Milwaukee

Survey Says Rice Is Fourth Healthiest College in the Country

Back when Hair Balls was carefully considering which college to attend (i.e., flipping a coin), we were mostly concerned with what campus had the most liquor stores within walking distance. The furthest thing from our mind was whether any dining hall menus offered chickpea masala, like Rice Universi ... More >>

Rockets Crush Mavs: 44-Point Third Buries Dallas, Probably Ruins Playoff Chances

It's never a bad thing when, in one night, you can absolutely destroy a Dallas sports franchise on the floor and, for all practical purposes, ruin their chances of making the playoffs. Given that the Rockets haven't beaten the Mavericks in nine straight tries leading up to last night's win at Toyota ... More >>

The Coathangers, Jaill

Sanctus Bellum Gallops Down Treacherous New Path on Sophomore Album

For a year supposedly prophesied by the ancient Mayans to herald the end of all existence, 2012 has been disappointingly doom-and-gloom free thus far. No ominous comets, no Biblical plagues -- not even a triple-digit heat wave yet. Luckily, local doom/classic metal band Sanctus Bellum is ready to ... More >>

Go Way Out to Eat: 5 Favorite Dining Destinations

Food & Wine magazine recently featured a series of articles on culinary destinations, or "...the world's best food pilgrimages," as they put it. While it was indeed interesting, I must say that places like Bangkok, Rome and India are just the tip of the iceberg when it comes to food travels. The ... More >>

Aeros Watching a Playoff Spot Slip-Slide Away

The old Paul Simon song goes "the nearer your destination, the more you're slip-slidin' away." He wasn't writing about hockey, but at this moment, there's nothing that applies more to the Houston Aeros because the nearer they get to the playoffs, the more the playoffs keep slip-slidin' away. Just t ... More >>

The 2nd Annual Main Street Block Party Announces Lineup

The Main Street Block Party is returning on January 28 to the The Continental Club, The Big Top, and The Mink's front and backrooms, armed with another great lineup, this time featuring Austin's What Made Milwaukee Famous and Dallas' hardcore cataclysm, Power Trip. The day-long festival was highly ... More >>

The Napkin Files: Deep Thoughts From Shallow Waters

Charles Simms/fineartamerica.comJoe's Cozy Corner in New Orleans​Lonesome Onry and Mean spends quite a bit of night time in bars and music venues writing random thoughts on bar napkins. Lots and lots of bar napkins. Usually LOM is laboring under the delusion that he's having a brilliant idea, ... More >>

Aeros Bombard Milwaukee, Move on to Next Playoff Round

John RoyalRobbie Earl and Casey Wellman celebrate Wellman's game-winning goal.​There were less than two minutes in the game. The scored was tied 2-2. The Admirals were bunched around the Aeros' net, trying to punch in shot attempt after shot attempt. Houston goalie Matt Hackett flailed abou ... More >>

Admirals Sink Aeros to Take Series to Game Seven

John RoyalThe Aeros celebrate as they take the lead.​The Houston Aeros were five minutes away. Five minutes away from pulling off the 4-3 win over the Milwaukee Admirals and advancing to the next round of the Calder Cup playoffs. Five minutes away from winning a game that, midway through the ... More >>

Aeros Torpedo Admirals In OT, Tie Series At 2-2

John RoyalCarson McMillan reacts to his game-winning shot​There's nothing more exciting in professional sports than playoff hockey. And there's nothing more exciting than playoff hockey that goes into overtime. Such was the case at Toyota Center last night when the Houston Aeros and Milwauke ... More >>

Aeros Implode, Fall Behind 2-1 in Playoff Round Two

John RoyalJared Spurgeon briefly gives the Aeros something to celebrate.​The Houston Aeros had plenty of chances to make things right last night. Like taking the early 1-0 lead off of a power play goal. Or, down 4-2 in the third, having the refs confer and change a no-goal call to goal. Or ... More >>

The Admirals Sink Houston As Aeros Fall Out of First Place

John RoyalThe Aeros celebrate Patrick O'Sullivan's first period goal​The Houston Aeros led the Milwaukee Admirals by a score of 4-2 with 16 minutes left in the third period. And while they hadn't been playing their best hockey, they did seem to be in control of the game. Then it was as if so ... More >>

Idol Beat: Viva Nash Vegas

​I was randomly scrolling back through past Idol Beats last night, doing my best to ignore mentally unbalanced dental hygienist Christine McCaffrey's butchering of "I Hope You Dance," when I realized something. The American Idol beat for Rocks Off is basically the Defense Against the Dark Arts ... More >>

Idol Beat: Schlemiel. Schlimazel.

​So it seems the only difference between the two-hour Wednesday Idols and their one hour counterparts on Thursdays is twice as many "wacky" interludes (über Green Bay Packer fan Megan Frazier is going to make one lucky man...really miserable someday) and a third more shots of Steven Tyler wal ... More >>

Idol Beat: "Home Of Pirates, Drunks And Whores..."

