McDonald's convinced me to try their new Premium McWraps with their weird interactive Web site promotion. It seems as if a lot of time and effort went into constructing this animated cityscape, where you can "explore the world of the new Premium McWrap" and also click on some balloons to see them fly away!
Warning: Don't stay on the page for too long, as it (seriously) causes motion sickness.
Let's get right to the nitty gritty here -- there is nothing premium about the McDonald's Premium McWrap, beyond the sheer size of the thing. I picked up two of the three flavors -- Sweet Chili and Ranch (skipping the bacon) -- and couldn't decide which one I liked less. I ordered both with grilled, rather than crispy, chicken; crispy chicken would probably taste better, but I can't believe it would dramatically improve the overall experience.
Let's start with the Sweet Chili. Question: OH, HEY, WHERE'S THE CHILI? And also, the cucumber? And also, the "spring greens"? This wrap consisted of limp, shredded iceberg lettuce and processed chicken bites, all drenched in a sweet sauce that (I can only suspect) was supposed to mimic Asian flavors; the "creamy garlic sauce" was just mayonnaise that, as far as I could tell, contained no garlic flavor. The tortilla was limp and decidedly cold.
Next up, the Ranch Premium McWrap. The nightmare continues with this flaccid combination of sour ranch dressing, bland chicken and soggy vegetables (lettuce, tomato). Once again the cucumber was missing, but I'd argue this sandwich didn't really need more soggy veggies, so I didn't really miss them. McD's Web site says this wrap is topped with both rice vinegar and ranch, so I suspect that's where the sourness comes from -- it's not a pleasant flavor combination.
If McDonald's put half the effort into the ingredients that they did into the animated promotional page and the product packaging -- which unwraps halfway down the cardboard, giving anyone eating and driving a solid "handle" on their wrap -- Premium Wraps might not be the unmitigated disaster that they are.
Verdict: Quite possibly the worst thing I've eaten in 2013. So far.
Follow Eating Our Words on Facebook and on Twitter @EatingOurWords