Shaquille O'Neal

The Best of Coachella, Weekend One

Ed. Note: Rocks Off proudly presents to our readers coverage of Coachella's first weekend courtesy of our sister papers LA Weekly and OC Weekly. Karen O's Outfit Karen O's wardrobe on Friday night was bad-ass. The Yeah Yeah Yeahs front woman appeared on the main stage in a technicolor cape draped o ... More >>

Goodwill Ambassador

Kenny Smith on All-Star Weekend and His Eventual Return to Clutch City

The Jet Loves Houston: Kenny Smith on All-Star Weekend and His Eventual Return to Clutch City

Former Rockets guard and current member of the best pre-game sports show on television, Kenny Smith, is a big fan of Houston, calling his ties here "deep rooted." "People I consider my best friends in the world are still in Houston," Smith told Hair Balls. "My godchildren are there." The NBA and i ... More >>

Houston YouTube History: The Houston Rockets

For this edition of Houston YouTube History, I dived into the Houston Rockets' YouTube stamp. There are tons of random clips of games, which are pretty recent, but those are boring rips from cable TV. I wanted weird stuff that you may have forgotten about. Not that you would have forgotten their f ... More >>

"Rap Up" MC Skillz Talks Retiring, Ghostwriting and "Popcorn Music"

Skillz may not be a household name, but he's had a crazy interesting career in hip-hop. He's shared the mike on a track with Dave Chappelle, written songs for some of rap's biggest names, and beefed with Shaquille O'Neal. Had YouTube existed in 2002, Skillz may have been one of the first viral sens ... More >>

NBA Commish David Stern Asks Jim Rome "Have You Stopped Beating Your Wife Yet?"

"Have you stopped beating your wife yet?" -- NBA Commissioner David Stern in what I hope was a rhetorical question to Jim Rome, 6/13/12 Since the first NBA Draft Lottery in 1985 gift-wrapped Patrick Ewing to the downtrodden New York Knicks, there have been conspiracy theorists galore that have sur ... More >>

NBA Finals: Series Prediction and a Few Prop Bets

Finally, it's here! If you had allowed David Stern to sit in a room with all 16 playoff teams on the wall by conference, and allow him to pick his dream matchup for the NBA Finals, it's without a doubt the Miami-Oklahoma City matchup we're getting here. LeBron versus Durant, big market versus small ... More >>

NBA Lucky Sperm Club: Javale McGee's Video Resume (Including His Moronic Goaltending Last Night)

Lucky Sperm Club. It's a term I often use for professional athletes who, if they weren't so genetically gifted, would be super-sizing french fries at the drive-through for the next 60 years. To be clear, the term is not meant for all physical freaks. Just the ones who display an IQ somewhere betwee ... More >>

Some Perspective on Ndamukong Suh's Cheap Shot (w/ VIDEO)

In what was easily the most significant Thanksgiving Day game played in Detroit in the last ten years, the Green Bay Packers ran their record to 11-0 by beating the Lions pretty soundly 27-15. After the game, the big story had nothing to do with the Packers' chasing history, nor did people want to ... More >>

We Can't Be Stopped: Best Houston Album Ever Turns 20 Years Old

​Today is the 20th anniversary of the release of the Geto Boys' We Can't Be Stopped. It is the most important Houston album of all time. Everyone understands this reflexively, even if they don't understand why they understand that. It has likely been written about more than any other piece o ... More >>

Ask A (Producer For) Rapper(s)

Chris Rockaway​The hip-hop world is a less than sensible place - lots of times, you're even required to clarify when bad means bad and when bad means good - so once a week we're going to get with a rapper and ask them to explain things. Something you always wanted to ask a rapper? Email introd ... More >>

NCAA Sweet Sixteen Central

What the hell happened to Leslie Visser?​It's generally accepted that the first two full days of the NCAA Men's Basketball Tournament provide the greatest two-day watching/gambling/drinking/eating experience annually, for obvious reasons: 1. Whether by illness, approved vacation, or planned s ... More >>

December 9, 2013 Headline: Hunter Pence Signs With Pirates For 7 Years, $168M

Rich people making baseball decisions​Most major league baseball owners are billionaires or, at the very least, incredibly wealthy leaders of investor groups. And I'm pretty sure you have to be smart to become a billionaire (although I am admittedly very smart, and I regularly get excited whe ... More >>

NBA 2010-2011 Preview -- Reconstructing LeBron

Please, no more operations on Yao Ming​"What should I do?" -- LeBron James, over and over and over again his new Nike spot The fact that LeBron James is posing the question in his new Nike spot perhaps tells us that he is not completely devoid of self-awareness, as he appeared to be last summer. ... More >>

The 7 Basic WWE Metaphors For Real Life Situations (w/ video)

Let's get ready to....examine life!!!​I'm working on my 2009-2010 NBA Preview which should be done by tomorrow. I hope that some of you will cut me slack given that a whopping three games will be in the books by the time it gets posted here on Hair Balls, including the Rockets opener against the L ... More >>

First Play: E. Wood's "Dirty Harry" Vs. Coast's "Tonight You're A Star"

Houston exists largely as its own market. As such, rappers here tend to not like to -on the record, anyway- rank themselves or their albums or songs against each other or each other's. So we'll do it for them. Email sheaserrano (at) gmail (dot) com. ​The Songs: This week, we've got relative n ... More >>

Houston's 10 Best Sports Moments*

*And the 5 most heartbreaking...

