U.S. Secret Service

Texas Activist Chains Neck to White House Fence (German Bike Locks Rock)

If you've never heard of Diane Wilson, you've probably heard about the environmentalist who poured Karo syrup on herself on the steps of the Capitol Building in Washington D.C. to protest the BP oil spill. (That was Wilson.) Or about the one who chained herself to the Dow Chemical tower in 2002, se ... More >>

George W. Bush: Soapy, Hot Nude Shower Pics RIGHT HERE!!

Let's face it -- throughout the long presidency of George W. Bush, with all the fake wars, the lack of effort to get Bin Laden, the Gilded Age treatment of the richest one percent and Wall Street, you struggled with one thing: Where were the nude shots? Unfortunately, no paparazzi has been able to ... More >>

A Gallery Of U.S. Presidents Working On Their Fitness

I don't know about you guys, but when I looked at the crop of Republican presidential candidates about a year ago, as the media and primary wars waged on, I could only think about what they would look like jogging or working out. It's a hidden hot-button issue. Depraved, mindless people like me vote ... More >>

Obama Mural Defaced Once Again, But You Cannot Kill It

Uh-oh, did we just put "Obama" and "kill" in the same line? We'll expect our Secret Service call any day now. The Breakfast Klub's eye-catching Obama mural by Reginald Adams, which has been attracting attention at Alabama and Travis since 2008, has been defaced yet again. It should be used to such ... More >>

IRS Pain for Brown Aide

William Park: Helena Brown's Volunteer "Senior Adviser" Owes IRS $339,000

City Council Member Helena Brown's volunteer "senior adviser" William Park, who was barred from the investment industry last year and has come under criticism for his apparent influence over the councilwoman, owes the Internal Revenue Service $339,160 in federal liens, raising significant ethical co ... More >>

Jerry "The King" Lawler Piledrives Clipper Fan: Old School WWE Wrestlers for Each NBA Playoff Series (w/ VIDEO)

People laugh dismissively when I say it, but the more they can incorporate WWE performers and the general WWE "way" of entertainment, the more enjoyable other genres of sports will become. No, I'm not talking about the predetermined outcomes of matches (The NBA has already incorporated that aspect o ... More >>

Harry Truman and Bess: Another E-mail from Your Dad

Like most of you, I get e-mails from my dad full of "facts" that are basically telling me how much better life was in the past than it is now. People were more respectful, politicians were more honest, and values were more...valued? Case in point, yesterday I received a list of trivia about Harry ... More >>

JotForm.com Takedown: No Court Order? Apparently, No Problem

Imagine for a moment you own a business and are being investigated for a crime. You come to work and your offices are shut down and your phones turned off by your building's management at the request of the government. Now, take it a step further and imagine that you weren't the one being investiga ... More >>

Synaca Thomas and Brittany Jordan: Couple Take $5 Bills and Turn Them into a Half-Million Worth of $100 Bills

Could that be a $5 bill?​A husband-wife team has been indicted for counterfeiting after allegedly spending up to $500,000 in fake $100 bills that started out as $5 bills. Synaca Thomas, 34, and his wife Brittany Jordan, 25, of Cypress, passed the bills at Houston-area businesses for two years ... More >>

Upcoming Events

Photo by Katharine ShilcuttYou can even pose outside a mockup of Air Force One with a Secret Service dummy at the TAFR cookoff.​Last year, the Texas Association of First Responders (TAFR) Wild Game Cookoff at Sam Houston Race Park was by far the best barbecue cookoff I attended all year. With ... More >>

The Five Dark Secrets America's First Ladies Wanted Desperately to Keep Private

Let me tell you what my astrologer said, Warren​The position of First Lady is often a thankless one. A surprising number of presidential wives, usually citing health, were all but recluses during their husband's administration, brooding out of sight like something out of Jane Eyre. Others hav ... More >>

The Five Hottest Presidential Daughters

Continuing on with our C-SPANish investigation into White House sex and beauty (five horniest presidents here, five hottest presidential mistresses here), we now take time to examine the five hottest presidential daughters. Once again, time has not been kind to pre-20th Century candidates. Either p ... More >>

George W. Bush's Fifth Ward River Oaks Book-Signing Sold Out

George W. Bush: Ask him about his belt​Currently unemployed former Houstonian George W. Bush will be in town this week to sign copies of his book, offering customers a rare chance to pay full price for Decision Points before it hits the cutout bins. He's appearing in an obscure, out-of-the-wa ... More >>

Rappers Vs. Uncle Sam: N.W.A., Eminem, Kanye...

​Mike Myers will probably go down in history as the most uncomfortable white guy next to a black guy in TV history, thanks to Kanye West's unscripted outburst during that infamous Hurricane Katrina telethon. It began with Myers reading his part of the script verbatim. Two-thirds into the PSA, ... More >>

Obama & JFK: Five Ominous Parallels Someone's Aware Of, Right?

