Oakland Athletics

Where Is Lil Wayne In the Lyrical Hot Water Hall of Fame?

Proving that it is almost never wise to compare the results of rough sex to Emmett Till's face, Lil Wayne was dropped from his Mountain Dew campaign last week. Emmett Till, for those of you who aren't familiar, was a 14-year-old boy who was beaten to death, shot, and dumped in the river for whistlin ... More >>

The Great CSN Houston Tax Scam

Everybody's pretty damn tired of the CSN Houston situation. Tired of being screwed out of Rockets games. Tired, maybe, of not being able to see the Astros get swept by the Oakland A's. Tired of watching CSN's Matt Hutchings constantly on the television and lying out of his teeth about who's responsi ... More >>

Top Five Things to Do in Houston Sports This Weekend: Dirt, Clay, Mud and Cheerleaders

TGIF, my children. It's time to rev up the weekend and get yo butt in gear. You may want to lie around on your couch watching the Final Four or spend some time absorbing "culture" at a "museum." I say blow all that crap out of the water with an ass kicking good time like any red blooded American. Ho ... More >>

One Man's (Idiotic?) 2013 Baseball Predictions

The major league baseball season opened up on Sunday night with the Rangers traveling to Rangers Ballpark in Arlington South to face the Astros. Most of the teams started up yesterday, and the rest of the league will get underway today. With the season getting underway, it's time once again to make ... More >>

The Astros: Out of Their League?

The Houston Astros take on a new season in a tough division with things all-new — uniforms, owner, manager, team and rules — not to mention a new/old mascot. And road trips to Dallas.

Houston Astros 2013: Season Win Total Prediction (And Four Other MLB Season Win Total Predictions)

Maybe it's because football keeps our attention year round (what up, Ed Reed?), maybe it's because we're right in the middle of March Madness, or maybe it's just because as a city we've been beaten down by a half a decade of mediocre to bad baseball, but goddamn, this baseball season snuck up on me! ... More >>

The Astros Will Suck, But They Do Have A Good Plan

The Houston Astros are a subject of much derision. They're a bad team with very few, if any, names on the roster recognizable to the average fan. They'll probably struggle to win 60 games. And there are national writers who think that the Astros are an embarrassment to baseball. I'm often critical ... More >>

Jim Crane and Charlie Finley: The Future Through The Past

A man buys a baseball team. He alienates the fans. He trades away all of the veterans with big contracts and attempts to build a team through the farm system. There's the threat of a forced move to another league. The other owners not wanting him in their club. And the commissioner treats him like a ... More >>

Things You Should Know About The Astros Trade (Including: Yes, The Astros Still Exist)

The baseball world was rocked to its core yesterday by a five-player trade between the Houston Astros and the Oakland A's. While the definition of "rocked to its core" may vary among baseball fans -- and "barely took notice" would be an acceptable, indeed unassailably factual, equivalent -- the tra ... More >>

Christmas Past: Top 10 Christmas Movie Soundtracks

While we celebrate the holidays, Rocks Off is resurrecting a few of our best Christmas-themed blogs from the past few years. (Wait... resurrecting is Easter. Never mind.) This blog originally appeared December 14, 2010. No doubt you have all been chin-deep in Christmas movies since you undid your b ... More >>

Astros Put Fans Out Of Their Misery And Fire Brad Mills

So the Astros bloodletting continued this weekend. Manager Brad Mills, hitting coach Mike Barnett, and first base coach Bobby Meacham were fired after Saturday night's embarrassing lost to the Arizona Diamondbacks. The firing of Mills was expected (as was the firing of most of the coaching staff) th ... More >>

Remembering the ABA: 5 Things That Would Never Happen in the NBA

Thirty-six years ago this week, avant-garde basketball went away when the American Basketball Association merged with the National Basketball Association. The old ABA (1967-1976) helped revolutionize the game through the invention of the three-point shot and the drafting of underclassmen. At one t ... More >>