​If you want to go to hell, you should take a trip To the Sodom and Gomorrah on the Mississipp. -- The Simpsons I kid. I mean, I haven't always been the biggest fan of the Big Easy, but that's mostly because I used to routinely leave a third of my brain cells and most of the contents of my di ... More >>

Five Great Moments In Indecent Exposure

​Recently, Florida's lame-duck governor Charlie Crist has said he's considering pardoning Jim Morrison for his 1969 indecent exposure charge, stemming from The Doors' notorious Miami concert in which a drunken Lizard King swore numerous times and proceeded to whip it out onstage. Of course, Mo ... More >>

Astros Are Bobblehead Addicts Who Ignore Current Roster, Study Finds

Not current Astro players​First off, yes, someone does study bobblehead giveaways at major league parks. And does impressively charted presentations of them.That somebody is Craig Robinson of Flip Flop Flyball, who has produced a groundbreaking piece of research that demonstrates conclusively that ... More >>

Upcoming Events

Get ready for a boozy good time on Saturday.​Get your palates primed for the Texas Vodka Throwdown this Saturday night at Caroline Collective (4820 Caroline). The event, which runs from 6 to 9 p.m., is absolutely free (as long as you're over 21), but that's not the best part: The best part is ... More >>

Houston One Of Safest Cities In The Country, If You Look At It A Certain (Wrong, Houston Proud) Way

Photo courtesy GHCVB​Houston may be fat, polluted, sprawling and ugly, but it's got one thing going for it, according to Forbes magazine -- it's one of the safest cities in the country.Say what? Don't they read our Bayou Body Count? What, you go ten days without a murder and all of a sudden you're ... More >>

Halloween Countdown: How Best To Go For The `90s-Nostalgia Look

Halloween is coming, and that means many, many costuming mistakes will be made by normally sane adults. To help stop this scourge, each Thursday we will be offering tips and analysis of what to avoid, or possibly what to do. Check out past entries here and here. If VH1 has taught us nothing else, it ... More >>

The World Salivates At The Thought Of How Bad The New Dallas Cowboys Theme Song Might Be

The Dallas Cowboys will start the NFL season not only with a new stadium worth over a billion dollars, but with a new theme song we're betting will be worth decidedly less. We can only hope it is as offensively shitty as the team itself.Forbes magazine reports that the team has contracted with a spo ... More >>

Aeros Make Another Game Seven Escape, Head To Conference Finals

Photo by Fred Trask/The Third Intermission"If you can't get yourself ready for a game like this," Houston Aeros captain Clayton Stoner said Wednesday morning, "then you don't deserve to be here."The "here" was Milwaukee, Wisconsin. The game was Game Seven of the West Division Finals. The Aeros, who ... More >>

Reeling Aeros Face Elimination Tomorrow Night

Thursday night, Houston Aeros goalie Anton Khudobin stood on top of the world. He had just shut out the Milwaukee Admirals to put the Aeros up 3-1 in their best-of-seven series. It was his birthday, and he was standing at center ice as over 3,100 people sang Happy Birthday to him.But things change.W ... More >>

Aeros Get A Birthday Gift, Look To Close Out Milwaukee

Photo by Fred Trask/The Third IntermissionAnton Khudobin stood at mid-ice, blushing, a huge smile on his face. He was the number-one star of the game for the Houston Aeros. But that's not why he was blushing. He was blushing because, in unison, 3,189 fans inside of Toyota Center were singing "Happy ... More >>

Aeros Get Back To Their Winning Playoff Ways

Photo by Fred Trask/The Third IntermissionBefore yesterday's Game Three against the Milwaukee Admirals, Houston Aeros coach Kevin Constantine wanted his team to focus less on what the Admirals were doing and to focus more on their own play. He wasn't entirely happy with how his team ended up handlin ... More >>

Aeros Look To Get Back On Track Tonight

The Aeros pulled off a minor upset, defeating the Milwaukee Admirals 2-1 on Thursday night to win the first game of a best-of-seven series. And though they lost 4-1 on Saturday to Milwaukee, with the series retuning to Houston for three games this week, it's the Aeros who have the home-ice advantage ... More >>

Paint the Town

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Houston Aeros Slip Up Over Bad Weekend

Photo by Fred Trask The Houston Aeros came into this weekend in a tie for second place. They leave the weekend in fourth place. And though they were able to win one of three games played, the team didn't look good at anytime and, at one point, after Friday night's 6-1 loss to the Rockford IceHogs, ... More >>

Krys Kolanos Is Awesome. The Rest of the Aeros (and the Uniforms), Not So Much.

Photo by Fred Trask It's been about a month since I've seen the Houston Aeros play a game - they've been on the road and I've been on vacation. So I'm not really sure about what's going on with this team. They leapt out to a 5-0-0-0 start, which was the second best in team history. The 2008-09 Ae ... More >>

Downtown Store No One Ever Thought Was Open Is Closing

Downtown retail just can’t win for losing. Less than six weeks after the grand opening of the Houston Pavilions mixed use project, one of the classics bites the dust. Standard Shoes, the pimp-a-riffic footwear and accessory shop on the corner of Austin and Pease, is imminently shuttering. A S ... More >>

News Chopper Crash Shows The Dangers

The Tunnel Mole's Got A Lotta Problems With You People

Longing for Sports Sunday

Houston Aeros Finish Season in Third Place and Get Ready for Rockford IceHogs

Aeros Poised to Make the Playoffs

Houston Aeros Best Chicago Wolves But Fall to Peoria Rivermen and Milwaukee Admirals

Strange Brew

This Canadian cult classic sets Hamlet in a brewery

Aeros Lose to Milwaukee Admirals, Get Ready for Quad City Flames

High Steppin' in Rat City

Yours, Mine and Ours

What Made Milwaukee Famous

What Made Milwaukee Famous performs Friday, March 2, at Walter's on Washington, 4215 Washington, 713-862-2513. Dr. Dog also performs.

Don't Cry for Her, Israel

The Main Event

January 29 - February 1

This Week's Day-by-Day Picks

Protective Wrapping

Programs surround a kid and his family with services, hoping for success

Boys Camp

Juvenile to the core, Zombies from the Beyond mines junior-high locker rooms for jokes

News of the Weird

The Violent Femmes Perk Up

Milwaukee's finest recapture your youth

Like Father, Like Son

Spanic Boys make classic rock and roll a family affair