The Secret Service is on the case, we hope​As the dog days descend upon us, the mind starts to wander.It may wander so much that it occasionally turns into Fox News, although this is not recommended. Same with trolling though right-wing blogs.It's a scary world out there, folks. And it brings to m ... More >>

Obama Assassination: It's Not Just For Geometry Anymore!

Official White House photoObama, we hardly knew ye, but your death will help us teach geometry​A teacher in Alabama has been placed on leave after he used a hypothetical assassination of President Obama to teach his geometry class about angles.On the one hand, the guy's just trying to get his kids ... More >>

Silence Of The Hams

Photos by Katharine ShilcuttThis was a pig at one time.​Sad to report that I'm not clever enough to have come up with that little pun on my own (or even, "It puts the BBQ sauce on its skin, or else it gets the hose again!" - a friend came up with that gem shortly afterwards). No, the credit fo ... More >>

Facebook Poll Says Killing Obama Isn't Okay

​Cyber stalkers, prolific e-haters, overzealous blog followers, Facebook poll developers and authors. Fine, fine company indeed, wouldn't you agree? But more notably, what do they all have in common? They're all enough to put a seriously debilitating quiver in your nether regions, and no, not the ... More >>

Spy Story

Con man or super spook — either way, Roland Carnaby wasn't supposed to meet his death on a Houston highway in a high-speed chase with the cops.

25 More Random Facts About the Houston Livestock Show & Rodeo

Photo by JaseMan Okay Mr. Connelly, I read your post from yesterday about the "25 Random Facts About the Houston Livestock Show & Rodeo." So I consider myself tagged, and will now do my 25 Random Facts About the Rodeo, derived from the way too many years I worked that damn thing as part of the in- ... More >>

25 More Random Facts About the Houston Livestock Show & Rodeo

Photo by JaseMan Okay Mr. Connelly, I read your post from yesterday about the "25 Random Facts About the Houston Livestock Show & Rodeo." So I consider myself tagged, and will now do my 25 Random Facts About the Rodeo, derived from the way too many years I worked that damn thing as part of the in- ... More >>

The Likely Conspiracies Behind The Katy ISD Counterfeit Ring

Various news outlets reported Wednesday that the Katy Independent School District received 10 reports of counterfeit bills passed in school cafeterias in the past couple of months. These include several high schools and an elementary school.Steve Stanford, district spokesperson for KISD, tells Hair ... More >>

The Bush Twins' Real Letter to the Obama Girls

Did you hear how the Bush twins, Jenna and Barbara, recently sent an open letter to the Obama girls, offering up advice for surviving life in The White House? Now, to be honest, I thought their original letter was a truly sweet and lovely gesture, and I actually think the Bush twins have turned ... More >>

Living In W's Hood

  Josh Harkinson used to write for us here at the Houston Press before he decided that living in San Francisco was somehow a lifestyle upgrade.Now he writes for Mother Jones, continuing his stellar career of raking muck.It turns out that Harkinson grew up just six blocks from where George ... More >>

Is Obama's New Family Dog Coming From Houston?

The saga of the Obama family dog has made the entire nation forget the fact that they soon will be out of jobs, to a degree.The new first family is committed to adopting a rescued dog; an Obama daughter has allergy problems so the process of choosing a pet has become complicated.Now comes word that ... More >>

Five Other Rock-Star Presidents

Bold New immigration Plan -- Give Yourself Up

Elizabeth Edwards

The politician’s wife discusses her life — the good and the bad

Multi-Perspective, Mega-Annoying Vantage Point

The Truth Won't Set You Free

Drenched In Blog: Being Thankful for JFK Conspiracy Theories

Get Lit: The First Commandment, by Brad Thor

Back to Busch

The Astros' first five NLCS games, as they happened

Ropin' the Rat

The Houston Texans square off against the Broncos

Lost in Translation

All talk and little action, The Interpreter doesn't even make sense

Powers in the Attic

Take a walk through the psychedelic landscape of Symphony of Rats

Chasing Mandy

A pop-star-turned-actress tries to move into her "mature phase"

Electric Shtick

The Electric Six's shenanigans have them laughing all the way to the bank

Ms. Deal

When it comes to movies for Mandy, Moore isn't better

Laff Riot

Watch out -- it's Wacky Time at Houston's only daily

Quirky Yes, Al Qaeda No

Feds find weird art but not anthrax terrorists at the Art Car Museum

Seek Bomb Shelter

Director Rod Lurie's nuclear debate blows up in his face

News Hostage

The Insider

Power Outage

Eastwood crawls over the hill and into the sunset

The Insider

Letters

The Watchman of the Electronic Frontier

As the cyber-future creeps toward Houston, one group stands guard: EFH

Yucking It Up

Being There

An interview with JFK -- more or less