I frequently write about music and my kids are in bands so I’m often asked if I have any musical talent and I’m always sad to report I do not. When the new year rolled onto the calendar a few months ago, I resolved this would be the year I did something about that. I’ve always wanted to play drums and we have a spare kit here in storage, so I set a goal to learn the instrument at least well enough to play Phil Collins’ “I Don’t Care Anymore” in its entirety by my birthday in July.
The problem is, I’ll be 61 on that birthday and lately I’ve been asking myself if I’m too old to successfully learn a musical instrument. That “old dogs, new tricks” thing keeps popping into my gray head. Annually, less than 30 percent of the world’s new music students are ages 20 and up. It seemed like I might have my work cut out for me.
I wanted to know more about my chances at successfully learning drums from people I knew would have some insight on whether it would be worth trying at all, this idea of learning an instrument – or anything new – late in life.
I reached out to Jason Allen, one of the busiest drummers in Houston. He’s been playing more than 40 years and if you asked anyone who knows him, they’d tell you he’s probably drumming for that many bands right now. He rattled off a list of 20 he’s played in since 2009, acts like Radio Flyer, Slummer, the Real McCoys, Party Mouth, the Dead Rabbits, Tekauche, deadhorse and many others. He said he has “a couple of new projects, one is a hip hop collaboration called Battle of Bigwig, featuring artists such as IAMLOPEZ, Rome and Guilla, to mention a few,” and several bands he performs with – Fostermother, TCHHT and Five Armed Swordsman, for instance – are releasing new music soon.
Like many musicians, Allen took up his instrument as a kid.
“I remember it like it was yesterday, when I would visit my father who had a drum set in his living room and I would just jam along to his records. Anything from ZZ Top to AC/DC to Steely Dan and whatever else I could find in his collection. Music has always been a part of my family history so I’m truly grateful to have an affinity for it. And, the rest is history.
“Anyone who is serious about learning the drums should definitely have access to a drum set, otherwise you’re limited to tapping on things with your hands, which can also be effective when it comes to rudiments. However, with a full kit at your disposal, it’s easier to develop the muscle memory required for limb independence,” he started. “I’d have to say the most difficult aspect of learning the drums is timing. Even advanced players who can play beats and fills extremely well struggle to play them consistently, but that’s the ongoing challenge we face. After all, a drummer’s first and foremost duty as a musician is to keep time for the band, the complicated stuff is pointless if you miss the one.”
Allen is a drum instructor when he’s not out playing gigs. He admits he doesn’t have any “official” adult students, the majority of his music students being pre-teens.
“But the principles remain the same regardless of age,” he assured. “Rhythm is key, some people feel it and some people just don’t.”
I’m sure I have rhythm but, listening to Allen, it occurred I’d need more than precise timing to be successful in this endeavor. I needed to know more about the learning process at my advanced age to gauge if I’d really have a shot at impressing my birthday party guests by banging out a Phil Collins classic.
Genesis Blu, MA, LPC, PhD (ABD), is a licensed professional counselor with 20 years’ work in the mental health field. She’s also someone I’ve been lucky to chat with periodically while covering music here. Besides her highly credentialed career as a counselor, therapist and life coach, she’s a rapper who has performed on some of Houston’s biggest stages.
“Currently, my work centers around helping high-achieving individuals—especially women—navigate anxiety, depression, relationship challenges and life transitions. A big focus of my work is helping people recognize when they’re over-functioning in their lives and relationships and guiding them toward healthier boundaries, self-trust and emotional balance.
“In addition to therapy, I also provide coaching for individuals who are looking to achieve personal and professional goals while creating more balance in their lives. That often includes helping people reconnect with themselves, explore new interests and give themselves permission to pursue things that bring them joy without focusing on productivity.”
Exploring new interests and pursuing things for the joy they bring seemed to be my reasons for trying drums, but I had some anxiety about it all. Blu could identify.
