U.S. Congress

Rick Perry: Mum's The Word

Rick Perry has adopted a more behind-the-scenes approach this time around. That doesn't mean he hasn't been busy.

State Rep Wants to Force Universities to Allow Faculty to Research Intelligent Design, Thousand-Head Giants, and Earth-Creating Ravens

The current legislative session has been, as far as we can tell at Hair Balls, a series of marginal victories for the state's education system. The voucher system State Sen. Dan Patrick attempted to instill -- the same kind that's beset Georgia in corrupt conflicts; the same sort that's hollowed Lou ... More >>

Are You There, Senate? It's Me, the National Rifle Association's Legislative Dude

Figuring that the pen is mightier than the, uh, firearm, the National Rifle Association's legislative director has sent an open letter to the U.S. Senate, stating the association's stance against a Senate bill that would regulate private gun transfers and expand background checks. Senate Bill 649, ... More >>

Rick Perry Has Message For Schools: Tea Party Favorite Michael WIlliams To Head TEA

Governor Rick Perry didn't go safe and sound when picking a new commissioner of the Texas Education Agency -- instead he's installed bomb-throwing Tea Party favorite Michael Williams. The former Railroad Commission chair has been nosing around a few political options in the past couple of years -- ... More >>

Ted Cruz Is Here to Protect Texas from the UN

Texas Republican voters finally jumped to their senses Tuesday and followed the clarion call of Sarah Palin by electing Ted Cruz to the U.S. Senate over pallid insider David Dewhurst. The upset was the latest bit of rebellion from the Tea Party, adding to the footnotes that will be written in poli ... More >>

GOP Senate Candidate Ted Cruz, In Fact, Rich As Sh*t

Last week, after it came out that Texas Lt. Gov. David Dewhurst is worth an astonishing $177 million and would become the third-richest member of the U.S. Senate if elected to a body that has at least 54 millionaires, there was one word local media employed to describe his competitor Ted Cruz's fina ... More >>

Parental Advisory! Another Look at the PMRC's "Dirty 15"

In 1985, the Parental Music Resource Center was formed as basically a watchdog group over popular music. Essentially, their goal was censorship. However, there was one big problem: The group was made up of the likes of Tipper Gore (wife of then-Senator and future Vice President Al Gore), Susan Bake ... More >>

Presidents' Sons at War: 13 Service Records, from the Mediocre to the Ultimate Sacrifice

Being the parent of someone fighting in a war is no picnic, even if you're a president. In the modern era, several future or incumbent presidents had sons in the military in wartime. Some of those sons did much, some very little, one paid the ultimate price. Let's look, building up to that ultimat ... More >>

The Delicious Madness Of Ted Cruz's GOP Senate Campaign Ads

All of Texas is feeling the excitement of the GOP primary for the U.S. Senate. It's really all that Texans are talking about, apart from everything and anything else. Lt. Governor David Dewhurst, a bland and boring pol, is facing Ted Cruz, a Tea Partier who has been endorsed by Sarah Palin. (The Te ... More >>

Cornbreadd Goes To Washington: Maurice Duhon Talks U.S. House Campaign

Cornbreadd - make that Maurice Duhon Jr. - is, to use a term of the trade, good copy. He's articulate, opinionated and effervescent, a tireless self-promoter with a genuine concern for and interest in the welfare of others - first his fans as the rapping front man of Houston Press Music Award winne ... More >>

7 Little-Known (And Completely Unverified) Facts About U.S. Presidents

Today, the nation celebrates Presidents' Day, the most important holiday of all time. No other national holiday has such a clear purpose or overall popularity. Therefore, why not recognize this momentous occasion with a look back at some of our greatest presidents, and learn some facets of their bio ... More >>

Hispanic Savior and a Donkey Devotee

Craig James for Senate: To Know Him Is to Not Like Him, Polls Say

A new poll for Texas's open U.S. Senate seat has bad news for Houston's Craig James, former SMU star and ESPN analyst. Most people don't know the guy. Those that do, don't like him. James had the biggest gap between "favorable" and "unfavorable" ratings, a whopping 15 percent. Two-thirds of those ... More >>

