Steven Tyler

Drenched In Blog: Mental Death

Last Night: Van Halen at Toyota Center

Aftermath: Metallica at Toyota Center

Photos by Craig Hlavaty / Click here for more Fandom is a funny thing. It can make the stodgiest businessman a KISS makeup wearing teenager from 1975. It can turn your Mom into a wannabe groupie when she gets a little too close to Steven Tyler. You yourself may wake up one tragic morn and grasp th ... More >>

Classic Rock Corner: The Greatest Band Logos of All Time, Part 1

Daniel Kramer With our ears still ringing from last night's AC/DC concert at Toyota Center (I knew we should have stayed away from the end of the stage with the cannon...), we got to thinking about the Aussie boys' iconic band logo. Sketched in pen on a million different school notebooks, and gr ... More >>

Live Shots

Daniel Kramer With our ears still ringing from last night's AC/DC concert at Toyota Center (I knew we should have stayed away from the end of the stage with the cannon...), we got to thinking about the Aussie boys' iconic band logo. Sketched in pen on a million different school notebooks, and gr ... More >>

The Future of Rock and Roll

We've seen it in a crystal ball and the pictures aren't pretty

Steven's Lament

We've seen it in a crystal ball and the pictures aren't pretty

Static

We've seen it in a crystal ball and the pictures aren't pretty

ZZ Top, Aerosmith Hit Woodlands July 17

Mark C. AustinMonday morning, word came down from Aerosmith and ZZ Top's respective camps, via Billboard, that the two boogie-rocking bands are teaming up for a massive world tour. After some digging, Rocks Off found out the tour makes its Houston-area stop Friday, July 17, at the Cynthia Wood ... More >>

Kimberlie Dykeman

The author of Pure Soapbox comes clean

Santana

All That I Am

Rock Floozies Write

Wack peruses some doozies in the groupie tell-all canon

Time Warp

Four bands bring the '70s back to town

Idol Beat: The Top Four

Photos by Ray Mickshaw/ FoxMan alive! Jamie Foxx mentored last week, and now guitarist-celeb Slash is in the proverbial American Idol house for "Rock and Roll Week"! Okay, sure, these people have projects and albums to promote, but these still feel like coups. Lot to address, so today I'm skipping t ... More >>

Do You Look Like Aerosmith's Steven Tyler or One of ZZ Top?

Live Nation has come through with a four-pack of lawn tickets to the classic-rock show of the summer, Aerosmith and Houston's own ZZ Top July 18 at the Cynthia Woods Mitchell Pavilion, and Rocks Off sure as hell ain't gonna give this away for some cheap-ass trivia question. Naw, this time we're gonn ... More >>

Bayou Beat: Live Nation Goes All In, ZZ Top Tickets Up for Grabs, Meridian Rocks the Sabbath and More

Courtesy of Stephen "Rube" Sager Live Nation has outdone itself on its latest "No Service Fee" Wednesday. All day, $29.99 buys a lawn ticket - one lawn ticket, mind you - parking, all those pesky fees, a hot dog and a soda for any participating show at the Cynthia Woods Mitchell Pavilion. Once they ... More >>

Last Call for ZZ Top/Aerosmith Lookalike Contest

Courtesy Tom Degler Rocks Off is a little disappointed we haven't gotten more response to our call for ZZ Top and Steven Tyler lookalikes - we are giving away a four-pack of lawn tickets to Friday's ZZ/Aerosmith show, after all. Yes, it's a little hot for all that facial hair, but we're fairly sure ... More >>

Aftermath: ZZ Top and Aerosmith at Cynthia Woods Mitchell Pavilion

Photos by Mark C. Austin Make all the Guitar Hero jokes you want. Whatever it is that's kept ZZ Top and Aerosmith in the public eye for almost four decades - video games or beards-n-babes videos, Back to the Future cameos or Michael Bay ballads, bee-stung lips or cheap sunglasses - they've never for ... More >>

Aftermath: Depeche Mode's Black and Blue Celebration at The Woodlands

Photos by Eric Sauseda​ Far, far away from the group once known for bubbly synth-pop anthems like "Just Can't Get Enough" and "Everything Counts," Depeche Mode circa 2009 has pressed its small army of keyboards and electronics into the service of primal urges and raw sexuality. Not terribly surpri ... More >>

Pink Floyd, Dr. Dre, Velvet Underground and Other Artists We're Glad Discovered Drugs

It was 45 years ago this past Friday... that Bob Dylan met the Beatles for the first time and, more importantly for Rocks Off's purposes, introduced them to marijuana. While this meeting of musical titans would never lead to any actual musical collaboration or "Monsters of Hippie Rock" series of co ... More >>

Five Possible Replacements for Steven Tyler In Aerosmith, Including Morrissey

www.irancartoon.ir​The remaining members of Aerosmith yesterday confirmed the news that singer Steven Tyler has left the band, and that they are currently looking for a replacement while Steven pursues glory with "Brand Tyler," whatever the hell that is. Thought Rocks Off has a hard time imagining ... More >>

