Film and TV

Breaking Bad: What Should Happen Next Half of a Season

As our own Abby Koenig broke it down yesterday, this past Sunday night's half-season of Breaking Bad ended with a killer cliffhanger, with Walter White's brother-in-law on the toilet in the White residence making the WW connection, caught literally with his pants down. Sweet and poetic.

The reaction to the tense cliffhanger ending was mixed, with super Bad fans crying in agony about having to wait another year for resolution, and others resigned to the cruel machinations of series creator Vince Gilligan.

Either way, next year's premiere episode will see some of the biggest ratings in television history.

So we thought up some ways the other half of the season should go.

Hank Buys Into The Family Business

After Hank realizes that this whole time the biggest meth kingpin in his jurisdiction has been using him as a sounding board and worse, a babysitter, he doesn't just get mad. He asks for his cut in the White loot. Hank is easily embarrassed, and the idea that Walter was within literal inches of his grasp for years is too much for him to endure. With his knowledge, he and Walter could make that pile in Skyler's storage unit look like an ant hill.

Walter Kills Hank, Heisenberg-Style And Goes On The Run

It could be the ricin, a simple bullet to the head, and a trip into a bucket of acid for Hank once Walter realizes that he's been found out. This would explain a hirsute Walter in episode one of this season in a diner celebrating his birthday.

Walt Jr. Eats Breakfast For A Whole Episode

Look (series creator) Vince Gilligan, I saw Walter Jr. only eat breakfast once or twice this past half-season. Feed the fucking meme beast and set one of the last episodes at the White breakfast table while "Flynn" gorges on grapefruit, cereal, omelets, sausage, bacon, pancakes, French toast, crepes, and waffles. I implore you, it's the only way to end the series. In a syrupy, stinky mess.

Hank Has A Heart Attack On The Toilet, Elvis-Style

It could happen. He's a bigger fella, doesn't do much cardio, still coming back from the shooting injury, and maybe the shock of being one of the biggest fools in DEA history is too much for him to deal with. He could die peacefully on the john before he gets to make a single phone call.

It Was All A Dream!

All the action in the past five seasons was just a dream in Walter's head as he lies comatose suffering the last weeks of terminal cancer. He comes to, right at the end, only to spy his former student Jesse Pinkman as an orderly at the hospice and gives him a high-five.

But Seriously...

It's going to be bloody next summer. People who don't deserve to die will (Marie?) and there is always the possibility that Todd has been an undercover plant, even above Hank's head.

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Craig Hlavaty
Contact: Craig Hlavaty