Why We Love to Hate the Texas Alcoholic Beverage Control Commission

Image via Westerville Public Libary (Westerville, Ohio).To understand our state's peculiar relationship with alcohol, we need to look back to the early post-Prohibition era when the TABC was founded (1935).​In the wake of a recent post on the absurdity of wine shipping regulation in Texas, a c ... More >>

Lost Boys: Senate Bill 596

Village Voice Media asks for your support

Funny HPMA Nomination Ballot Fails

​It does Rocks Off's heart good to see that our Music Award nominations have stirred up so much debate. As we mentioned Tuesday, according to our Web people, there were some 9,000 nominations submitted across our 43 categories. Of course there's no way for us to really know, but as far as we ... More >>

8 Memories from Congressional Page Land: Sandwiches with the Speaker, Shaking Bill Clinton's Hand and Stealing KFC Decals

Qui-Gon in your room?​Today, it was announced that the House of Representatives Page Program, a program both steeped in history and marred by scandal, is coming to an end. According to USA Today, House Speaker John Boehner and Minority Leader Nancy Pelosi cited the $5 million annual expenditu ... More >>

It's Pi Day, Pi Day, Gotta Get Down on Pi Day

​In keeping with Rocks Off's latest obsession, compiling soundtracks for oddball holidays, we were tickled pink as a chorus girl's nipple to learn that this Friday is Pi Approximation Day. The holiday was first in 1988 by a physicist named Larry Shaw, who made everyone march in a circle then ... More >>

Dan Patrick Says He's Polling Great For U.S. Senator

Dan Patrick inches closer to US Senate race​Tomball's favorite state senator, Dan Patrick (R-Tea Party), has weighed in on the polling landscape for his possible run for the United States Senate. And he likes what he sees. Patrick says the recent Texas Lyceum poll (the one that showed Presid ... More >>

10 Politician Photos Sexier Than Anthony Weiner's Shots (NSFW)

If you've ever had any curiosity about how photogenic Anthony Weiner's crotch is, you're having a great week or so. (The answer, by the way, is "Not one-on hundredth as photogenic as he seems to think it is.") Weiner, who's taken a leave of absence from the U.S. House of Representatives to deal wit ... More >>

Inmates Diss Web Dating

Thank You, Lord: Dan Patrick May Run for Senate

God is on line two, with a campaign contribution.​If you take as a given -- which you should -- that it's going to be awhile before a moderate ever gets elected to the U.S. Senate from Texas, then you want your troglodyte senatorial candidates to be as entertainingly fringe as possible. So lo ... More >>

Legislature Makes Western Swing Official Texas Music

News Flash: Hank Williams still not a Texan nodepression.comBob "Willis" & His Texas Playboys​It appears Rocks Off's efforts of a few weeks ago were all for naught. Despite presenting what we thought was a fairly persuasive San Jacinto Day argument to the contrary, earlier today the Texas L ... More >>

Legislative Victory for Texas Beer

kMatherlyCheers indeed. Local breweries celebrate a win in the House of Representatives.Just as we were bemoaning the huge, wet bite the IRS took out of our savings account, along comes an example of tax dollars being put to good use. On April 21 the office of State Representative Jessica Farrar (D, ... More >>

Scott Hochberg: Politically Extinct Due To Redistricting?

Scott Hochberg has a target on his back​A marathon session in the state House of Representatives has produced a proposed redistricting map, and it's bad news for two Houston Democrats: Scott Hochberg and Hubert Vo. Houston loses one district under the map, and in the game of musical chairs, i ... More >>

Sheila Jackson Lee in the Muslim Hearings: YouTube Hit

The U.S. House's bizarre hearings on Muslims (sorry, "radical" Muslims) included a noteworthy speech by Rep. Keith Ellison, the only Muslim member of Congress, who teared up while remembering a Muslim first responder who died on 9/11. And then there was Sheila Jackson Lee. Love her or hate her, she ... More >>

Lack Of Social Safety Net Tying Many Musicians To Day Jobs

"I fantasize sometimes that my musical career would hit gold and help us escape these grim realities, but it's not something I really expect to happen." ​There are few issues in the current political climate more fraught with contention than whether or not the U.S. government will take a more ... More >>

Tom DeLay Gets Jail Time

The Hammer gets the slammer​Tom DeLay's sentence has been handed out, and it's not a slap on the wrist: He's going to prison for three years with no probation on the conspiracy charges. DeLay was also sentenced by judge Pat Priest to 10 years' probation on a money-laundering charge, according ... More >>

What To Do When The Crowd Yells "Free Bird!"