Mid-Week Match-Up: Communication Breakdown, It's Always The Same

Two key players of two teams decided to break important news in odd ways this week.Steven Tyler, aging frontman for Aerosmith, dropped word that he was quitting the band (maybe; no one's clear) not by calling his bandmates, but by mentioning it to a British interviewer.Tracy McGrady, aging forward f ... More >>

The 11 Stupidest Events from the World of Music, 2009 Edition

Hi there, 2009. Please have a seat. Are you comfortable? Would you like some coffee, or perhaps a cigarette? No? Okay, good. Let's just cut straight to the point, then. You suck, and frankly we're sick of your bullshit. You were an awful year, filled not just with economic collapse, scary right-wi ... More >>

What Can Lady Gaga, Lil Wayne And Other Stars Claim On Their Taxes?

Photo illustrations by John Seaborn Gray​ Got your taxes done? No? You poor dumb bastard. They won't let you just not do them, you know that, right? Unpleasant as it is, finding out you owe still more money after having paid a sales tax all year, it's nothing compared to what the government will d ... More >>

Whoa! 21 Famous Musicians' High-School Yearbook Photos

Willie Nelson, the LAST time he had his hair short.​While Rocks Off was seeking out the best rock star yearbook photos for this blog, we came to a conclusion: Everyone was ugly in their yearbook photos, except Gwen Stefani and Beyonce Knowles. Everyone else looks weird as hell, or nothing like the ... More >>

The Internet's Freakiest Fan-Drawn Musical Art

Lady Gaga​Rocks Off scoured the Interwebs for at least an hour Thursday looking for the worst musical fan art we could find. Aside from being mildly sidetracked by pictures of Katy Perry and Britney Spears, we also found plenty of ghastly fan-made visages of their favorite rock and pop stars. ... More >>

Last Night: Aerosmith At Cynthia Woods Mitchell Pavilion

Ed. note: See a slideshow from Thursday night's concert with Aerosmith and Sammy Hagar here. Photos by Groovehouse​Aerosmith Cynthia Woods Mitchell Pavilion August 5, 2010 Remember when you were little and would watch your parents fight around the house? Everyone can relate, unless you grew ... More >>

Top 10 Rock Tell-All Autobiographies

​Craig's Hlist just cracked into his copy of Life, by Keith Richards. It's the first time that the Rolling Stones guitarist and god among men has taken time to document his rock and roll journey for anyone. Sure there have been Stones oral histories from the band, but this is Richards' chance ... More >>

10 Music Stories We Wish We'd Ignored This Year

​We in the alternative media - not necessarily the Houston Press and/or Rocks Off, not all the time - enjoy calling out our mainstream brethren. Whether it's ten books that didn't make The New York Times' "Best of 2010" list, or "10 Stories Our Print Version Accidentally Overlooked," us "under ... More >>

Idol Beat: Here We Go Again...

​Finally, after months of anticipation (or dread, depending on your pain tolerance), the new and *cough* "improved" American Idol made its debut. At long last we can start to put an end to the speculation about the show's 10th season: will Jennifer Lopez out-diva Ryan Seacrest? Can the show su ... More >>

Idol Beat: "Home Of Pirates, Drunks And Whores..."

​If you want to go to hell, you should take a trip To the Sodom and Gomorrah on the Mississipp. -- The Simpsons I kid. I mean, I haven't always been the biggest fan of the Big Easy, but that's mostly because I used to routinely leave a third of my brain cells and most of the contents of my di ... More >>

Idol Beat: Schlemiel. Schlimazel.

​So it seems the only difference between the two-hour Wednesday Idols and their one hour counterparts on Thursdays is twice as many "wacky" interludes (über Green Bay Packer fan Megan Frazier is going to make one lucky man...really miserable someday) and a third more shots of Steven Tyler wal ... More >>

Idol Beat: Viva Nash Vegas

​I was randomly scrolling back through past Idol Beats last night, doing my best to ignore mentally unbalanced dental hygienist Christine McCaffrey's butchering of "I Hope You Dance," when I realized something. The American Idol beat for Rocks Off is basically the Defense Against the Dark Arts ... More >>

Idol Beat: Austin, So Much To Answer For

​Rocks Off would like to apologize for last week's outrageous behavior by Pete Vonder Haar. He has been warned, and assures us he will never compare Marc Anthony to an extra from Dawn of the Dead again. Steven Tyler dropped an F-bomb on this week's audition episode, which definitely warrants ... More >>

Idol Beat: If You're Going To San Francisco, Try Not To Be A Beardo In A Sports Coat