Game Time: Best of the Best -- Top 10 Moments from Clutch City Rockets (w/video)

Consensus Number One​I am a total sucker for lists.This makes me like roughly 95 percent of society; the fact that I openly admit I'm a sucker for lists makes me a little more unique. There are so many list books, list columns, list blog posts (many by yours truly) that it seems by admitting you ... More >>

Game Time: LeBron James: The Decision -- You Suck, ESPN

LeBron is Cleveland's new "Cuyahoga River on fire"​"It's been a real humbling experience to be in this position." -- LeBron James on his self-requested, one hour made-for-LeBron TV special on ESPNIf you lived in Houston at the time, you remember September 13, 2008. That was the morning after Hurr ... More >>

Game Time: NBA Free Agency -- So Is Dwyane Wade Gonna Hold It For You While You Pee Too, LeBron?

A Vogue cover, but no ring​Nothing worth chasing in life comes easy, so to say that by pooling their collective talents together to try and chase an NBA title in Miami that LeBron James, Chris Bosh, and Dwyane Wade are taking the "easy way out" isn't entirely fair.Actually, to be fair, with a ring ... More >>

Y'all Musta Forgot: Lil' Flip's The Leprechaun (And That Awful Cover)

Houston's history is dotted with albums that, fairly or un, have been swept aside. We'll examine them here. Have an album that you think nobody knows about but should? Email sheaserrano@gmail.com. Lil' Flip The Leprechaun (Sucka Free Records, 2000) ​Ah, Flipperace. Most people don't remember this ... More >>

The Top Ten Rockets Moments Of The Decade, For Better Or Worse

Photo by Daniel Kramer​For the Rockets, the decade of the 2000s began with Hall of Fame legend Hakeem Olajuwon starting at center. It finished with 6-foot-6 Chuck Hayes, the shortest listed starting center in NBA history.It started with promising rookie sensation and No. 2 pick Steve Francis at po ... More >>

Game Time: Woke Up This Morning, Got Myself LeBron

​Those of you who listen to my show know that I am fond of placing the "occasional" friendly wager. While handicapping the day-to-day and week-to-week ebb and flow of a football, basketball, or (if you're really sick) baseball season can be enjoyable and, at times, lucrative (especially when betti ... More >>

Rap Vixen And Houston Radio Host Tangle To The Death

 Quick, who's Karinne Steffans?You're supposed to know that. At least, according to her you are.Steffans, massive internet research reveals, is a former model and moneymaker-shaker in videos who wrote a tell-all book about her high-flying life called Confessions of a Video Vixen. (Among the peo ... More >>

Five Spot: Lil Jared Is Doper Than Most Kid Rappers

Welcome back to Five Spot. Every Friday, we'll examine a recent bit of music news and list five reasons why it's either brilliant or dumb-assed. Send tips to introducingliston@gmail.com. As set forth in the official "Give Any Song From the Offspring of a Local Icon at Least Three Weeks of Listeni ... More >>

Whole Offense, Hole Defense: The Houston Rockets Preview

Five Spot: Ron Artest Is Not Too Busy to Be a Meh Rapper

Q&A with Daryl Morey: Down the Stretch They Come…

Top 10 Most Hated Rappers

Who made the shit list

Black Box Office

Je'Caryous Johnson brings movie and TV stars to Houston. And chances are, you've never heard of him — unless you're African-American

Dear Diary

Brick by Bricks

It's real estate versus real love in Shunya Theatre's new play

Yao More than Ever

The big guy in the middle can take charge of a movie, too

Songs of Planet Krypton

The Man of Steel's pop-culture appeal is inscribed in decades of lyrics

Step Right On Up

It's better to receive than to give

No Kids in the Hall

Don't let the cuteness fool you: Aisha Tyler's act is for adults

One Hundred Million Reasons to Go See Great White

"Once Bitten Twice Shy" ain't one of 'em

Tall Orders

Local tailor clothes the NBA

Girls with Balls

The UK's Bend It Like Beckham scores big

Sports Injera

The Queen of Sheba mixes Ethiopia with ESPN

Press Picks

The Playa

With partner/producer DJ Quik, Suga Free preaches Street Gospel

Rotation

Beat the Heat!

1996 Summer Guide