​Sooooooo.... Thursday, the U.S. Constitution was read aloud on the floor of the House of Representatives, an act that Rocks Off views as the government equivalent of doing your homework on the morning bus, but whatever. Just as Rep. Frank Pallone, D-N.J. was reading the bit about the eligibi ... More >>

"Auld Lang Syne," In All Its Many Colors

​Harry: What does this song mean? My whole life, I don't know what this song means. "Should old acquaintance be forgot" - does that mean we should forget old acquaintances, or if we happen to forget them, that we should remember them, which is not possible because we've already forgotten them? ... More >>

Return to Sender

What Would Comprehensive Immigration Reform Look Like If the Feds Got Off Their Duffs?

Just What America Needs: Four More Texas Votes In The U.S. House Of Representatives

Texas is a big winner​Republicans in the Texas Legislature have already been salivating over the opportunity to redraw Congressional districts with little to no interference from those annoying Democrats. The U.S. Census just handed them another gift: Four more seats to mess with. A 20 perce ... More >>

What's So Damn Controversial About Cleaner, Safer Food?

​The plant was filthy and infested with vermin, with holes as large as 2 ½ feet in the ceilings leaking water and runoff from the air conditioner units onto the finished product stored below. Records posted on the web by attorney Bill Marler show that executives at Peanut Corporation of Ameri ... More >>

FAIR-y Tales: Mexican Macro-economics

Voodoo Lady: Christine O'Donnell's Halloween Playlist

​Christine O'Donnell's "I Am Not a Witch" ad gave us truckloads of comedy during a rather boring election season. Thanks to that unintentionally hilarious ad and the upcoming election, Christine has been on our minds lately. To better understand what drives the Teabag candidate, we stole her ... More >>

Sheila Jackson Lee Fares Badly, As Usual, On "Best & Worst Of Congress" List

Sheila Jackson Lee: You call the woman who honored MIchael Jackson a "Show Horse"?​Wanna know the inside skinny on your U.S. Congress members?Every election year, Washingtonian magazine gets Capitol Hill staffers to dish on their bosses and rank them from best to worst. And as you might expect, r ... More >>

Beauty School Dropouts

HISD might close cosmetology program.

Clever retorts and unloved yaktivists

Built to Last

Iron Man 2 will lead to 3 and probably 4, but that doesn't mean it's good.

They Were Kinky Before Kinky Was Kinky: Musicians Who Have Held Public Office

From Ted Nugent to Bruce Springsteen to those adorable Dixie Chicks, "Masters of War" to "George Bush doesn't care about black people," musicians have never been shy about voicing their political opinions. But when it comes to putting their money where their mouths are and filing the necessary pape ... More >>

Teen Porn 101

If they're taking their laptops and cell phones to bed with them, it's probably not to do homework.

Turkeys of the Year

In a highly competitive 2009 field, Governor Rick Perry is the biggest gobbler of them all.

Bill White Switching To The Governor's Race, Chron Reporting

​The Houston Chronicle is reporting that Mayor Bill White is about to switch his future plans from not being elected to the U.S. Senate to not being elected Texas governor.White's move comes as Senator Kay Bailey Hutchison's laughably inept run for the governorship continues to implode. Sooner or ... More >>

The Tug of War

Rick Perry and Kay Bailey Hutchison are locked in a pitched battle over the soul of the GOP. They are also running for governor.

The Candidate Conspiracy author John Odam

This Texas lawyer/novelist uses experience in campaign finance to keep you on the edge of your reading glasse

Get Your Free Election Day Stuff (And Maybe Break the Law)

Mint Condition

Thanks to a Slick Move, Houston-based Weatherford Keeps Drilling in Sudan

Hell to the Chief!

Blue Christmas

Joe's Roadhouse pays homage to the melancholy side of the season