“From a personal perspective, this is something I’ve dealt with when I decided to re-enter the hip hop world. Hip hop is one of the only genres that believes there is a time limit on releasing music. Like most other people, the greatest obstacle is our thinking. The human mind is a powerful tool and it can be your greatest cheerleader or biggest hater. So, the “negative self talk” as we call it, may say ‘It’s too late, you’re too old, and no one will listen.’ This all just translates to a fear of failure but also sometimes the fear of success!
“On a deeper level, people often get attached to who they’ve always been or how others see them. Trying something new requires you to step outside of that identity, and that can feel uncomfortable or even unsafe,” she continued. “Societal standards or family expectations, for example, keep many of my clients from pursuing their actual passion and purpose.
“There’s also perfectionism, another thing I was guilty of. Many people feel like if they can’t do something well immediately, they shouldn’t do it at all. So, many of my clients get stuck in the process of thinking about the goal and never take action.”
Those thoughts can torpedo the best efforts at a new interest, she said. We overthink and never act. We make unfair comparisons to others “instead of allowing ourselves to be beginners,” which kills motivation, she said. We set unrealistic goals or overcommit and burn out. And then, we simply talk ourselves out of something we really wanted to try. So, how do we avoid these pitfalls?
“Begin with the end in mind. What is the true vision of what you want, and does it ultimately align with your bottom line?” she asked. “For example, if you want to start playing guitar, I would first ask you, ‘Why? What would this fulfill for you?’ And would learning to play just a simple tune soothe that desire, or do you dream of playing in front of a large audience?
“From there, I recommend starting small, taking the first step,” she said. “Give yourself permission to be a beginner without attaching your worth to your performance. You are allowed to learn without being exceptional right away. Also, pay attention to your internal dialogue. The way you speak to yourself will either support your growth or sabotage it. Challenge the thoughts that tell you to quit before you’ve even started. Make a list of five to 10 personal affirmations and recite them regularly.
“I also recommend utilizing your healthy support system to encourage you and hold you accountable. We tend to stick to things a little better when we know others are watching,” she said. “And most importantly, focus on alignment over approval. If something genuinely interests you or brings you joy, that’s enough of a reason to pursue it.”
Genesis Blu and Jason Allen are very good at what they do. They encouraged me to get back on my drum stool and go for it. If you’re interested specifically in drums, Allen books his lessons though Beautiful Minds Music.
“When you book a lesson from me through Beautiful Minds, I come to you. So, it’s really a win- win scenario because you don’t even have to leave your house to learn how to play the drums. And I can do 30-, 45- and 60-minute sessions, so however much time you’re willing to dedicate per week, month or quarter is how fast you’ll progress.”
He’s so interested in helping others learn, he even offered his personal email for anyone with questions – or, looking to hire him for his next band. The man is a machine!
Genesis Blu is also an author, whose latest book, The Month of Me, released earlier this year. She described it as “a 30-day guided self-love experience designed to help people reconnect with themselves in a real, practical way. It was created for individuals who are used to showing up for everyone else but struggle to prioritize their own needs.”
“A major theme throughout the book is learning how to stop over-functioning and start choosing yourself, without guilt. This includes always seeking joy by doing the things you love and make you happy without having to earn them! Sometimes we don’t pursue our goals because it doesn’t fit the ‘plan’ but the consequence is surrendering your joy.”
The book is available at coachmeblu.com and you can follow Genesis Blu on all social media platforms.
Naturally, they both wished me well with learning drums. Allen said he’d jam with me because he’s a friend who has drunk beer in my backyard and played in bands with my son for years now. He wants to see me succeed. And Blu reminded me that success is a term I get to define in this pursuit and “it’s more about the journey than the destination. The truth is, the value actually lies in how you grow, evolve, learn in the process rather than just the achievement of the goal.
“Trying something new builds confidence, resilience and self-trust,” she told me. “It reminds you that you’re capable of evolving, not just staying in the same roles or routines. This is the natural order for humans, as statistically we change or transition to something new or different five to seven times throughout our lives. So, reinventing ourselves is the norm and not the exception.
“Even if it doesn’t turn into something long-term, you still gain clarity about what you enjoy, what you don’t and what matters to you. That kind of self-awareness is always worth it.”
