...

NASA & Houston v. McLane, Dieker, and "Baseball Team"