Movies Houstonians Love: Moneyball

MLB: 4 Season Win Total Bets You Can Still Get Down on Before Friday Morning

Happy Major League Baseball Opening Day! Oh, what's that? You say I missed Opening Day? It was actually last night when the St. Louis Cardinals helped christen the Miami Marlins' new ball park (and new name and new uniforms and new manager and...) with a 4-1 win? Oh, I'm sorry, that was the domesti ... More >>

In Which John Royal Predicts the Winner of the 2012 World Series

The major league baseball season officially started last week when the Oakland A's and Seattle Mariners played two games in Tokyo. Most of the other teams open on Thursday, and the Astros get started on Friday when they host the Colorado Rockies. Thus, here are my predictions for this season. NATI ... More >>

Against All Odds, the Rockets Keep Winning

"Scrappy, man. Just scrappy." I was talking with a buddy of mine the other day and that was the phrase that seemed to be uttered by one of us more than once about this current rabble of players assembled by the Houston Rockets. They just keep winning despite the fact they have no identifiable star a ... More >>

The Year In Astros Baseball: Thank God That's Over

​So let's continue our look back at the sporting year that was 2011 by taking a look at the Top 25 events to happen to the Houston Astros. 1. They finished with the worst record in team history, which was quite the accomplishment seeing as how the Astros were pretty damn bad for most of the ... More >>

Astros Fire Ed Wade & Tal Smith: The New Era Begins

Where have you gone, Ed Wade? A nation's no-hit, aging, injury-prone free agent infielders turn their lonely eyes to you. Where have you gone, Ed Wade? A nation's worth of middle relievers looking for multimillion contracts turn their lonely eyes to you. Ed Wade is gone. So is Tal Smith. Jim C ... More >>

20 Ways the Astros Are Still Losing Even Though They're Not Playing

Yep, Ed Wade's even a fool in the movies.​This past season was a painful one to watch and endure for Houston Astros fans. But even in the off-season the painful hits just keep on coming. 20. The owner of the Texas Rangers, Nolan Ryan, is getting plenty of airtime from Fox and TBS every nigh ... More >>

Moneyball

Field of Statistically Knowable Dreams

Your 2011 Fall/Movie Preview (Part 1)

​Note: Pop Rocks will return next week. Labor Day has come and gone, which means the official start of the fall movie season is just around the corner. In fact, two of the more anticipated releases of latter 2011 -- Warrior and Contagion -- come out tomorrow. After what has been widely rega ... More >>

Astros To The American League? That's The Latest Rumor

Wait, what, the Astros to the AL?​If you were at one of the Astros games this weekend against the Braves -- and judging by the attendance figures, many of you weren't -- then you were probably annoyed by the idiot Braves fans doing that stupid tomahawk chop thing they do. But things could be ... More >>

The Beauty of Short Hops: Or, Come Back Ken Tremendous, A Nation Turns Its Lonely Eyes To You

​Author Michael Lewis wrote this book around the turn of the century that has dominated baseball discussion, for good and bad, ever since. This book, Moneyball, dealt with the efforts of Oakland A's general manager Billy Beane to field a competitive team despite not having the payroll to comp ... More >>

Play Ball, Baby

A new season for the Astros, and hopefully a new team.

One Man's Predictions for This Baseball Season

​Believe it or not, it's time, yet again, for the Major League Baseball season to get underway. That's good news for those of us who enjoy watching the best players in baseball play the best sport ever created. That's bad news, however, for us Astros fans because, well, the Astros suck. But ... More >>

Top 10 Christmas Movie Soundtracks

​No doubt you have all been chin-deep in Christmas movies since you undid your belt on Thanksgiving evening. Rocks Off made sure to steal a copy of National Lampoon's Christmas Vacation from our folks' house before the calendar even hit December. Unlike other blogs, we don't hate all Christm ... More >>

The Post-Oswalt Astros: Oy

Bye-bye, dude​The seemingly impossible happened yesterday, as the Astros front office found a moment of competence and finally found a way to trade Roy Oswalt.Of course, this being the Astros' front office, Oswalt ended up with the Philadelphia Phillies in a deal about as surprising as Gary Kubiak ... More >>

