Paris Hilton

  • Blogs

    August 9, 2013

    The 10 Suckiest Bands of the '00s

    Okay, guys. Enough with the nostalgia shows already. We know you've noticed it, the sudden influx of '90s nostalgia bands that have made their way back on tour. Up until this point, it was fine to dig up a few musical memories while listening to an aging band play their radio hits, because the '90 ... More >>

  • Film

    May 23, 2013
  • Blogs

    November 12, 2012

    Mugshot Etiquette 101: Don't Smile Unless You Did Something Cool

    Every day here at Hair Balls we get to see great, sad, and dumbfounding mugshots from around the state of Texas. We sure do have a lot of criminals in the Lone Star State. Makes me fearful of seceding in 2025. REWIND: Sean Payne: Humble Man Too Drunk To Pose for His Mugshot REWIND: Michael Jordan ... More >>

  • Blogs

    July 13, 2012

    This Week in Deliciousness: Eatin' With Sticks and Other Bad Ideas

    Welcome back to the weekly roundup here at Eating Our Words, where thanks to this week's plentiful rains, our blood oranges are now constantly being carried off by vulture-sized mosquitoes who don't understand the hyperbolic nature of fruit-naming. IT REFERS TO THE COLOR, YOU BUZZING BASTARDS. We s ... More >>

  • Blogs

    March 22, 2012

    Bumbaklat Hits: Pop's 10 Most Unforgivable Reggae Misappropriations

    Can you feel it yet? Don't let all this rain fool you -- Summer is on its way. Sure, that means triple-digit temperatures, mutant mosquitos and Astros-fan apathy, but it also means live music outdoors. And where there's live music outdoors, there is always reggae. It's some kind of rule. Persona ... More >>

  • Blogs

    March 7, 2012

    Christina Hendricks, Olivia Munn, Scarlett Johansson: 22 Famous Leaked Cell Phone Pics That Stopped All Office Productivity

    This past Sunday, naughty cell phone pictures of both Mad Men's redheaded bombshell Christina Hendricks and television personality Olivia Munn leaked onto the Internet. No, they weren't together in the photos -- Dear God -- these were separate leaks. Two of the most lusted after female celebs, Hend ... More >>

  • Blogs

    March 5, 2012

    Top 9 Comments On Summer Fest 2012: Where's The Women?

    As most of Houston and the surrounding area knows by now, Free Press Summer Fest announced its 2012 lineup in the wee hours this morning. By now Rocks Off has had a few more hours to reflect on the festival, entering its fourth year at Eleanor Tinsley Park June 2 and 3, and also to take a shower. O ... More >>

  • Blogs

    November 1, 2011

    Pop Rocks: Hey, Plenty Of Things Didn't Last 73 Days, Kim Kardashian Haters

    I'm shocked, shocked to hear Kim and Kris are getting divorced.​If you had the 73-day "under" on the length of Kim Kardashian's marriage to Kris Humphries (AKA The Most Blatant Gambit to Maintain Consecutive Gossip Mag Covers Since Paris Hilton Exited A Car Sans Panties), you just doubled your ... More >>

  • Blogs

    October 5, 2011

    7 Musician Exes (Or Daughters) Who Should Write Tell-All Books

    7. Dita Von Teese (Marilyn Manson): Famed burlesque performer Dita Von Teese (above) met Marilyn Manson in 2001. He proposed in 2004, and the couple wed a year later. Von Teese filed for divorce when she couldn't deal with Manson's alcohol abuse and his extramarital affair with actress Evan Rachel W ... More >>

  • Calendar

    May 12, 2011
  • Blogs

    April 5, 2011

    Imran Mynuddin: He's Not Stalking His Former Psychiatrist, He's Just Trying to Help

    Paris Hilton: Another overriding interest of this dude​It's only April, but thanks to KHOU, we became aware of a top contender for the Alleged Creep of the Year Award: Imran Mynuddin has been charged in Harris County on suspicion of stalking his former psychiatrist, who's now on the faculty of ... More >>

  • Blogs

    January 26, 2011

    Internet Gives Thanks For "Based God" Lil B

    ​2010 was a big year for Berkeley, California's Lil B, aka "The Based God." He taught the world how to "Cook," supplied his disciples with new gospel almost daily, and graced the cover of The Fader. Now at 21 years old and only a month into the new year, he's released a digital album, been i ... More >>

  • Blogs

    January 21, 2011

    Ten Movies You Won't Get Into at Sundance

    ​The Sundance Film Festival kicks off this week in Park City, Utah. The venerable fest enters its 33rd year with many once again questioning the organizers' commitment to independent film. Recent incarnations have debuted underground fare from art houses like Fox Searchlight and Sony Pictures ... More >>

  • Film

    December 23, 2010

    Lost at the Chateau Marmont

    From party girl to Oscar winner, Sofia Coppola's journey to Somewhere.