​The surest way to piss off Steven Tyler - apart from being Joe Perry - is to butcher a Beatles song, which is the sin Dave Combs committed last night. But let's be honest, he didn't do *that* horrible a job. The former(?) Aerosmith front man is just a lot more forgiving if you profess your l ... More >>

Idol Beat: I'm About To Have A Nervous Breakdown

​My head really hurts...sorry, after last night's shenanigans, I couldn't help breaking out the Black Flag. Have you ever had one of those really bad nightmares, the kind that is so horrifying it wakes you up multiple times during the night? And even though your subconscious is trying to offe ... More >>

Idol Beat: Some Girls

​I missed most of last night's introduction because I was still trying to get my head around how they're going to milk tonight's selection show for two freaking hours. American Idol is just another example of domestic ineffeciency: take what should be -- at best -- a thirty minute program and ... More >>

Idol Beat: Brought To You By The Church Of Scientology

​I thought I imagined it at first, or was suffering the onset of hallucinations brought upon by sleep deprivation, strong drink, and three consecutive nights of watching Steven Tyler undress the audience with his eyes. But for maybe the first time since Season 10 of Idol began, I actually rewo ... More >>

Idol Beat: Mass Hysteria!

​Shock! Outrage! Shenanigans! Casey Abrams voted off! Last night, American Idol had all the signs of the Apocalypse rolled into one (all the Ghostbusters ones, anyway). Dogs and cats living together? Well, James Durbin is like a big puppy dog, and Pia has a certain cattiness about her. Check. ... More >>

Idol Beat: Democracy Doesn't Work

So, professor: would you say it's time for everyone to panic?​Well, I feel like an idiot. Flush with victory over my (sole) successful pick of the season in (finally) getting Jacob's booting correct, I was confident that James Durbin had the right combination of talent and appeal to the ladie ... More >>

14 Things You Didn't Know About Rick Springfield

2. Rick Springfield is a stone cold sex fiend... ​In recent years, many musicians have put down their instruments (at least temporarily) and picked up the computer keyboard to produce some pretty revelatory memoirs. And in one case, perhaps too revelatory - Billy Joel recently pulled the plug ... More >>

Idol Beat: The Beginning Of The End

Billboard.com/Fox"Are these two really the best from this season?"​7:07 p.m.: Okay, so the sir who typically writes this column - Pete Vonder Haar, or, as he's also referred to: the Television Demigod - has a bit of personal business to tend to, so we're stepping in for him. I have seen exactl ... More >>

Idol Beat: American Idiots

Spoiler alert: the smug one wins.​Thanks to Shea Serrano for taking the bullet yesterday. After what felt like eons, the 10th season of American Idol lurched to its inevitable anticlimax last night. It was as especially torturous affair, stretching well over two hours and mixing performances ... More >>

Ryan Seacrest Begets a Music Festival... And The Apocalypse

Mason Lankford said, "There will come a day when we forget the Rapture ever even happened," but Rocks Off is keeping an eye out for signs of our impending Armageddon. We were wrong last time, but we're totally right this time! Jyle Dupuis​Ryan Seacrest is a towering figure in the entertainmen ... More >>

Frances Bean Cobain's Sexy Shoot Reminds Us, Once Again, That We Are Old

Photos from hedislimane.com unless otherwise indicatedLittle Frances Bean, all grown up, tatted-up, and smoking cigarettes.​There's a line from Knocked Up I think of often these days, when the doorman of a swanky nightclub tells big sister Debbie, "I can't let you in 'cause you're old as fuck. ... More >>

New ZZ Top Tribute Disc Frightens, Titillates, And Confuses Us

Photo By Jim Bricker​If you don't know that Rocks Off is a ZZ Top-friendly place, then you have probably only been reading the blog for the past two or three hours. The two men who run this blog love Billy, Frank, and Dusty with the energy from one thousands suns, and their whole catalog runs ... More >>

Not Average Joe: Six Rock and Roll Joes on the Day "Hey Joe" Turns 45

​Despite the fact that he never really had a major "hit" (Electric Ladyland reached number one as an album but he never had a single go higher than 20 in the US) and was terribly under appreciated while he was still alive, Jimi Hendrix is one of the giants of rock and roll. His songs and his g ... More >>

Steven Tyler's National Anthem: Not Enough Zoobie-Dee-Dah Or Zippa-Doobie-Sha-Bop?

​I have now watched Steven Tyler's rendition of the National Anthem, that he performed before yesterday's big New England Patriots and Baltimore Ravens championship game, about five times straight. I enjoyed it, because it's Steven Tyler and Steven Tyler is crazy as shit. Just read his recent ... More >>

Patriots Seal AFC Title with a Kiss (w/ AWKWARD Video)

Bal'mer is gonna be tough on Billy Cundiff. Indeed.​The Patriots and the Ravens played a classic AFC championship game yesterday that featured various twists and turns, including a couple of bizarre brain cramps from Pats quarterback Tom Brady, a "turn back the clock" performance by the hefty ... More >>