Game Time: Nomar Retires And Heads To The Place Ballplayers Go to Die.....ESPN

​I've worked several places in my lifetime, most of them in the corporate world. Easily, my favorite place I've worked is with my current employer, 1560 The Game. After watching Nomar Garciaparra's feel-good press conference this week where he announced his retirement on the heels of a one-day c ... More >>

Game Time: The Lost Speech Of Yankee GM Brian Cashman

​So the Yankees are World Champions. Yippee. Between watching Kobe tear out the Rockets' collective heart last night, and then having to flip over to Fox to watch Alex Rodriguez' post-game celebration (rehearsed in the mirror no fewer than 100 times, no doubt), November 4, 2009, will live in inf ... More >>

Make The Astros Better: Forget Free Agents

Photo by Aaron M. Sprecher​A friend sent me this Richard Justice blog post over the weekend, then he asked, given the premise that Drayton McLane was going to allow unlimited spending for next season's team, just what it was that I would do.  First, unlike one of Justice's suggestions, I woul ... More >>

Richard Justice, Jeff Bagwell, Jose Canseco & Steroids

Richard Justice is up on his high-horse again, this time in defense of himself, his colleagues, and Jeff Bagwell. The subject, surprisingly, is steroids. And Justice is pissed that there are people out there who happen to believe that he might have known what was going on during the late-`80s, `90s ... More >>

Hard Economic Times Coming To Sports Franchises

The NHL doesn't have a team in Houston, so I'm pretty confident that most of you don't follow the league, and don't have any idea about some of the severe financial problems facing many of the southern teams.  The NHL has intervened in Phoenix in an attempt to find new ownership for the club.&n ... More >>

This Season's MLB Predictions: The American League

With baseball season due to start next week, I thought I should put myself on the line and make some predictions. I'm going to do the American League today. I'll follow up with the National League and postseason picks tomorrow, and I'll give a more in-depth look at the Astros on Monday. So here' ... More >>

Miguel Tejada Expected to Plead Guilty of Perjury; A-Rod Still a Scapegoat

At ten o'clock this morning, a federal prosecutor and Miguel Tejada will appear in front of a U.S. District Court judge and a six-page criminal information will be entered before the Court. It is expected that, at that time, Tejada will plead guilty to lying before Congress. It is thought that t ... More >>

Miguel Tejada Expected to Plead Guilty of Perjury; A-Rod Still a Scapegoat

At ten o'clock this morning, a federal prosecutor and Miguel Tejada will appear in front of a U.S. District Court judge and a six-page criminal information will be entered before the Court. It is expected that, at that time, Tejada will plead guilty to lying before Congress. It is thought that t ... More >>

Ten Other Instances of "Sloppy Seconds"

Sean Avery of the NHL's Dallas Stars was suspended for an indefinite period by the NHL on Tuesday for comments he made in Calgary on Tuesday. Speaking to reporters, he made a comment about several players dating his "sloppy seconds." And I know most of you in Houston would rather talk high school fo ... More >>

Play Ball: John Royal’s MLB Predictions

Pro Athlete Musicians

Athletes step off the field and into the studio

Rocket Science: Daryl Morey Brings Hard-Core Statistical Analysis to the NBA

Houston's pro basketball team pins (at least a part of ) its hopes on a brainiac GM

Cover Story: Daryl Morey, Statistical Analysis and the Houston Rockets

God’s Team, Jobu, Matt Holliday and Drayton McLane

Could Terry Ryan Be a Good Candidate for Astros GM? Maybe. Will He Be? Probably Not.

Jesus Ortiz Is a Fool

An Accountability Moment

Mixed Media

But He Seemed So Psyched in All Those Photos...

The Elephant in the Room

Take Me Out...

...to the ball game. Lauding baseball-in-rock's finest moments.

Return to Normalcy

The Chronicle gets back to business as usual

Minibill

Rube Waddell