Why We Want It: Neil Gaiman's Sandman changed comic books forever. The groundbreaking series followed the almost omnipotent personification of dreams as he struggled to come to terms with a world that he feels increasingly detached from. His brief stint as the owner of an abandoned Hell where he must deal with various mythological envoys who wish to purchase it from him is worth the read alone for its existential exploration of the nature of evil and choice. Plus, we're dying to see Dream's sister Delirium brought to life on the big screen.
Why It's a Bad Idea: There is no bad guy in Sandman, not really. There are certainly no significant battles between Dream and antagonists that aren't handily ended by the fact that he is pretty much all-powerful. Mostly, Dream's struggles are inner, and that doesn't translate well in a world where comic book movies are all expected to be slugfests and freak parades. The only way you could tackle Sandman in a manner that would make money would be to play up the early adventures as a straight horror film. Even though that's a viable option, and wouldn't require too much loose adaptation, it would more or less destroy everything that Gaiman fans love about the overall series, and still isn't likely to be marketable enough to pull in a big enough new crowd.
How About Instead We Film: Good Omens. A film adaptation of the comic end-of-the-world novel that Gaiman collaborated with Terry Pratchett on has been sitting dead in the water even though Terry Gilliam himself has been trying to get it off the ground since 2002. Even with Beowulf, Stardust and Coraline doing good business, Hollywood apparently has some kind of hate-on for what would be the comedic hit of the century.
Why We Want It: House of Leaves is the most amazing experimental horror novel ever written. On the surface, it's the story of a house that is bigger on the inside than on the outside. However, that doesn't even scratch the surface of its mind-boggling and insane prose and layout that will chill you to the very bone with its bald look at complete insanity. Lovecraft himself could not have imagined a book more terrifying to read. Take our advice, never read more than one chapter a night, and never ever read it without all the lights on. Otherwise you honestly court madness.
Why It's a Bad Idea: Well, other than the fact that we're worried a perfect film adaptation might actually result in a population of highly disturbed people always fleeing from ajar closet doors, there's the fact that making a movie out of it is impossible. Hell, writing it should've been impossible. Even though at its heart the book is actually about a film about the house, it's so multilayered that the true reality of the story is a tangle of weaved plotlines with no obvious solution. We don't even know where you'd begin to write a script for House of Leaves.
How About Instead We Film: The 50 Year Sword. We're still waiting on a U.S. release date for Danielewski's comparatively normal ghost story, but by all accounts it would be a fantastic film for someone like Aronofsky to try and bring to cinematic life. Plus, it's already been presented as a shadow play, so adaptation has been proven to be at least technically possible.
