The 1970s gave us many wonderful things that are still culturally relevant to this day: Sesame Street, punk music, the Honda Civic and video games. However, it also marked a period in time where (much like the 1960s before it) food was marketed in perhaps the most unappealing ways possible.
Below are 10 of the strangest and most disturbing food ads from the 1970s, all of which were pulled from the Vintage Ad Browser. (Yes, it's a total timesuck.)
Yes; yes, they do. Unless those words are "hearts ripped from the bloody chests of wild yaks."
I was so excited for y'all to come over to the new double-wide, I done broke out two whole cans of them Vee-anny sausages!
Why...why are you looking at me like that, Uncle Jerry? Mom? Dad?!?
While the green can of "parmesan" "cheese" is sadly still omnipresent, you never hear anything about its lesser sibling, the grated "cheddar" in a can. Rumors hold that the powerful Kraft family had it lobotomized and sent to an institution.
Is there anything less appetizing than shoveling sauerkraut on top of a pizza? Yes, there is. The recipes on the bottom of the ad prove it.
Your mongrel dogs are already going to eat you when you die, you sad loner. Guess you're going to get them used to that idea early, huh?
You can tell Mom loves you when she sends you off with breakable glass objects in your flimsy lunchbox in the rain.
Ever wondered how to make a magical food like cheese into something completely vile and wretch-inducing? The 70s already took care of that for you, by placing it inside a sausage-casing-style tube.
Spackle-Ball! Now with olives!
Oddly enough, there's also a 70s sexploitation flick with the same name...