This past Friday my daughter lost her Paw Paw to a combination of Alzheimer's and heart disease. It's not necessarily her first brush with death. Her daycare had several class pets die and erected a little graveyard called the Garden of the Fallen Tree where they had small funerals. She knows that she's named after a friend of mine and my wife's who passed away a decade ago, but this is the first time that I've had to explain to her that someone she loved was simply not going to be on the planet anymore.

It's one of those defining parent moments, and as usual I muddled through with a combination of improvisation and the fact that a five-year-old is much smarter than me. She seems to accept it well, and as I often do I compile the things I learned from my mistakes and present them to you in hopes you'll do better.

FLASHBACK Doctor Who: The Doctor and I Explain Death to a Four-Year-Old

Get a Book In House With One F our motto is, "When in Doubt, Get a Book". It's our answer to everything from a bad day to minor car repair, and it's often helpful for the more difficult of milestones in a child's life. We got a Berenstain Bears book about moving when we moved, and this time we picked up I Miss You by Pat Thomas.

Here's the thing; you may think you're a great communicator. Hell, I do this for a living, explaining things to others. It's different, though, when it's your kid crying and upset and full of questions. In that case you'll find that the calm act of reciting someone else's words can really set a more sedate and reflective pace, not to mention the fact that for most kids something printed on the page is always going to carry the weight of truth a bit heavier than their parents.

Just be warned that sometimes books are written by complete nutbangers and you should always check the reviews first.

Encourage Emotional Expression Through Activities I'm not sure if this is a Southern thing or a universal thing, but one of the signs someone has lost a loved one that I always see is a pristinely clean house and the smell of freshly cooked or baked food. When life throws a curve ball, often the way we adults swing for the pitch is to keep our hands busy doing the basic tasks of life.

Kids have that same need, but usually fewer responsibilities (And take less satisfaction in them in any case). This is a good time to bust out a craft project. Get them to draw pictures of good times spent with the lost person, or maybe sing a song that adequately expresses their feelings. If they're more physical, suggest a walk in the park or something to get their muscles engaged so their brain can install this new, terrible update in their brains without having nervous energy scream at them.

Plus, there's always just the slightest chance you may get them to clean their room this way.

This story continues on the next page.