  • Blogs

    September 17, 2010

    Musicians Who Will Fetch The Least In TwitChange Auction

    ​TwitChange, a charity organization dedicated to helping Haiti led by the only Desperate Housewife who doesn't look at least partially mummified, Eva Longoria, is having an auction that will change the very nature of self-obsession as we know it. Several celebrities have gotten together and ag ... More >>

  • Blogs

    June 21, 2010

    No Lady Gaga: Celebrities We Wish Had Sex Dolls Made Of Them

    He's no Johnny Depp​Yesterday on the Rocks Off blog we unveiled the Lady Gaga sex doll, Lady Gag Gag. Comments were mixed on the doll, ranging from utter confusion and strange attraction from both sexes. One commenter claimed that the model on the box was even more attractive than the real G ... More >>

  • Blogs

    June 17, 2010

    Take A Ride On Your Disco Stick: The Lady Gaga Sex Doll

    Over the next year Houstonians will get three chances to see Lady Gaga in the flesh, with two shows next month at Toyota Center and another one in spring at the same venue. We are pretty sure all three have now sold out, so if any of you little monsters haven't got an in on some tickets you may ... More >>

  • Blogs

    April 22, 2010

    Five Absolutely Cringeworthy Restaurant Commercials

    By now, we've all seen the commercial for Jones' Good Ass BBQ & Foot Massage. Sadly, the video with the dancing chickens, catchy jingle and promise of a pedicure with the finest honey barbecue sauce in Illinois was too terrible to be true. Fortunately, there are plenty of actual commercials for r ... More >>

  • Blogs

    December 21, 2009

    Houston Gets Three Spots In The Decade's Pantheon Of Great New York Post Headlines

    ​Even if you have no idea what Phil Mushnick and Andrea Peyser have in common (answer: they're both New York Post columnists), you're probably aware of the great and noble tradition of tasteless, eye-grabbing headlines written by the New York tabloid. "Headless Body in Topless Bar" and all that. ... More >>

  • Blogs

    August 31, 2009

    Our WTF Crime Story Of The Day: Paris Hilton & Child Porn

    Photo courtesy MTV​Anyone who likes child porn has obviously got mental problems, but usually they're not completely idiotic -- after all, they have to find a way to indulge their sickness without being caught by the feds.And then there's 22-year-old Josiah Samuel Stevens on Conroe.He just got fiv ... More >>

  • Calendar

    June 18, 2009

    Hotel ZaZa Unleashed Poolside Pet Soiree

    It's canines and canapés for the see-and-be-seen crowd

  • Blogs

    March 27, 2009

    Embarassing Moments In TV Cooking History: Welcome to the List, Padma

    Padma Lakshmi isn't technically a celebrity chef. Yes, she's published two cookbooks and hosted/starred in an array of food-related programming. But she's also known for plenty of other endeavors, chief among them being married to Salman Rushdie and her career as a highly successful Indian model/act ... More >>

  • Blogs

    January 7, 2009

    Carl's Jr. Coming to a Corner (and TV Screen) Near You

    From the Houston Business Journal comes news that burger franchise Carl's Jr. will be opening over 100 stores in Texas, with several planned for the Houston area.  Although it's not yet known how many Carl's Jr.'s will be opened or where they'll be located, hamburger enthusiasts are already sta ... More >>

  • Blogs

    December 18, 2008

    Lonesome Onry and Mean: Envy, You're Up

    Best In Texas music magazine can breathe a sigh of relief this month. We've found a new publication of supreme arrogance and ineptitude to ponder and dissect. Other than pedophiles, no group of people pisses Lonesome Onry & Mean off more than Elitist Pricks. Dallas is full of them -- not that Hous ... More >>

  • Blogs

    November 5, 2008
  • Blogs

    October 30, 2008

    Whitney Casey's Glamour Collection

    We have long since given up trying to devote any time to the odd, gushing, almost-English ramblings of Whitney Casey, the former local talk-show host who is now writing a Houston Chronicle column on "relationships." Casey, you'll remember, is the self-promoter who turned a brief stint on an unwatch ... More >>

