It is, after all, almost 2014. And we know that the beginnings of what political scientists call the "invisible primary" are well underway -- i.e., the GOP (and the Dems, but more on that in another post) elites are already deciding who is a viable presidential candidate and ideologically trustworth ... More >>
The Onion, as it so often does, hits the nail on the head regarding political ignorance with this "headline": "Man Who Understands 8% Of Obamacare Vigorously Defends It From Man Who Understands 5%." The satirical headline is simply highlighting the commonplace that Americans simply do not know much ... More >>
The action is awesome, but does that hurt the message?
At some point, Texas will give up its status as a GOP guarantee. That seems the consensus, at least. A burgeoning Hispanic population, increasing transplants from California and New York, and a youth bubble surpassed by only Utah -- all signs point toward an eventual purpling of this putative Republ ... More >>
Some you are moping around the city still upset about the Texans loss. I hear you on the sports radio all angry and frustrated and depressed. Sad Texan fan is sad. But time to buck up there, Jimmy sadface. The season for the Texans is over and it's ok. Now, you don't have to even think about the Sup ... More >>
Thanks a lot Christians, for not showing up.You disgust me.— Victoria Jackson (@vicjackshow) November 7, 2012 Amidst the pundits and the graphics and the touch screen monitors and the iPads strapped to the arms of The Daily Show's John Oliver, probably the most watched network on election ni ... More >>
"There will be weeping there, and gnashing of teeth or something I guess..." -- Luke 13:28, A Copy Of The Bible I Swiped From A Hotel Room Hello and welcome to Hair Balls' election night live blog and comment, where tonight I will be chronicling the mania of the 2012 presidential ... More >>
I don't know about you guys, but when I looked at the crop of Republican presidential candidates about a year ago, as the media and primary wars waged on, I could only think about what they would look like jogging or working out. It's a hidden hot-button issue. Depraved, mindless people like me vote ... More >>
Your past lives probably didn't love Cloud Atlas, either.
Put that grin away, Joe Biden. Thing's loaded. Last night at the vice presidential debate, Biden, ebullient and smirking, did everything Democrats wanted him to do. He was a jerk. He was aggressive. And he wouldn't let Paul Ryan get away with anything. Also, he said the peculiar word "marlarky" a l ... More >>
"Sensual, powerful, Biden." So says The Onion. Vice President Joe Biden has been quite possibly the most-parodied man over the last four years. Gregarious, toothy, and with that "Hey-just-call-me-Joe" air about him, he's been the exact opposite of Obama, who's brains and little fire. Biden, meanwhi ... More >>
On the campaign trail, there's not a moment that goes unused. BlackBerries -- oh, the BlackBerries. While the iPhone triumphs in the general population, it appears the only subspecies of man still trolling with BlackBerries are the political stooges and groupies. Every time there's a lapse in schedu ... More >>
At first, it seemed strange that, on one of the most important nights for Democrats, they would open with a a guy with a sprawling white smile who no one had heard of before. But hey, Dems must have thought, it worked in 2004 -- why not play this hand again? So they did, trotting out Julian Castro ... More >>
We have some great commenters here on Hair Balls, and it's time we paid some damn attention to them. So we'll be highlighting a Comment of the Day each morning or afternoon from the previous day's work. Maybe two comments, even. This will all be determined by a highly rigorous scientific formula i ... More >>
For a moment, let's talk fantasy. Let's say Mitt Romney somehow overcomes all of his apparent weakness -- Bain Capital rapaciousness, tax-record speculation, rich-guy aloofness -- and somehow ekes past President Obama in November in one of the narrowest victories in recent American politics. Democra ... More >>
Our sister paper Miami New Times is hard at work covering the 2012 Republican convention in Florida. To which we say Thank Christ because, you know, someone has to. We did our time in the Dome in 1992. New Times' Victor Gonzalez has been roaming the halls, looking for the mementoes available to att ... More >>
Ah, the Republican National Convention. Glitz. Glamour. Ted Cruz -- our newly-anointed Texan conservative savior -- saying really dumb things. And Christianity. Lots and lots of Christianity. But first, back to Cruz, who's scheduled to address the convention tonight. So here's the deal: This is his ... More >>
This week Republicans from around the country gather in Florida to celebrate all things conservative and curse Issac for stealing the national spotlight. For me the 2012 Republican National Convention marks the true start of the presidential campaign season, the playoffs to the primaries' regular se ... More >>
From cash-hungry strippers to protesters dressed as vaginas.
In his first national, mainstream media appearance since the Republican Senate nominee won the runoff election late last month, Ted Cruz displayed on Meet The Press yesterday what propelled him past Lt. Gov. David Dewhurst last month in the runoff: An ability to say pretty things, and make everyone ... More >>
It seems like several lifetimes ago, but in fact it was exactly one year ago today that the world got its first full day of Rick Perry, presidential candidate. With all the pomp, not to mention circumstance, attendant on such an august occasion, the governor of Texas deigned to allow voters to elev ... More >>
Here's a Video of the Entire Geto Boys Show From Saturday's Juggalo Gathering We've all asked the question, believers or non-believers alike: "Where's God?" In times of personal trial, family strife, financial disaster, or just sailing the choppy seas of relationships, when we need some sort of sup ... More >>
Wall Street and Washington conspire to destablize the U.S. economy, one barrel of oil at a time.