Prince William of Wales

Rocket Man: Elton John's 5 Greatest Characters

Great songwriters create great characters. Elton John has a plethora in his songs some real like Princess Diana, and others purely fictional. The stories he tells in his songs are what makes him one of the greatest artists ever to come from Great Britain. His characterizations have even been celebr ... More >>

Best-Selling Single Of All Time "Candle In The Wind 1997" Turns 15 Years Old

Re-written in the wake of his friend Princess Diana's car accident death on August 31, 1997, Elton John's "Candle In The Wind" was merely a maudlin tribute to Marilyn Monroe before tragedy struck. Diana died from her wounds in a Paris road tunnel crash, along with her boyfriend Dodi Fayed, and the d ... More >>

Snow White and the Huntsman

The latest Snow White is a tale overtold.

Woodlands Wine & Food Week to Take Place June 4 to 10

Food and wine lovers, rejoice. Just a few short days away is a big-time celebration of gourmet cuisine and marvelous vino. The annual Woodlands festival, put on by the event-planning extraordinaires at Food and Vine Time Productions, and now in its eighth year, is slated to draw more than 10,000 att ... More >>

Tears In Heaven: The 10 Best Songs To Come Out Of Tragedy

Since the dawn of time, great art has been birthed out of great tragedy, happening numerous times with playwrights, artists, and musicians. In many ways, expressing grief through music serves as a healing agent that gets the artist through tough things such as the loss of a loved one. It also helps ... More >>

Capsule Stage Reviews: Damaged Divas of the Decades, Farragut North, Goodbye Charlie, Kissless the Musical, Once Upon a Mattress, A Triumph of Love

Capsule Stage Reviws: Damaged Divas of the Decades, Once Upon a Mattress, Sylvia

Capsule Stage Reviews: Once Upon a Mattress, Sylvia

The Royal Wedding Gets Even Cheesier at Central Market

​I don't know what I was expecting when I heard that Central Market was hosting Sarah "The Cheese Lady" Kaufmann over the weekend, who was prepared to carve a portrait of William and Catherine -- the new Duke and Duchess of Cambridge -- out of a giant wheel of Cheddar cheese in honor of the ro ... More >>

Pop Rocks: How To Profit Off The Royal Wedding

$100 gets you $10000 if V blows up Parliament​The big day is finally almost upon us. After months of sweaty anticipation by domestic news agencies, Prince William of Wales will marry Kate Middleton at Westminster Abbey "on the morrow," as they say (probably) over there. That is, unless one of ... More >>

English Desserts for the Royal Wedding

Flickr user: Allerina & Glen MacLartyBanoffee Pie​Well, ladies, the jig is up. It's official; none of us will be the future queen of England. As the world waits with bated breath to see what Kate Middleton will wear, whether anyone will make a faux pas, and how much better Prince Harry will lo ... More >>

Royal Wedding Can Go On: Annise Parker Has Given Her Blessing

Jessica Michan​Ending months of increasingly frantic nervous speculation by Prince William and (especially) Kate Middleton, Mayor Annise Parker has greatly eased their mind by officially writing a congratulatory letter, the last big hurdle before any Royal Wedding in London. Preparations for F ... More >>

The Royal Wedding: Five Ominous Signs In Their Astrological Charts

The official photo of engagement happiness​Prince William and Kate Middleton are getting married this week, as you might have heard. The happy couple will be literally following in the footsteps of Prince Charles and Diana, and we all know how well that turned out. What do things look like f ... More >>

Upcoming Events

Want to see someone carve Prince William's face in this cheese? Of course you do.​Yes, it's Easter weekend, which means -- for some of you -- an extra day off and making extravagant dining plans for Sunday which involve uncomfortable clothing and your aunt who wears too much perfume. If you do ... More >>

Garden Fresh: The Cucumber

​Sick of the Royal Wedding? Not me. Prince William of Wales and Catherine Middleton don't seem to give a damn themselves, which spares us the fairytale nightmare that doomed his mother. Furthermore, Prince Charles is the new Godfather of organic agriculture, so he gets auto-props from this ... More >>

Pop Rocks: The Black Hole of Infotainment

Jesus christ...​I wonder sometimes if we're approaching the singularity in entertainment reporting. A "singularity," as we all know, is the point in which gravitational forces cause matter to have an infinite density and zero volume. If we define "density" as "number of stories and/or article ... More >>

Like the Obamas Wanted to Go to Your Stupid Royal Wedding Anyway

The invite the Obamas -- and you -- didn't receive​Despite having cast off the shackles of the British monarchy over 230 years ago, our great nation has yet to free itself of the embarrassingly colonial obsession with all matters concerning the Royal Family. A cursory scan of Google News yest ... More >>

Prince William's Bachelor Party: A Snoopadelic Recap

Photo illustrations by John Seaborn GrayClick image to enlarge (trust us on this one)​When Rocks Off saw a press release with the subject line, "SNOOP DOGG RELEASES BRAND NEW SONG FOR PRINCE WILLIAM'S BACHELOR PARTY," we assumed perhaps April Fool's had arrived early. Last week, you see, whe ... More >>

A Royal Pain In The Ass

​And I was still suffering residual boredom from the last one. I have to give our media credit; unemployment still hovering around 10%, cholera spreading to the Dominican Republic from Haiti, and terror threats abroad, and every morning news show has devoted a good 20 minutes of programming e ... More >>

Royal Wedding: The Five Hottest Royal Brides In History

Hair Balls was positively ecstatic to learn that Prince William is getting hitched to longtime girlfriend Kate Middleton. Although the wedding isn't planned until 2011, we're already worrying over what to wear, and what to get the happy couple (we're pretty sure they'll register at Target). But in t ... More >>

Prince William: Who's Playing The Royal Wedding?

Now, if it were Prince Harry's wedding...​Sorry, ladies. Prince William is (almost!) officially off the market. When the future King of England officially announced his engagement to girlfriend Kate Middleton earlier today, Rocks Off instantly envisioned potential entertainers for the couple' ... More >>

John Goodman, Bazillionaire Polo Patron, Awaits Possible Charges In Fatal Palm Beach Bentley Wreck

Randall Patterson's 1998 feature on Houston / Palm Beach polo patron John Goodman ends with the billionaire playboy getting a champagne bath. Right now, Palm Beach police want to know if he also soaked in a little too much booze last Thursday night. That was when Goodman, the founder of the Palm B ... More >>