To further educate our reading audience about important national issues like immigration, the economy and race relations, we have again asked guest columnist Conchita Maria Guadalupe Maria Hortencia Juanita Maria Garcia Gomez Gonzles de Smith to comment on Americaโ€™s need for an immigrant work force.

The United States would be a completely different country without Mexicans. (Please note, I use the word โ€œMexicansโ€ as a general term to mean everybody from Latin America who has come to the U.S. They arenโ€™t all Mexican, I know, but thatโ€™s how I do it. Mostly because almost nobody calls them โ€œwet backsโ€ in public anymore (shout out to Mac Haik!). Also because saying โ€œundocumented immigrants from Latin Americaโ€ is too long to say every time. And I canโ€™t call them โ€œundocumented workers,โ€ because some of them mofos ainโ€™t working.) Just to make sure you understand the full impact of Mexicans on our economy, Iโ€™ve listed the top five reasons you need Mexicans. Enjoy.

Reason Number Five: Without Mexicans, lettuce would cost $15 a head and grapes would be considered caviar.

Mexicans do most of the countryโ€™s farm work, and they do it for less than half of the usual salary. No, not the running a tractor or spraying insecticide work. Mexicans do all the jobs that require standing, bent over row of vegetables, in the hot, burning sun, for 14 hours a day, and they do it for about $2 an hour.

Reason Number Four: Without Mexicans, Rush Limbaugh and Glenn Beck would be out of a job.

What else do those two do but blame Mexicans for every problem in the U.S.? (Like we started a war in the Middle East or something. Please.)

Reason Number Three: Without Mexicans, you would have to take care of your own family.

You, yes, you, would have to take care of your own kids, clean your own house, mow your own lawn, and take care of your own elderly parents. Yeah, there are still a few decent daycares in the country, and yeah, you could get the kid down the block to mow your lawn, but who is going to wipe your dadโ€™s saggy huevos? Or your momโ€™s guachanga? Believe me, not you.

Reason Number Two: Without Mexicans, every Chinese restaurant would have to close due to lack of workers.

Every Chinese restaurant in town has Vietnamese waiters and Mexican kitchen staff. Who is washing the dishes? Not the Chinese restaurant owner who is flying back and forth from Hong Kong to smuggle over priceless Asian artifacts.

Reason Number One: Without Mexicans, the wall Republicans want to build across the U.S./Mexico border wouldnโ€™t get built.

Any construction job in the U.S. that pays less than $10 an hour, a Mexican is doing it. And for sure, all those billions of dollars the GOP is allocating for the wall ainโ€™t going to the construction; theyโ€™re going to phantom supply purchases and costly consultant fees.

Face it, you need us.

Face it, we know it.

Thank you for reading. – Conchita

Click here to see locations for tonightโ€™s screening of Border, a film by Chris Burgard.

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