  • Blogs

    March 26, 2008

    Seven Deadly Sins: Celebrity Edition

    In an effort to stay hip with the times (always the Vatican’s primary objective, right?), the Catholic Church has decreed that there are seven new deadly sins (now, even deadlier!) that will accompany the old-fashioned original seven we’ve all come to know and love so well. The new ones inclu ... More >>

  • Blogs

    March 21, 2008

    Paris Hilton Does Her Best Angelina Jolie Impression

    Okay, give me second…give me second. Okay. I’ve caught my breath now. Wooh. All right. Paris Hilton went to Africa and hung out with poor kids. So you see why I was laughing. I mean, oh my God. Apparently accompanying her current boyfriend Benji Madden of the pop punk band Good Charlot ... More >>

  • Culture

    January 3, 2008
  • Blogs

    January 2, 2008

    Resolutions of the Rich and Famous

    While the rest of us are trying to drop ten pounds, stop living at Target, and cut back to just drinking in the evening (or maybe that’s just yours truly), it seems to me that a certain number of celebrities out there need to make some resolutions as well. So here are my suggestions for the ric ... More >>

  • Culture

    November 22, 2007
  • Blogs

    October 11, 2007
  • Blogs

    October 10, 2007

    Miss Pop Rocks: Things That Will Last Longer Than Pam Anderson’s Marriage to Rick Salomon

    Okay, so our gal Pammy and the Paris Hilton sex tape guy, Rick Salomon, supposedly got hitched this past weekend in (crazily enough) Las Vegas. It is the third marriage for both, and, according to People, it was a quickie affair that took place in between Pam’s two scheduled magic shows. (What?! ... More >>

  • Blogs

    September 4, 2007
  • Blogs

    August 29, 2007

    Miss Pop Rocks: My Day with Britney

    I just don’t think this would be a pop culture blog without the required Britney Spears post. So in light of all that’s happened to her recently, here goes. Sure, there were more provocative photos out there we could've run, but we wouldn't do that to our BFF. First, let me say Britney has ... More >>

  • Film

    August 9, 2007

    The Popcorn King

    Rush Hour 3 director Brett Ratner has been called a fauxteur, a womanizer and, worse, over budget. Why you should take him seriously anyway.

  • Blogs

    July 27, 2007

    Keeping Dry Down Below with the Tunnel Mole

    Don your sturdiest running shoes whilst entering the downtown Houston tunnel system these days. With the chronic rain, the burgeoning population is starting to outnumber the folks who (just like Paris Hilton) "discovered" Jesus in jail. No celebrity sightings down here, however, unless you count an ... More >>

  • Blogs

    July 20, 2007

    Gonna Be an Earthquake

    Comic Earthquake comes to town on Saturday with a show that he promises is "more mature." The comedian, who has had specials on HBO, BET and Comedy Central, says his show is definetely for adults. "It''s a little more sophisticated, on the topics that's going on." While much of his work centers on r ... More >>

  • Blogs

    June 8, 2007
  • Music

    December 21, 2006

    Making Scents of the Stars

    A buyer's guide to celebrity fragrances

  • Music

    September 14, 2006

    Pop Quiz

    A quick check of your pop-princess savvy

  • Music

    July 20, 2006

    GWAR Heroes Electro Grrl

    Flying filth will never go out of style with these guys around

  • Calendar

    April 6, 2006
  • Music

    April 6, 2006

    Number of the Beeyotch

    The Iron Maidens encourage you to bring your daughter to the slaughter

  • Music

    March 23, 2006

    Mtley Cre

    Friday, March 24, Toyota Center, 1510 Polk, 713-758-7200

  • Calendar

    January 19, 2006
  • Music

    March 31, 2005

    Neil Hamburger, with Tennessee

    Thursday, March 31, at Mary Jane's Fat Cat, 4216 Washington Avenue, 713-869-5263.

  • Music

    February 10, 2005

    Radio Daze

    One man, one jambox and four walls. For 24 hours.

  • Calendar

    February 12, 2004

    A Glimpse of Stocking

    Old-fashioned shocks abound in Fallen Angels

  • Culture

    December 18, 2003

    A Fan's Notes

    Ideas that were forgotten but not gone in 2003

  • More >>