Troy Fields


I've always been more of a sot than a jock. I was a bit curious about the giant indoor soccer facility in my old neighborhood, but when someone told me it had a full bar inside, I had to check it out. Some Americans don't think soccer is a good spectator sport. If you're one of these people, you're doing it wrong. Take it from a lifetime spectator of most anything athletics-related: This sport, especially the six-on-six coed variety they play at Kicks Indoor Soccer & Gym (611 Shepherd Dr.; 713-426-1107), is fun to watch. Especially when the facility offers cocktails and loud music. Especially the coed part. My research assistant José showed up for duty straight from work wearing a suit and tie. He threatened to start pacing the sidelines cursing at the referee in Italian like a deranged manager for AC Milan. This idea had off-the-charts comedic potential. Unfortunately, José doesn't speak Italian. Or Spanish. Hell, last Saturday night he could barely speak English. After a few drinks, I caught myself doing terrible play-by-play commentary to nobody in particular. Clearly, I have issues.

1 ounce vodka

Splash green Gatorade

Splash Red Bull

Splash melon liqueur

Pour over ice. Stir and serve. Gooooooaaaaallll!!!


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