| Gaming |

BioShock Infinite Debuts Heavy-Hitters, Plus 5 Other Video Game Mega-Threats

Keep Houston Press Free
I Support
  • Local
  • Community
  • Journalism
  • logo

Support the independent voice of Houston and help keep the future of Houston Press free.

Things have finally been really moving on the upcoming third game in the critically acclaimed BioShock series of first person shooters. Set years before the original Rapture Saga, Infinite takes place on a flying city called Columbia where ultra-nationalism has plunged the city into chaos and violence just as ultra-Randian philosophies did to Andrew Ryan's undersea utopia. Our hero, a former Pinkerton named Booker DeWitt travels to Columbia to rescue a woman named Elizabeth with amazing powers, and becomes involved in the civil war being waged high above the Earth.

Though many characteristics of the original games have been retained, absent is the iconic dive suit-wearing enemies called the Big Daddies. Obviously, there is not much use for them in a flying city, but that doesn't mean that Infinite is devoid of major threats outside of its regular armed populace.

The creators have developed four so-called heavy hitters to replace the drill-armed protectors of the Little Sisters, and have released promotional videos for two of them so far. The first is a madman's version of the Hall of Presidents automatons called the Motorized Patriots. Crafted to look like George Washington, these clockwork Terminators wield gatling guns against you.

Just revealed are the gorilla-like Handymen. These poor souls have been permanently wrapped in large metal suits with giant hands and great strength. Their primary offense is either a devastating shoulder charge, or hurling other characters at you. This makes them as deadly to your enemies as they are to yourself. Two more heavy hitters are scheduled to debut in the coming weeks, and the game itself finally has a solid release date of October 16.

Mega-threats like the heavy hitters are nothing new. Plenty of games have enemies that don't qualify as bosses or mini bosses, but are just as deadly since they often are found out and about in the regular game world. In order to welcome the Motorized Patriots, the Handymen, and others to come, we celebrate those bad guys.

Creeper (Minecraft)

The Creeper is a terrifying enemy. Not only does it rush up to you and explode, doing mega damage to both you and to the surrounding construction, it is totally silent except for a low hissing noise. Most likely, you'll only know you've been attacked by one when you're picking yourself up off the ground after the boom.

Divider (Dead Space)

Pretty much every enemy from Dead Space could be included on this list, but there's a special place in Space Hell for the guy who came up with the Dividers. They aren't a big part of the series, appearing less than ten times total between the two games, but they emit a horrible moan, can strangle you to death, and there is nothing creepier than blowing them apart and having all the leftover bits come crawling after you.

Hunters (Resident Evil)

The thing that would've made the first Resident Evil movie jump from "all right" to "pretty good" is including Hunters. To this day, they're still on top of the list of enemies in the series that can make you crap your pants. The unearthly shriek, freakish agility, and being able to decapitate you in one swipe are all part of their unholy presence.

Tonberry (Final Fantasy)

Don't let the small size of the Tonberry fool you. They are a staple of the Final Fantasy series that has always been capable of ending your adventure on the end of their butcher knives. They've appeared as regular encounters, bosses, and even as summon monsters, but in all incarnations they have impossibly high HP, and slowly walk towards the players until they're in range to stab them for what is usually an instant death attack.

Temptress (Dante's Inferno)

If Andy Warhol had been a Japanese video game designer working off a badly translated version of the Diving Comedy, Dante's Inferno is exactly what he would've produced. It's mostly a God of War rip-off, but what it lacked in originality it made up for in mind-blowing offensiveness. You start out fighting the souls of unbaptized babies, and really it just gets worse.

The Temptress characters are first encountered in Cleopatra's tower. They writhe in sexual want, sometimes turning around and offering their wiggling backsides, but then they sprout a giant, bloody, barbed penis from their vaginas and stab you with it. Then they reel you in and rape you until you die. Really.

Keep the Houston Press Free... Since we started the Houston Press, it has been defined as the free, independent voice of Houston, and we would like to keep it that way. Offering our readers free access to incisive coverage of local news, food and culture. Producing stories on everything from political scandals to the hottest new bands, with gutsy reporting, stylish writing, and staffers who've won everything from the Society of Professional Journalists' Sigma Delta Chi feature-writing award to the Casey Medal for Meritorious Journalism. But with local journalism's existence under siege and advertising revenue setbacks having a larger impact, it is important now more than ever for us to rally support behind funding our local journalism. You can help by participating in our "I Support" membership program, allowing us to keep covering Houston with no paywalls.

We use cookies to collect and analyze information on site performance and usage, and to enhance and customize content and advertisements. By clicking 'X' or continuing to use the site, you agree to allow cookies to be placed. To find out more, visit our cookies policy and our privacy policy.