Random Ephemera

5 Censorships That Were Good Ideas

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Mortal Kombat Fatalities

When Mortal Kombat hit home systems in September of 1993 on a day we'll always remember as Mortal Monday, gamers were faced with a choice: Go with the technically inferior but uncensored Genesis version, or the superior but censored SNES version. Nintendo was still desperately hanging onto the idea that every game it licensed had to fit for all audiences, and this battle between the two systems was what finally ended that policy.

Which is somewhat sad because the censored fatalities were actually much cooler than the uncensored. Without the cheap decapitations and copious amount of blood, designers had to get creative. Sub-Zero and Raiden especially benefited, losing what are in retrospect really boring head removals with a clever ice smash and a damned incineration!

As for the rest, Scorpion and Sonya didn't really lose anything, Liu Kang's finisher was always bloodless (and stupid), Kano still does the heart rip, albeit less clearly, and Johnny Cage sinks his foot calf deep in his opponent's body! That's much better than a stupid uppercut. I kind of wish they'd bring that one back now that blood is no issue.

Nick Fury, Agent of Shield #2

Ah, the Comic Code Authority... famous for telling Neil Gaiman, "There's no masturbation in the DC Universe." It was a body designed to neuter the comic medium into as inoffensive and sterile an art form as possible. Sometimes it succeeded, and sometimes it failed hilariously.

Jim Steranko started writing books on pre-Samuel L. Jackson Nick Fury back in the 1960s, and his goal was to make a smooth, sexy spy that even Jackson can't top. Marvel went to great lengths to keep Steranko in line, changing whole panels to avoid any undue sex or violence.

That up there is from Agent of Shield #2, and Fury is totally about to nail the Countess, whose curves and cleavage were a favorite CCA target. The last panel was originally a shot of the fully clothed couple embracing and kissing. It was deemed unacceptable, and Marvel substituted an image of Fury's hard, well-oiled gun slid deeply and firmly into a sleek, supple leather holster...

Yeah, that's like a million times more erotic. That's the sort of thing they used to do in Emmanuelle films. Good work, Marvel.

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Jef Rouner (not cis, he/him) is a contributing writer who covers politics, pop culture, social justice, video games, and online behavior. He is often a professional annoyance to the ignorant and hurtful.
Contact: Jef Rouner